I was beginning to realize it was not such a good thing my boyfriend was a private investigator. Although I had left that stuff out for anyone to see, still.

I was so exasperated at Luke knowing everything, I rolled my eyes to the ceiling and then said something stupid. There was no excuse for it. I should have protected the information with everything I had, taken it to my grave, kept it buried and never let it out, even under torture.

In my defense, I wasn’t myself. Too much had happened to me with Dom, with Ren, with Noah even with f**king Riley and, most especially, with Luke.

That was why I didn’t stop myself before saying, “I can’t believe while I was downstairs with Noah and he was demonstrating why he’s the ultimate jerk, you were searching my house.”

The air in the room instantly went thick with tension, my eyes flew from the ceiling to lock on Luke’s and I realized my mortal mistake when I saw his face had gone stony. Scary stony. Fury-unleashed stony.

Gonzo stony.

“What did you just say?” he asked through his teeth.

“Nothing,” I replied quickly.

“You didn’t say nothin’, you said somethin’.”

“No, I meant –”

He advanced. I retreated.

My back hit the door and he came up close. “He was in your house while I was in your house?”

Like I did the night before, hoping it would work again, I put my hands to his neck to try to get through to him, calm him.

“Luke, please, listen to me –”

“He touched you then, didn’t he?”

My eyes grew wide that he guessed this (how could he guess this?) and, unfortunately, my eyes told the truth for me.

It was then Luke went gonzo. No neck touch, soft voice and pleading were going to help, no way.

He turned from me and, with a vicious blow and a ferocious growl, he punched the wall, his hand going clean through, drywall dust poofing out. I stared in horror as he pulled his hand out of the wall and then punched it again, leaving another hole.

He wasn’t quite through. After Wall Punch Two, he turned, walked to a locker and punched that. His fist against the steel made a huge noise and my horrified stare turned part terrified, part amazed when the steel buckled and the sides of the door bowed out. He hit it again then again and I charged him.

“Luke!” I shouted, throwing my arms around him to stop him from hurting himself. If he kept doing that he was going to crush his hand. “Stop it! Please, stop!”

His arm sliced around my waist lifting me clean off my feet, up through the air. He took three long strides and I landed on my ass on the counter of the kitchenette. He closed in, coming between my legs, his hands, one of them bloody, moving to either side of my face. He held on and stared at me, his face hard and angry and my heart was beating like a jackhammer.

It was then the door opened. I looked over his shoulder and Lee, Vance and Mace were there making the room seem even smaller.

“What the f**k is goin’ on?” Lee asked.

Luke turned halfway to them, his eyes to the floor, he didn’t look at them. I noticed a muscle in his jaw was jumping and I took this as a good sign that he was trying to regain control. He took a hand away from my face, sliced it in a sweep, palm down and low, indicating nonverbally (and likely incorrectly) that he had himself in check.

“Tell me this shit didn’t just get worse,” Lee said.

“This shit just got worse,” Luke answered, his voice an angry growl. “Give us a minute.”

I closed my eyes and when I opened them again, Lee, Vance and Mace had backed out and Lee was closing the door.

“Luke, listen to me,” I begged.

He twisted back to face me and I caught my breath because his gonzo actions hadn’t even touched his level of fury. He was still pushing the very top edge of the red zone.

“Talk to me,” he clipped and it wasn’t a request.

“Maybe –”

“Ava, do not keep any more of this shit from me. Tell me what the f**k happened, right, f**king, now.”

My body went stiff. “Luke, you seem to keep forgetting, it happened to me. It didn’t happen to you, it happened to me and I should –”

He framed my face with his hands again and got close. “It happened to you, babe, but at the same time, it happened to us.”

I pushed at his shoulders and yelled, “How dare you!”

He didn’t move, instead he kept talking, “Last night, I put my hand between your legs and you froze. If you weren’t you, if you didn’t have the strength to sort your f**kin’ head out and work through it that could have had a whole different ending. It says somethin’ about you that you could work through it. Hell, it demonstrates one of the reasons I want to be the one, the only one, who puts my hand between your legs. You were most other women we wouldn’t have had last night. Most women would shut down and last night could have taken weeks, months, maybe never have happened at all. I was prepared to work through it with you. Lucky for me, you aren’t most other women. That still doesn’t take away the fact that it could have been a long road for both of us.” He got even closer. “Sex is sex, babe, with anyone else. With you, it isn’t. It’s a f**kuva lot more. You know it. I know it and he could have taken that away from us. After all these years we found it and he could have taken it away. Not just from you but from me too. Do you understand?”

Tears filled my eyes and before I could deep breathe they spilled down my cheeks.

I understood. I really understood. Furthermore, I understood I wouldn’t be dancing at my wedding because Luke declared he wasn’t going to dance with me and I would be bearing him three sons (or daughters, whatever). And I wanted that, with everything that was me, but more Luke wanted it just as much as me.

Noah had put all that in jeopardy.

It was then, my tilty-world righted and for the first time in a long time, maybe the first time in my life, I felt my feet planted firmly on the ground.

I didn’t answer but I didn’t have to.

Luke watched me cry for a few beats and then said softly, “He’s gonna pay for those too.”

“What?” I asked in a shaky voice, trying hard to pull myself together.

“Your tears.”

At his words, I put my hands to his face and it was me who rested my forehead against his at the same time a sob tore from my throat.