Chapter Four


Kelly hadn't realized her hands were shaking until she picked up the telephone on the table beside her bed. At that moment she wanted to curse. She was pissed! And it wasn't Ryan she was angry at. She had become what she detested most: discourteous and ill-mannered.

Ryan had come to her, asking they go somewhere and talk. She hadn't even asked him what he had wanted to talk about before she slammed the door in his face.

Was she losing it because of an erotic dream?

Dialing the area code for Washington, D.C., she waited for the connection. She smiled upon hearing her sister's cheery greeting.

"Hi, Pam."

"Hey, Kelly. I hope you're calling to tell me that you have a date tonight."

She ignored the reference to a date. Even if she had gone out with Ryan she still would not have considered it a date. "I called to say hello to my big sister."

A groan came through the earpiece. "You called me last Saturday to say hello. What are you doing, Kelly? You've moved across the state and your social life hasn't changed. I think it would've been better if you had stayed in New York where you at least had a circle of friends."

"Married friends, Pamela."

"I know that, Kelly. But there's always the possibility that they could've hooked you up with a single friend or relative."

"I can always stop calling you - "

"I'm sorry," Pamela said, interrupting her. "I just got off the phone with Mama and Daddy. They've begun an intense campaign to try to make me feel guilty because I finally came out and told them that Leo and I decided not to have children. I don't know how much more of it I can take."

"Tell them that you don't want to discuss it."

"You try and tell Camille Kelly Andrews not to say what's on her mind."

Kelly smiled. Pamela was right. Camille may have been outspoken and opinionated, but she was also fiercely supportive of her daughters.

"If she mentions it to me the next time we talk I'll be diplomatic when I tell her that you and Leo have a right to determine your own lives. That you're still a family even if you decide not to have children."

"Thank you, Kel," Pamela said, using her pet name for her younger sister.

The two sisters talked for another ten minutes, Pamela giving Kelly an update on her new position as an assistant curator at the National Gallery of Art. Leo, her husband, had taken over as curator at the National Museum of African Art two years before.

The first star had made its appearance in the sky when she stripped off her clothes and pulled a sheet over her nude body. This time when she went to sleep there were no erotic dreams to disturb her slumber.

Ryan's footfall was heavy as he made his up the porch steps to his father's house and sat down on a rocker across from the older man. Sean sat on his grandfather's lap, asleep.

"That was quick."

"It was quick because she wouldn't talk to me."

Sheldon leaned forward. "Why not?"

"Why?" Ryan repeated. "I don't know why, Pop."

"What do you do to her?"

Stretching long legs out in front of him, Ryan crossed his feet at the ankles. "Nothing. I told her I wanted to talk to her and she closed the door in my face."

"Is that all?"

Ryan threw up a hand. "Is what all?"

"Why are you repeating everything I say?"

"Because I don't believe you're asking me these questions," Ryan shot back.

Recessed porch lights came on automatically in the waning light, flooding the space with beams of gold. It provided enough illumination for Sheldon to see a quivering muscle in Ryan's jaw.

"How did you look at her?"

Ryan struggled to contain his temper. "How does my looking at her have to do with anything?"

"Last night you looked at her as if she were dessert." He held up a hand when Ryan opened his mouth to refute his accusation. "You need to be gentle with her, son," Sheldon continued. There was a wistful quality to his voice.

Ryan decided to ignore his father's assessment of his reaction to Kelly as he stared at Sheldon, seeing what he unsuccessfully tried to conceal - pain. The last time he had seen pain in his father's eyes was the day Sheldon had buried his wife and the mother of his two sons.

"What happened to her, Pop?" he asked softly.

There was a noticeable pause and emerging nocturnal sounds were magnified in the silence. Sheldon sighed audibly. "She lost her husband a couple of years ago in a hit-and-run accident."

Ryan's eyes widened. He had no idea she was carrying that much emotional baggage. "How old is she?"

"Thirty."

A mysterious smile lifted the corners of Ryan's mouth when he recalled asking Kelly how old she was. He still thought she looked much younger than her age.

