“I’d like to start by talking about it,” he said.

“How did this happen?” she asked.

He shook his head. “It’s not like we screwed up, Sierra. You were on the pill.”

“Maybe I got befuddled with all that was going on. I missed a couple, so I took them when I remembered and not at the same time every day. But I thought we were good.”

“It’s okay. This is a good thing.”

“Sam is only six months old yet and here I am—”

“We’re going to be busy,” he said.

“We’re going to do this?” she asked. “Are you saying we should do this?”

“Come here, Sierra,” he said. “Come on, honey.”

She went to him and he enfolded her with Sam into those big fireman’s arms, kissing her cheeks and eyes. He drew her backward until he was sitting on the edge of the bed, Sierra on his lap and Sam on hers. “I’m saying we should do this. I’m saying it’s ours, it came out of us, came out of our lovemaking, came out of our love for each other. It wasn’t planned, it’s going to be inconvenient, but we can manage. Lucky for us, we can manage.”

“But you agreed, the risk of schizophrenia...”

“I agreed that if you found having children a little too frightening given your father’s disease, I can live with that. But see this little guy right here? Our little guy? He came out of a smashed car. There are a lot of risks, honey. Parents have to be brave, strong and smart. I think we’re up to it.”

“Oh, Connie, I’ll worry all the time. Not only is there mental illness in the family, but addiction!”

“I think the last statistics I read, addiction touches every family. Thank goodness you’re an expert on it. So, don’t be afraid. We’re going to raise Sam and he’s going to have a little brother or sister.”

“I told you,” she said. “You’re taking a big chance on me.”

“I don’t regret it one bit,” he said. “You feel like shit sometimes because you’re pregnant. You’ve had morning sickness and you’re fatigued. You’re going to have a few more complaints along the way, too. But all in all, it’s going to be awesome. I love you.”

“You are too good,” she said, stroking his cheek.

“Apparently I really am too good,” he said, grinning. “I blew right through birth control pills and nailed an egg.”

“Please don’t get all cocky,” she said.

“Too late. I’m feeling very invincible right now.”

“Now what?” she asked.

“Now I think we convince Sam to take a little nap and get busy.”

“But I’m pregnant!”

“I hear it’s even better that way.”

“Well, me getting accidentally pregnant sure hasn’t diminished your sex drive!”

“It has not.”

“I don’t think he’s ready for a nap,” she said.

Sam yawned so big his open mouth almost swallowed up his face. He put his fist in his mouth and his head on Connie’s shoulder. “That’s my son,” Connie said. “He’ll be asleep by the time I get my boots off.”

Sierra took the baby to his room. “I’m not sure I’m in the mood,” she said as she was leaving.

“That’s my favorite part,” Connie said. “Getting you in the mood.”

Love...is an able master; he teaches us to be

what we never were before.

—MOLIÈRE

16

DAKOTA WAS EXPERIENCING an existence of calm and peace that he’d never really had before, at least not for days and weeks on end. Nothing about the Army had been peaceful, even though there was much about it he had loved. Even his most blissful days with Hasnaa were overshadowed by the challenges of their cultural differences; they had not come even close to figuring out how they were going to manage to be together long-term. She would never give up her work and he wasn’t sure what he’d do without the Army.

But as August arrived, life had never seemed more settled. Sedona was back home in Connecticut, in the hands of a good doctor, sleeping at night. “Sometimes during the day, as well,” she said with a touch of laughter in her voice. “And counseling up the nose—Bob and me, individual, group. I’m so overloaded with counseling I couldn’t even begin to tell you if it’s working.”

But she felt all right. There was no panic in her voice.

Sierra was looking forward to the court appearance at the end of the month that would settle their adoption of Sam. Elizabeth was pulling herself up on the furniture and had four teeth in the front of her mouth. They looked huge when she smiled. Sully had come to think of Sierra as another daughter. It wasn’t so long ago, when Maggie was single, that he’d thought he’d never experience the joy of grandparenthood. Now here he was with a little one on each knee.

The happiness Dakota found when he was able to spend time with Sid soothed his soul. When he made love to her, it rocked his world.

