Page 45

“Our house, I bet. And Lisa is working today. These kids are like little petri dishes, just breeding germs. And sharing them! I bet Lisa and I will have it by the end of the week.”

“Extra vitamin C for you,” she said.

Between patients she sat in her office, door closed, to think. Eleanor knocked on the door, poked her head in and asked if she was feeling all right. “I’m fine, thanks for asking. Sorry I’m a little cranky. I didn’t sleep well last night.”

“Maybe we can get you out of here a little early so you can have a nap.”

“If possible, that works for me.”

She was thinking about Helen and forcing herself to have a more pure memory. She remembered going out on a date—with Johnny, of course—and coming home at midnight to a dimly lit house with the glow of the computer screen and the sound of clicking keys. Sometimes that computer was active past midnight and again when Leigh got out of bed in the morning. Did Helen love her writing? Certainly! Was she scrambling to make money because she wanted Leigh to go to college without depending on too many student loans? Absolutely.

She remembered Helen nodding off on the sofa with a book in her lap and thinking, Well, at her age... At her age? She worked two jobs until Leigh was twenty-eight and had finished her residency. All those years of Leigh’s growing up, Helen worked all the time. Then three things happened—Leigh finished school and began working, at a handsome salary in a Chicago ER. Helen’s books became popular—most of them bestsellers. And Helen could retire with a pension. Yet she kept writing three to four books a year.

Helen still worked every day. Every day. Some days were shorter than others, but it was still every day. And sometimes it showed on her that she was tired. She would say her brain was soft from the work.

And I assumed she would become my babysitter, taking care of my baby while I worked. I am the devil.

Eleanor tapped on the door and opened it, holding a brown paper bag. “Someone from the pub brought this and dropped it off. Did you order something?”

“No. What have you got?”

“I didn’t look. Here you go.”

Leigh opened the bag and saw a plastic take-out carton that appeared to hold half a club sandwich and salad. There was a note on top. Just want to make sure you and the baby get lunch. Can I take you to dinner tonight? Rob.

“He is the sweetest man,” Eleanor said dreamily, closing the office door.

“Sweetest,” she said, opening the plastic container and biting into the sandwich. Her favorite—turkey club with bacon and avocado.

Her mind was very much on Helen as she kept doing the math. Helen had been a teacher in Naperville for six years and had just purchased a small house in a respectable neighborhood when her younger sister showed up on her doorstep, pregnant, and moved right in. Leigh thought about what it would have been like in her world had a younger sister moved into her house. Leigh, in her first job as an ER doctor, getting the worst hours, could not have taken on a pregnant eighteen-year-old, then a baby that cried all the time. She could not have come home from work and taken on an infant, helping with those night feedings and floor walking.

When her mother was gone and it was just Leigh and Helen, she sat at the kitchen table coloring or doing spelling words while her aunt graded papers until bedtime. She went with her aunt to every gathering of friends, the little tagalong, because there wasn’t money for sitters and Leigh only stayed behind if the Hollidays could take her for the evening.

Leigh tried to imagine her daughter; she tried to imagine spending thirty years being her mother, best friend and financial support and then having her daughter pregnant and expecting that Leigh, at the age of sixty-four, would agree to devote another thirty years to raising the next one.

She texted Rob that she hadn’t slept well and was tired. She asked if they could stay in. He texted back: If I promise to get you home early, can you give me a couple of hours? I have something to show you.

Then, as an afterthought, she thanked him for the lovely lunch. She felt like she should be punished for the way she’d been behaving.

She thought maybe a little walk and breath of fresh air might help even her mood, plus she could stop by the pub and get a few seconds of Rob’s time to ask where he wanted to go and what time she should be ready. And she realized she hadn’t even told him that yesterday she felt the baby move.

She was almost to the pub when she glanced across the street and there, in front of the beauty shop, was Johnny Holliday in what looked like a very private conversation with Alyssa, the beautician. She was leaning against the wall between the shops and he was leaning against her. His face was close to hers and he casually toyed with her beautiful long hair with one hand while the other was braced against the wall. The sight surprised her so much she stopped walking and just stared.

Then she laughed. Had she really let the memory of this faithless man-child create doubt in her mind about Rob Shandon? And that was just one of her many ridiculous notions in the past couple of months.