Sheldon glanced down at the small child sleeping on his lap. There were three generations of Blackstone men sitting on the porch and not one woman.

"Have you thought about remarrying and giving Sean a mother?"

"No more than you have when it came to giving Jeremy and me one."

Sheldon shook his head, smiling. "Touche, son."

"You've been widowed for twenty years, Pop. Don't you think it's time to let go?"

"I could say the same to you."

"No, you can't. Mom died. That's very different from dissolving a marriage."

"Do you ever think of remarrying?"

Ryan's eyes darkened until they appeared near black. "Yes and no. Yes, because I miss being part of an intact family unit, and no, because I have to think about Sean."

"Are you really thinking of him, Ryan? Both of you need a woman in your lives. How else will he learn to respect a woman if not from his father?

"I'm thinking only of him, Pop."

"The boy needs a mother, Ryan."

"People said the same to you when Mom died."

"That's true," Sheldon agreed. "The difference was you and Jeremy were fourteen and ten when Julia passed away. That's very different from a little boy who has no memories of his mother."

Ryan stared out into the night. He was so still he could have been carved out of granite. He knew his father was right, but knew he also was right. From the day he was born Sean had become the most important person in his life, and he made a pledge to never sacrifice the emotional well-being of his son for any woman.

Ryan stood at the window in his second-story bedroom early Monday morning, watching Kelly as she made her way to the stables. The last time he saw her had been Saturday night at her house. He had waited in the dining hall on Sunday, hoping to catch a glimpse of her, but she did not put in an appearance.

His eyes narrowed as he watched her knock on the door. It opened, and she disappeared behind it. Three grooms worked on a rotating basis once the stables were opened at sunrise to groom the eighteen horses before they were turned out to graze. The trainer and his assistants exercised the Thoroughbreds during the morning and early-afternoon hours.

What was she doing in the stable? Who was she meeting?

Turning away from the window, Ryan descended the staircase in a few long strides. He hadn't realized he was practically running until he felt his heart pumping rapidly in his chest. Taking a deep breath, he opened the stable door and walked inside.

An emotion he could only identify as relief swept over him when he saw Kelly rubbing Jahan's nose. She hadn't come to meet a man, but to see the horses.

"Beautiful."

Kelly jumped, turning to find Ryan standing behind her. It was the second time he had caught her off guard. She hadn't heard his approach over the sounds of a worker sweeping out a stall.

Turning back to the horse, she nodded. "That he is."

Ryan wanted to tell Kelly that he wasn't talking about Jahan. She looked scrumptious, casually dressed in a tank top and pair of jeans that showed every dip and curve of her tall, slender body. He stared at her feet.

"You should be wearing boots in here instead of running shoes."

"I don't have boots."

"Why not?"

"Because I haven't had the time to go buy a pair." She had spent Sunday restocking her pantry and refrigerator and putting up several loads of wash.

He moved closer. "Look at me, Kelly."

She went completely still. It had been only three days since she'd met Ryan for the first time, but the magnetism was definitely there. Something about him jolted her nervous system each time she met his gaze.

She wanted him even though she did not want to desire him, because in her head she wasn't quite ready to let go of the memory of her late husband. She had purposely avoided going to the dining hall, knowing Ryan would be there, so she continued to prepare her own meals at home.

"Why, Ryan?"

Resting his hands on her bare shoulders, he turned her to face him. "Because I want to look at you." He dropped his hands.

Her lashes fluttered before sweeping up to reveal what she so valiantly tried to conceal: her loneliness and a longing to be held and loved. Her gaze moved slowly over his face, lingering on his mouth. He wasn't wearing a hat, and his damp coal-black hair lay against his scalp in layered precision. His coloring, hair and features were a blending of races so evident in people in this region of the country.

"What do you see, Ryan?"

His dark gray eyes widened as they dropped from her steady gaze to her shoulders and chest. "I see an incredibly beautiful woman who in a few hours has worked wonders with my son." Sean had spent Saturday afternoon and all day Sunday asking when he was going back to school so that he could see Miss Kelly.