He picked Sid up at her house early on Saturday evening. They went together to the soup kitchen, something he particularly looked forward to. The other volunteers had become friends, even though there was no socializing outside of their volunteer night. And he’d grown a fierce admiration for Sister Mary Jacob, who put so much energy into caring for others.

“Why couldn’t you be my mother, Mary Jacob?”

“The pope forbade it,” she slung back easily.

Dakota and Sid were sharing a laugh over Sierra’s recent shock and Connie’s puffed-up excitement as they walked into the food hall. Before they even got to their aprons, they spotted a familiar face. Neely. Smiling beautifully. Positioned behind the pan of potatoes with a spoon in her hand.

“Oh. My. God,” Sid said.

“That’s it,” Dakota said. “That’s no accident!”

“It can’t be. I’ll talk to Sister,” Sid said, heading for the kitchen.

Dakota just stood there inside the door for a moment and then he followed Sid. By the time he found them having a private talk in the corner, he picked up the words stalking and vandalism.

“You think this woman is bad news, Dakota?” Sister Mary Jacob asked.

“Definitely. She accused me of assaulting her when nothing could be a bigger lie. According to people who have known her, she lies quite a bit. If her lips are moving, you should suspect something. I’m afraid we’re not going to stay. Sid has Friday, Saturday and Sunday off—put us on another night.”

“The Saturday night crowd are your friends. I’ll move her. We’ll get by without you tonight. We have enough people to serve and clean up. I’ll see you both next weekend.”

“I don’t know if she’s crazy or just determined and obsessed. You better be careful,” Dakota warned.

“Don’t worry about me,” Mary Jacob said. “I have friends in high places.”

“That almost makes me want to stay, hearing you say that. You can’t just rely on prayer.”

“You naive boy,” she said. “I know karate. And I know the police chief. She’s not going to give me any trouble. I’m a nun, for God’s sake.”

Not that anyone would know it by looking at her.

“If anything goes strange with her, call us,” Dakota said.

“Absolutely. We’ll see what happens when I schedule her on another night. You two, go on. I’ll tell the others you had something come up. Suddenly.”

“I might not be available next week,” Sid said. “I have a few things to do out of town.”

Dakota shot her a look. She’d been saying she hoped to spend a few days at her old job, helping out her former boss with something, but they hadn’t talked specific dates. He was secretly hoping it just wouldn’t happen.

“Don’t worry about it, we’ll get by. Go now. Before we draw a crowd.”

Dakota said hello to a couple of people in the kitchen, shook a couple of hands, made some excuses and promised to see them later. “Let’s go,” he said, taking Sid’s elbow to steer her out. He made it a point not to look back at Neely. He wondered how the hell she found out about the soup kitchen.

He drove away. “Let’s get closer to home and get a drink. How about that?”

“I’ll have a glass of wine,” she said. “Maybe two, since you’re driving. Jesus, that’s so disturbing.”

“I just don’t get it,” he said.

“Me, either. Look, I think you’re a hunk. But seriously? What’s she going to do with you when she gets you?” Sid pondered aloud. “You’re mad as hell! This doesn’t have happily-ever-after for her stamped on it!”

“This is a first for me,” he said. “So—you’ve made travel plans?”

“I’ve been talking to Rob about it but hadn’t nailed anything down. But, seeing Neely at the soup kitchen, I think now is an excellent time for me to take that trip. And it would give me peace of mind if you’d agree to stay with Cal while I’m gone. I don’t want to think of you alone at the cabin.”

“I’m armed.”

“Even more reason. Cody, I don’t want to even imagine you shooting someone!”

“I hate to break it to you, but in wars—”

“I know, but this isn’t that. Yes,” she said. “We’re at an interesting juncture. A crossroads. This is the time for me to look at my past and see if I can reconcile it. And maybe decide where to go from here. You should do the same. Then we should talk about what will happen next with us.”

“Together?” he asked hopefully. “Are we going to talk about where we go together? Because I’m not ready to give you up.”

“We’ll work this out. And we should figure out what to do about Neely! This has to stop.”

“I’ll call Stan tomorrow.”