He is evil. Evil. And I love it.

Holding his gaze, I roll over and get on my hands and knees. Avidly, he watches me crawl his way. My breasts sway with the movement, and he runs a hand over his swollen dick. His pecks twitch, his nipples tight beads. I lean in and lick one as I straddle is hips.

We both groan as I sink onto him. I’m so slicked up, so well attended that he slips right in. Still I feel it. I feel it at the back of my throat and along the soles of my feet. I feel it in the cool heat that races over my skin.

His hands grip my hips, tilting me forward. I catch myself by gripping his big shoulders, and he takes the opportunity to swoop in and draw my nipple into his mouth to suck it hard and greedy.

As if by mutual consent we start fucking, him thrusting up into me, me pushing down to get him in deep. It is frantic and fast. His fingers sink into the soft flesh of my ass, pulling at it, moving it. He’s so strong, I’m bouncing on his hips, our flesh meeting with loud slaps.

“Fuck, Chess,” he pants. “I can’t. I can’t…” He breaks off with a helpless sound and tries to kiss me.

But our movements are so violent and uncoordinated that our mouths barely meet. I wrap my arms around his neck. The walls of my sex clamp down on his dick, and he makes a strangled sound, his body jerking.

“Get there,” he pleads, thrusting harder.

But I’m too weak to do anything more than hang on. His hand slides down. No, he can’t. He can’t. I won’t survive. But he does it. He pushes his finger in deep and rough. And I come again on a wail.

He comes with me this time, making sounds that are almost pained.

We crash in a heap, me slumped on his chest, Finn’s head lolling against the headboard. His arm bands around me, and he cups the back of my sweaty necks as we lie there and regain our breath. His heart is a fast beat in my ear. Too late I remember his injuries.

“Let me get off you,” I say, trying to move.

His grip tightens. “No.”

Not wanting to struggle, I let him hold me, and he relaxes. He turns his head and rests his lips against my temple. “Do you have any idea how much I need you? You make everything better.”

Emotion clogs my throat. I blink rapidly, my cheek pressed to the wall of his chest. My arms wrap around his shoulders. I want to pull him into me, protect him from the world. “I thought…” I clear my throat. “I thought I might have messed things up.”

Finn stills, and then slowly smooths his hand over the back of my head. “You didn’t. It’s good to talk.”

I nod, but don’t say a word.

His touch is lazy, fingers carding through my hair. “My whole life, I’ve lived with my eye on the future. Every day, working for it. Worrying about it.” His hand comes to rest on my nape. “I’m tired, Chess. With you, I can rest.”

The beat of his heart is fast and strong against my cheek. Warm fingers tighten on my neck in entreat. “Can we rest for a while? Just be?”

There is true yearning in his voice, and that plea goes straight to my heart. From the beginning, Finn had been clear about what drew him to me; I turned off all the white noise in his head. It had been flattering, seductive to be his sole focus. It still is.

And it isn’t one sided. I did not know what true joy was until Finn. Every emotion I’m capable of having amps up with him. I feel. I live. I breathe. The world is more real when he is there.

He wants to just be. Not think. I don’t know if I can. But, for Finn, I’ll try.

With a smile that feels too weak, I place a kiss on the center of his chest. “Yes,” I say against his skin. “Let’s just be.”

Chapter Twenty

Chess

* * *

“So, how are you getting along?” I ask James on the phone. I know Jamie is a programmer and has a tiny efficiency walk-up on the Lower East Side, but Manhattan is ridiculously expensive. James will have to get a job quickly.

“I’m waiting tables at this cute osteria in SoHo.”

I’m not surprised; James waited tables through college, and the money will probably be more than he earned with me.

He gives me the name of one of New York’s biggest chef’s Italian restaurants, and I bite back a smile. Leave it to James to understate.

“We’re so eating there whenever I visit,” I tell him, rubbing some coconut oil onto my damp heel. Swathed in a towel, I’ve taken over the bathroom, refusing to let Finn enter while I get ready for tonight. He’d pretended to pout about it for a few minutes, but soon gave up and walked away with a fairly satisfied expression. Not that I blame him; I’d satisfied him very well all morning long.

“You got a deal,” James says. “How about you? Things picking up?”

Sitting on the big ottoman in the center of Finn’s massive closet, I rest my chin on my knee and study my toes, now painted scarlet red. “I need to find a studio.”

Finn’s condo has three bedrooms, and he’d suggested I use one. But the room isn’t big enough and the light is all wrong. Never mind the fact that I cannot violate his privacy by bringing clients in here. This space is his sanctuary, and though his willingness to offer it to me speaks volumes about his trust, I won’t let him make that sacrifice. I need a separate work space that I can comfortably bring people to.

Not for the first time, a pang of longing for my loft hits me. I breathe through it.

“I’ve been looking at a few places, but haven’t found the right space yet.” Most of them are out of my price range. Finn doesn’t want me to pay rent, but I can’t agree to that. The argument is ongoing and stubborn on both sides.

“You’ll find something,” James says.

“I miss my place.” I hadn’t meant to say so, but the words are out anyway. “At least the work space set up.”

James is silent. “Have you told Finn? Maybe talk about finding some place new?”

Shrugging, I wiggle my toes. “We just officially got together. Asking him to move would be a total Psycho Sally play.”

He laughs. “Yes, but he asked you to move in with him. If you’re not happy there, it will show.”

Happy. My mind drifts, pulling up the image of Finn in bed this morning, stretched out on his back, all long lines, tight planes, and amber skin. He’d been warm and loose-limbed with sleep, the scent of sex and pheromones a seductive fragrance I couldn’t ignore.