Kelly closed her eyes. It was not about her, but Sean. "He's a charming child."

Ryan wanted to tell his son's teacher that she had charmed him, too. He inclined his head. She tried stepping around him but he blocked her path.

"Why did you follow me in here? What is it you want from me?"

"I saw you from my bedroom window and I was curious as to why you'd come here so early. What is it I want from you?" He lifted a broad shoulder under a stark white T-shirt at the same time he shook his head. "I don't know, Kelly. That's something I haven't quite figured out."

Rising on tiptoe, she thrust her face close to his, close enough for him to feel her breath feather over his mouth. "Your homework assignment is to figure out what you want."

She pushed past him, heading for the door, but Ryan was quicker. He caught her arm, pulling her into an empty stall. "I want this," he whispered, seconds before his mouth covered hers in a hungry kiss that sucked the breath from her lungs.

His hands slipped up her arms, bringing her flush against him, and he deepened the kiss. Kelly put her arms around his neck to keep her balance, her soft curves melding with his lean length.

Her mouth burned with the pressure of his mouth moving over hers. The harsh, uneven rhythm of her breathing matched his; she was lost, drowning in the passion and the moment. It was only when she felt the probing of his searching tongue parting her lips that she pulled out of his embrace, gasping. The smoldering flame she saw in his eyes startled her. The lightning was out of the bottle.

Crossing his arms over his chest, Ryan angled his head. "I think that assignment deserves an A. What do you think, Miss Kelly?"

She placed her hands on her hips, ignoring the tingling sensations tightening her nipples. "I think you're disgustingly arrogant, Dr. Blackstone." She'd meant to insult him, but the breathlessness of the retort sounded like a compliment.

He smiled. "I've been called worse."

This time as she turned to walk out of the stables, he did not try to stop her. He followed, watching her straight back and the seductive sway of her hips.

"You owe me an apology, Miss Kelly."

She stopped, not turning around. "For what, Dr. Blackstone?"

"For closing your door in my face."

Kelly pulled her lower lip between her teeth. It was obvious she was attracted to Ryan, and despite her verbal protests she wanted to see him. "Share dinner with me tonight and I'll apologize properly." She glanced over her shoulder, seeing his shocked expression. A satisfied grin curved her mouth as she continued walking in the direction of her house.

Ryan knew he had shocked Kelly when he'd kissed her, but she had also surprised him when she'd held on to his neck.

There was a banked fire under Kelly Andrews's cool exterior. All he had to do was wait for the right time to re-ignite it. And something told him it would be good - not just for Kelly but also for him.

Kelly sat in the library corner with her students. All had eaten breakfast, cleaned up their table and were eagerly awaiting the first activity for their first day of school. Sitting on a stool, she smiled at their expectant expressions.

"Does anyone know what a calendar is?" Five hands went up. "Heather?"

"It tells days."

Kelly nodded. "Very good, Heather. What else can a calendar tell us?" She nodded to Sean, who hadn't lowered his hand.

"It tells weeks and months."

"We are going to use our calendar not only to tell us the date, but also for holidays, historic events, birthdays and special days, weeks and months. Today is May 23 - World Turtle Day."

"I found a turtle," Travis announced proudly.

"Yeah, but Mama wouldn't let him keep it. She said it belonged outside," Trent countered before he stuck his tongue out at his twin.

Reaching for a picture book, Kelly opened it to an illustration of a turtle. "Your mother is right. Animals need to live in what it is called their natural habitat. The turtle is the only reptile that has a shell."

Allison pointed to the picture. "His shell is his house."

Sean raised his hand. "Miss Kelly, my daddy said a turtle can put his head, tail and legs inside his house when other animals want to eat him."

"Your dad's correct." Kelly was certain Sean knew more about animals than most children his age because Ryan was a veterinarian. She handed Trent a green felt cutout of a turtle with a Velcro backing. "Please put this on today's date under the heading of World Turtle Day. Can anyone tell what kind of weather we're having today?"