She went into the pub. She saw the assistant manager, Kathleen, behind the bar and that’s when she remembered Sid and Dakota had moved to Boulder where she would be teaching and Dakota would be a student. And she hadn’t even said goodbye.

She asked Kathleen if Rob was around.

“He stepped out. He said he had errands. He didn’t say what, but he’s taking Finn to Boulder this weekend and it’ll be a big move. When we took our daughter to college, we nearly had to rent a trailer for her shoes! Boys aren’t as bad, I think. But still...”

This weekend. She’d been thinking about other things. This was an important milestone for Finn and she’d hardly given it a thought. She was going to have to get him a special send-off gift.

It was high time she stopped thinking only of herself. She thanked Kathleen and hurried back to the clinic. The waiting room had only two people and she looked at her watch. “Do I have a few minutes?” she asked Eleanor.

“Sure. They both have appointments for after one. Take your time.”

She hurried to her office and called Helen’s cell. “Auntie,” she said. “Have you landed somewhere? Are you in San Francisco?”

“Actually, when I came to the Crossing to say goodbye to Sully, he convinced me to stay. So I’m not far away if you have a crisis. Please don’t have a crisis. I’m feeling very tired.”

“Auntie, I’m so sorry. Can you forgive me?”

“I’m not angry with you, sweetheart. There’s no apology necessary. But I’m glad I came out to Sully’s. This is what I want.”

“I was being so selfish,” Leigh said. “Of course you should do whatever feels right. I just want you to know, I’m sorry.”

“Listen, we argued for a long time but a couple of things were left unsaid that I want to be clear about. I will always be there for you. Should some disaster befall you and your options are few, I will always devote myself to your welfare and to the baby. And I’m very anxious for the baby. I’m becoming a grandmother. Watching Sully with his little ones when they’re here makes me so happy. I look forward to helping with the baby. Just remember, I have a job. I also have a relationship and my own life.”

“I should have been thinking about that from the beginning. I’m so glad you’re only as far as the Crossing so I can see you often. Helen, I’ve been a real idiot lately. I hope I haven’t always been that self-centered.”

Helen laughed. “You are not that way, sweetheart. You’ve always been a generous and giving person. I’m sure a lot about a surprise pregnancy makes a person panic and get a little crazy.”

“You have no idea. I’m embarrassed on a lot of fronts right now. But I have patients waiting. I’ll talk to you a little later.”

“Would you like to join Sully and me for dinner?” Helen asked.

“I’m sorry, I can’t. Rob wants to take me somewhere. And he promised to get me home early—I’m completely worn out! Let’s never do that again. If I overstep, just hold up a hand and tell me I’ve gone too far!”

“I’m sure that won’t be necessary.”

“Aunt Helen, I took you for granted,” she said softly. “I remember how hard you worked, how much you did for me.”

“It was the joy of my life,” Helen said. “And now I take credit for you. And the other thing that was left unsaid. I love Mr. Sullivan. He makes me happy. And my books terrify him—it’s the most perfect relationship.”

Leigh laughed. “I love him, too,” she said. “Who doesn’t love Sully?”

“Go back to work, Leigh. No worries. But I think maybe it did us a favor. We both need to move on in a more positive direction. I’m glad you pushed me. I dreaded telling you.”

“You did?” she asked.

“I did. I could tell that, even though I was spending almost every day and most evenings with Sully, you had no idea...”

“You’re right. I knew you had a special friendship. I didn’t know it was that special.”

“It’s that special,” Helen said. “Now get back to work and let’s talk later.”

“I love you, Auntie.”

Leigh sighed heavily. Thank God for Helen. She was so reasonable. So thoughtful. And now, so much in love.

She stood from her desk and opened her office door to signal that she was ready to see patients and who should be standing there with his hand raised to knock but Rob. She jumped in surprise.

“You startled me,” she said. “Why are you here?”

“I went to the pub and Kathleen said you were looking for me. You all right?”

“Excellent. I just wondered what time we’re going out and what I should wear. I was going to text you but there’s been a lot going on.”

“Casual and as soon as you’re out of here and can change. Will you text me when you’re home and let me know how much time you need to change?”