“A chance you could be tortured and killed.”

So I’d had the same thought. So what. “But at least I’ll have done something.” I had to do something. “And what if I’m the one, huh?” The girl who would sacrifice herself to save many. “What if I need to die?”

“You don’t. What we read might be a counterfeit.”

“It isn’t. It was part of the journal.”

He lowered his head, and his nose pressed against mine. “What if you’re not the one? You would have put yourself in harm’s way for nothing.”

He had an argument for everything. “Not for nothing.” But, okay, fine, I did get where he was coming from. “No matter what, we have to get those boys back. That’s priority one.”

A moment passed, the tension heating me up inside.

“You’re right,” he said and nodded. “But we’ll do things my way.”

“Agreed. If your way is my way.”

He snorted. “Forget the right way—my way—for now.”

“Already done. Now, enough talking. I’ve got a better use for your mouth.” I brushed my lips against his and pushed his shoulders, easing him back on the rug.

He quickly rolled me over. His movements were as sleek as a panther’s as he spread himself over me and pinned me down. “This your way of distracting me?” He kissed the line of my jaw, and my veins became a conduit for tingling warmth. “Because it’s working.”

“You did promise me a second date, did you not?”

“I did.”

“Well, this is what I want to do.”

“Lie here...talking?” He unveiled a slow, wicked smile.

The blood in my veins flashed white-hot. “Kissing...touching. More. Everything.”

Expression growing pained, he said, “Ali—”

“I almost died yesterday,” I interjected. “I could die tomorrow or even an hour from now. I want to be with you, Cole.”

“Ali—” he repeated.

“No. You are under the impression that this decision is yours. Or your dad’s. Well, news flash. It isn’t. It’s ours. I’m ready. I’ve been ready. You’re ready.”

A battle seemed to wage in his mind. “I’ve talked myself into and out of this all day.”

So he had contemplated it. “What are my eyes saying?”

He pressed his forehead against mine. “Too much.”

“And I’m sure every word is riveting. Listen to them.”

I tangled my fingers in his hair and placed scorching kisses along his jawline. It wasn’t long before he angled his head, meeting my lips with his own, stealing my breath.

“You’re sure?” he rasped, hands beginning to wander.

He got his answer when I maneuvered him to his back...and made my move.

Chapter 23

A MIND IS A TERRIBLE

THING TO WASTE

I wanted to stand on a rooftop and shout. Hey, world! Cole and I finally had sex!

The big event ended over an hour ago, but we hadn’t moved from the rug. Well, I hadn’t. He had, but for only a moment, when he’d disposed of the condom. Then he’d returned and gathered me close. I was glad. I was still utterly overwhelmed. Me and Cole. Cole and me. The two of us. Together.

Was it stalker-clingy to think our souls were now melded together?

Probably. But I didn’t care! We’d had sex!

As much as I belonged to him, he now belonged to me. Not just in word, but in deed. There was responsibility. Accountability. And yes, those things had been a part of our relationship before, but...everything just felt different now. More intense.

He held me in his arms, as if I was a precious treasure. Considering what we’d just done—melded souls!—I had better be. I could feel the thump, thump of his heartbeat, a riotous pound in sync with my own.

“You okay?” he asked.

I propped my chin in an upraised palm and peered down at him. His dark hair was rumpled and sexy, his eyes at half-mast. His lips were slightly swollen from the force of my kisses. Honestly? He’d never looked better.

“I think so.” A deep sense of vulnerability washed over me—it wasn’t the first time. “What about you? Wishing we’d waited two more years, as planned?”

“I think we both know that plan was destined to fail. And stupid. And a crime against nature.”

I kissed the spot just over his nipple ring. “You gave it your best shot.”

“That’s all a guy can do, really,” he said as he played with my hair.

“Well, A for effort.”

“Oh, are we scoring each other now?”

“No!” I blurted...then nibbled on my bottom lip. “Yes?”

He chuckled. “You are off the charts, love. The best. My favorite. No one compares.”

“Obviously,” I replied, my tone imperious.

His chuckle morphed into a snort.

Another wave of vulnerability washed over me. “You love me, right? Now and always?”

“Of course I love you. And you believe me, because you trust me to always be honest with you.”

Just like I would always be...honest with...

Oh, crap. I hadn’t been honest with him. I hadn’t told him about Helen. I’d had sex with him, but hadn’t freaking told him about Helen.

I knew how devastating a single lie could be. How it could destroy a lifetime of trust. And this was a lie. A lie of omission. But I couldn’t tell him now. Not while our clothes were scattered around us and we were basking in the warmth of the fire.