"Sunny!" They all had called out in unison.

Kelly picked up another cutout of a yellow oval shape with points circling it. "Heather, can you put up the sun?"

She jumped up. "Yes, Miss Kelly."

The morning hours passed quickly wherein Kelly showed the children how to hold paste scissors and cut animal shapes from a stencil. They put on smocks, painted their animals, placing them on a table to dry.

Lunch was delivered from the dining hall at exactly at noon, and an hour later three boys and two girls lay on cots in the darkened room, lying quietly until they all fell asleep.

The children were awakened at two-thirty and taken outside where they played an energetic game of tag and hide-and-seek. They stopped long enough for an afternoon snack of juice and nuts with raisins; they returned to the playground area, playing on the swings and teeter-totter. Their moods and interests changed quickly when they retrieved a jump rope from a large plastic bin.

Allison's mother came to pick her up, and Kelly enlisted her aid in helping to turn the rope as the children jumped while reciting the letters of the alphabet. None of them got past M before their feet got tangled in the rope's length.

Allison took the rope from Kelly. "Let me turn with Mommy while you jump, Miss Kelly."

Before Kelly could refuse all of the kids were chanting, "Jump, Miss Kelly. Jump, jump, jump!"

She remembered her childhood days when she'd jumped Double Dutch with her girlfriends during the summer months. The life span for a pair of her sneakers was usually two weeks.

Measuring the speed of the turning rope, Kelly jumped in. "A, B, C, D..." The children recited the alphabet as she jumped up and down as if she were ten instead of thirty. She heard Sean call Daddy and she faltered.

Standing less than five feet away was Ryan, grinning from ear to ear. He, not Sheldon, had come to pick up Sean.

"You win, Miss Kelly!" Heather shouted. "You got to S."

"My name starts with S," Sean crowed proudly, pumping his little fist in the air. He wrapped his arms around Ryan's waist. "We had lots of fun today, Daddy."

Ryan smiled at Kelly. "I think Miss Kelly had lots of fun, too."

"She did. We all did."

"Yeah!" chorused five young voices.

Allison hugged Kelly around her knees. "I will see you tomorrow, Miss Kelly."

She pulled one of the girl's curly dark braids. "You bet I will."

Allison left with her mother and Kelly stared at Ryan staring back at her. Something intense flared through his entrancement, sending waves of heat throughout her body. His stormy gray eyes stoked a banked fire.

Ryan reached for Sean's hand, his gaze fixed on Kelly's face. A hint of a smile softened his strong mouth, and he was not disappointed when she returned it with a mysterious one of her own.

"Daddy?"

"Yes, Sean."

"Do I have to go home now?"

Ryan tore his gaze away from Kelly to glance down at his son for the first time since arriving at the schoolhouse. "Yes. Miss Kelly is tired. She has to go home and get some rest so she can be ready for school tomorrow."

"Can't she come home with us? She can rest in my room."

"No, she can't."

"Why not?"

"Because...because..."

"Because Miss Kelly lives in her own house," Kelly said when Ryan did not complete his statement.

"Why can't she live with us, Daddy?"

"Let's go, Champ. We have to wash up before dinner." Even though he had spoken to Sean, he continued to stare at Kelly. "I'll see you later," he said in a quiet voice.

Kelly nodded. "Okay."

Ryan smiled the sensual smile she had come to look for. His smile was still in place when he led Sean toward a pickup truck. Kelly turned her attention to the remaining children, her pulse quickening when she thought of her promise to meet with Ryan later that night.

There was no doubt she was drawn to his sexual attractiveness, but was that enough? Was it enough to lessen the pain of loving and losing a man she'd loved all of her life? She had met Simeon Randall when both were assigned to the same first-grade class, and he had become her hero, protector. As they grew older she discovered and experienced passion in his arms and bed. A passion she did not know she had.

Simeon had offered her all the emotional and physical gratification and fulfillment she needed. And for the first time since she had come to Blackstone Farms she had to question whether she might be lucky enough to capture both again.