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Page 31
Page 31
“What does it look like I’m doing?” she asked, unbuttoning two more buttons, until her dress was open to her waist.
He’d been standing frozen at his desk, staring at her. He’d be dead if he wasn’t excited by this, but he needed to end this. Now.
“Maddie.” He started buttoning her dress back up. “Stop this. What’s gotten into you? I’m at work; we can’t do this now.”
She pushed his hands away and pulled her belt off.
“I know you’re at work—that’s the fucking point.” She pushed him backward, until his butt hit the back of his desk. “Don’t you want to fuck me on top of your desk? You told me you did; you said it would be so hot. Well, now’s your opportunity.”
He had told her that, but he hadn’t been seriously suggesting that she come to his office in the middle of the day and start taking her clothes off.
She reached for his belt and unbuckled it before he could stop her. But as she reached for his fly, he took ahold of her wrists.
“We can’t do this right now. I’m at work. Anyone could walk in at any time. Including my boss, the mayor, who would rightly fire me on the spot. And including your best friend, the one who you’re desperately keeping it a secret from that you’re sleeping with me, remember?”
She pulled her wrists away and stepped back.
“She’s at a meeting in San Francisco. Along with your boss, by the way.” She turned away from him and buttoned up her dress with her back to him. “I texted her earlier to see if she was around, and she said she was just walking into the meeting, so I knew it would be a while. But never mind, you’re obviously too scared to take a little risk, even though it would be the hottest thing you’ve ever done in your conservative, boring, pathetic life, so I’m just going to go now.”
Ouch. He’d always known this thing would blow up when it ended; he just hadn’t quite expected it to happen so soon. Or like this.
“Fine. If you’re so self-absorbed that all you care about is yourself and what you want right now, and you can’t think about how your little stunt could affect me, then I guess you’re the person I used to always think you were. Enjoy the rest of your day. Lots of other people work in this building—why don’t you try one of them for your striptease routine, since it doesn’t seem to matter who you fuck right now.”
He started to turn back to his computer, but he couldn’t help but see the tears in her eyes. He’d said that to hurt her, but now that he had, he felt awful.
He walked back over to Maddie and looked at her. Something weird was definitely going on. Maddie could be a real bitch sometimes, but usually not like this.
He stepped around Maddie and stopped her from opening the door.
“Maddie.” He put his hand on her shoulder, and she shook it off. “Hey. What’s going on? Is something wrong?”
She threw her head back and crossed her arms.
“No, nothing’s wrong. Why would you think something’s wrong just because I want to do something fun for once, something adventurous, something spontaneous, something different from normal? Why does something have to be wrong? What if I just wanted a break from regular life, and wanted to live a little? Oh, right, I forgot; your version of living a little is to get Chinese food instead of pizza on a Friday night to go with your home improvement television shows geared toward middle-aged women. Why would I think I could rely on you to be there for me when I needed you?”
She reached for the door again, but again he blocked her.
“Hey. Can we just press the reset button for a second?”
The rage left her eyes, and her whole body deflated.
“Yeah.” She bent down to pick up her bag. “Sorry. I won’t bother you anymore.”
He looked harder at her. Oh shit, he knew what this was about. He felt like the biggest jackass in the world now.
“Your interview. It was today, wasn’t it? What happened?” He didn’t wait for an answer but wrapped his arms around her. He wasn’t sure if she would pull away again, but instead she nestled herself deep into his chest. They stood like that for a while, with him afraid to move, or say anything. When he stroked her hair, she started to sob.
She cried in his arms for a long time. He didn’t ask any questions; he barely moved. He just stroked her hair and rubbed her back. Finally, she took a deep breath and pulled away.
“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked.
She shook her head, then nodded. He wasn’t sure which one she actually meant, and he was still kind of mad at her for her insults earlier, but he knew he couldn’t let her go home alone.
“Okay.” He looked around his office and shook his head. “Not here. I have a call later, but I can do it from home.” He threw his computer and phone in his bag and pulled his jacket on.
“Here.” He took a few tissues from the box on his desk and dabbed at the damp makeup stains on her face. She forced a smile and took the tissues from him.
“How terrible do I look?” she asked.
He touched her cheek.
“You could never look terrible.” He handed her another tissue. “ But . . . you do look like you’ve had an awful day.”
She wiped her face and dropped the tissue in the trash can. When she looked back up at him, she laughed.
“Your poor shirt. I think I ruined it. I’m sorry.”
He looked down at his shirt, which was now mottled by a variety of damp makeup stains. He zipped up his jacket and shook his head.
“No problem. Luckily, it was cold this morning and I wore a jacket that will cover this all up on my way home. And I’m very good at laundry; I bet I can get these stains out.”
He started to open his office door, but this time she stopped him.
“Should we not leave your office together? I mean, with the closed door and all, I don’t want people to think . . . I don’t want to embarrass you or get you in trouble.”
He touched her cheek, just for a second.
“Thanks for that.” He cleared his throat. “Did you drive here? Do you want to meet me outside?”
She adjusted her bag on her shoulder.
“Yeah, my car’s just around the corner. Meet me there in a few minutes?”
He opened the door and went back to his desk.
“See you then.” He tried to say it offhand, for the benefit of the people who might be walking by, so it wouldn’t seem like this was a big deal or like they’d had some big emotional moment. Then he forced himself to look back down at the papers on his desk and not watch her walk away.
As Maddie walked through the hallway to the stairwell, she prayed the whole time she wouldn’t run into anyone who knew her. Plenty of Alexa’s coworkers other than Theo had met her, and the last thing she wanted was for one of them to stop her and force her into a conversation with them, when she felt wrung out and humiliated, after the day she’d just had and then what had gone on in Theo’s office.
She couldn’t tell what part of today was worse: how terrible she’d felt after her interview; Theo rejecting her and trying to button her clothes back up when she’d been convinced he would be thrilled by her little striptease; or her lengthy sobbing fit against Theo’s warm chest and beautiful shirt.
And on top of all that, now she felt like an asshole for not thinking of how her little stunt could affect Theo. She really hoped no one had noticed her walk into his office; the last thing she wanted was for him to get in trouble because of her.
When she made it to her car, she put her head in her hands. What an awful day. After the disastrous interview, she’d texted Alexa and asked if she was busy—she’d known Alexa would be able to talk her through this and make her feel better. But Alexa had said she was just about to go into a meeting in SF with her boss, and was it important? Maddie had lied and said it could wait.
Then she’d had the—she now recognized—unhinged thought that what would really make her feel better was some really hot animal sex with Theo on top of his desk. His desk, at City Hall. In the middle of the day, when everyone was at work. What the hell had she been thinking?
She sat up and put her key in the ignition. Why was she sitting here waiting for Theo to come to her car, anyway? She already felt terrible about what she’d done. Seeing him again would just make it worse. She should just drive away, text him she was sorry, and then ignore him for the rest of her life.
She jumped at the knock on her passenger-side window. Theo. Great timing.
“Oh good, you’re still here,” he said as he got into the car. “I was worried you’d just drive away and leave me here.”
She started the car and pulled out of her parking space. This guy was getting to know her far too well.
“I don’t know why you’d think I’d do that,” she said. He just looked at her and didn’t respond.