“I understand that, but men don’t really think that way. I think all your dad is seeing is his best friend, who’s his age, crawling all over his daughter. It’s a typical father reaction, I think.”

I sink down onto the floor and rub my pulsing forehead. I’ve had a massive headache since this all started last night and it’s not letting up.

“I don’t know what to do, Chloe. I’m so confused and heartbroken.”

“Do you want my honest advice? I don’t know if it’s the right advice, but it’s my best advice based on how well I know you and your situation and how you grew up.”

“Okay. Let’s hear it.”

“I think you need to get away from both of them for a while.”

“Chloe…”

“Just listen. You’ve spent your entire life encapsulated in this little world with your parents, and the band, and Tor. I think your family is great; I love your dad and I think Tor is a rare gem, but I think you need to cut the cord from both of them for a while and just be you. You and your father are way too attached to each other. He has to learn how to let you go, and you have to stop trying to take care of him.”

I let her words filter in and take hold. Deep down, I know what she’s saying is true. I just don’t know how to let go. And I don’t think my dad and Tor do, either. We’re all mangled up in each other.

“I don’t know…”

“Kenzi, you have to do some soul searching and stand on your own for awhile without your father on one side of you and Tor on the other. And your father needs to accept the fact that he created this monster he now hates. You can’t shove two people together practically 24/7 and expect that nothing may grow from it. And I think in some ways, your dad is holding onto you because of what happened to your mother. You’re not her,” she says softly. “He needs to stand on his own, too, and so does Tor. I mean seriously, the guy has spent almost his entire life with you. He took that role of guardian and freakin’ ran with it. I’m not saying he’s not really in love with you, because I think he is, but I think you guys all need some major separation to get your shit together. And after you all do some thinking and settling down, then figure out where you want to go from there,” she pauses, giving me time to absorb. “I know you won’t come here to New York, so why don’t you go to Katherine’s for a few months? You love it there and she doesn’t suffocate you.”

“I’m afraid to leave them.” I’m afraid they’ll kill each other. I’m afraid I’ll lose them both. I’m afraid of missing them.

“I know you are. But I think you have to, for all of you. Give them time to work this out between them. Maybe they will, maybe they won’t. Give Tor time to think, and give yourself some time to get out from under them and then follow your heart. I think in the end, it will be what’s best for all of you.”

“What you’re saying all makes so much sense. I’m just scared. I don’t want to hurt them. And I’m afraid if I leave Tor I might lose him forever.”

“If that happens, Kenzi, then it just wasn’t meant to be. But I honestly think the guy will wait a hundred years for you.”

I lean back against my bed, mulling this all over in my mind. Everything Chloe said rings true.

As frightening as it feels, it also seems like it might be what needs to be done for all of us to find our way to the other side of this.

I stand in the doorway for a few moments before I cross the room with slow, light steps, and lower myself into the blue vinyl chair next to the bed.

Taking her hand in mine, I’m comforted by how warm it is. I run my finger over her wedding band. Never taken off.

There is life here. There is hope here. There is so much love here.

“Mom…I’m so sorry I haven’t been here,” Her eyes are closed and her breathing is soft and even. Her blonde hair cascades around her on the white pillow like a golden halo, and she looks as beautiful to me as she did the day this happened to her. She still looks so young and vibrant.

“I miss you so much. I’m eighteen now and so much has happened. I wish we could talk. I know you could help me and would have the right words to say. I’m in love with Toren, Mom. I know you would understand. I want what you wanted. I want to get married and have a baby and just have a nice, simple, happy life with Tor. He wants that, too. Daddy is so mad. He can’t see that what we have is so special and so right. I don’t want to lose either one of them, but they’re tearing each other apart and I’m stuck in the middle,” I swallow hard. “I’m going to go stay with Aunt Katherine for a while. I’m going to have to leave Dad alone, Mom, and I’m sorry. I’ve tried to take care of him for you. He misses you and loves you so much. He’s still committed to you in every single way. But we need you. Especially Dad, he’s so lost without you. You always had a way to calm us all down and make everything better. So if you’re in there somewhere and you can hear me, try to come back. We’re all here for you and we love you.”