“Emily O’Connell,” the clerk called out in a clear voice, and we all stood.

“I don’t fuckin’ like this, Em; you’re my wife. You shouldn’t have to face Frank alone. I should be with you.”

“You will be,” she said and kissed me.

Chapter 16

Apart from the hour they had for lunch, during which neither of them really spoke, Em and Danny were both in that courtroom all day. When they came out, Danny looked devastated, and Em just looked vacant. If it had gone badly, I expected tears or at least a boatload of hugs. But it was like she’d completely shut down.

“How did it go?” I asked.

“Oh, fine,” she said. I went to pull her in for a hug. Fuck knows I needed it but she moved out of the way, telling me she needed the bathroom. Once she’d gone, I turned to Danny.

“What the fuck is going on?” I asked him. Looking every single one of his years, he sat dejectedly on the bench in the foyer.

“It was an absolute bloodbath. She did amazing giving her evidence. Held it all together. When the defense examined her, they tore her apart though. I think that, with the rape kit, they would have gone easier, maybe tried to paint Frank in a different light. Without it, it’s his word against theirs so they’re basically calling Em a liar. A trouble-making teenager who saw this as an opportunity to split up her parents. Their version of events is that she was raped at a house party where she dressed provocatively, and that she tried to pin it on Frank. She answered all their questions but the defense painted a pretty graphic picture of what they think happened.”

“Fuck!” Kieran muttered but I was still in shock that it could have gone down that way.

“Didn’t the judge step in?” I asked.

“Not his place to. Defense has a right to cross-examine,” he countered.

“What about your evidence? What about the kidnapping?” He held his flat cap tightly between his hands and looked down at the floor.

“They still don’t know the address of the flat he took her to. It’s probably where he left her rings. The only physical evidence tying him to the kidnapping are the prints on the knife in her chest. He claims he was on a fishing trip when she was taken, Em’s mum eventually got hold of him, explained what happened, and he came straight to the gym to see if he could help. He told police that, when he arrived, she was already on the floor with the knife in her chest. He touched it and her as he assessed her wounds, then ran off to get help, which is when he says he was picked up. I know Em said he made some calls from the flat but it was probably on a prepaid burner phone. Either it’s at the flat or he dumped it before he got picked up.”

“What about your testimony?” Liam asked him.

“They did the same to me that they did to her. They must ’ave done a background check on me. Me da was a nasty drunk who killed me sister. He ran off when she died and he was never caught. Lawyers brought it up and my relationship with Em, saying I wasn’t above lying for Em to get the justice for her that my sister never had. By the time they were done, I didn’t sound like a very credible witness.”

“What does that mean? Does he get away with this?” Tommy asked, clearly as pissed off as we all were.

“I think it’s all gonna come down to her ma’s evidence tomorrow. Our barrister says if she tells the jury what she told Em, we got a chance at a conviction. If she sides with Frank over her own daughter, the barrister thinks he’ll walk.”

I ran my hands through my hair wildly as my thoughts crashed together in my head. What would I do to Frank if he got out? How would Em ever move forward from this if he was loose? How much time would I go down for making him a fucking cripple?

Kieran grabbed me roughly and pulled me to one side. “No! You don’t get to fucking do this! You had your moment of meltdown. Now you have to pull your shit together and get your head out of your arse. Sunshine needs you now more than ever. This ain’t about you, it’s about her. He gets off, we’ll deal with it but not now.”

He looked around to see Em heading back. I nodded to indicate that I was keeping it together, and he squeezed my shoulder before letting go. We walked the short distance to all the cars, the tension so thick you could cut it with a knife. Em’s little hand trembled in mine, and I didn’t know how someone so tiny, who’d been through so much, could be so strong. She made me seem like a fucking pussy.

“Liam,” I spoke to him from the back of the car, “could you take us to our house?”

“That’s where I’m going,” he replied in confusion.

“Not the flat. Our house.” Understanding dawned on him, and he nodded his head as he made the detour. Sunshine continued to stare out of the window like she hadn’t heard a word I said. When we arrived, she followed me out of the car on autopilot, stopping only when we reached the front door. Coming around from wherever her head had been, she looked at me funny.

“What are we doing here?” she asked.

“Just checking out the place, seeing how the work is going,” I answered.

The others had all headed home except for Liam and Kieran who sat up in the front of Liam’s truck. I knew they weren’t going anywhere until we were ready to leave. I opened the door and sidestepped past the tools so Em could follow. Even from a quick glance around, you could see that Liam had been busy. Once we’d gutted it, the place was a blank canvas. Now pretty much all the trades were hard at work. Wires hung loose ready to be connected to light fittings, gas pipes stuck out from the walls ready to connect to radiators. The house was a mess, but definitely a work in progress. Em stayed silent as we walked from room to room. When we got to the smallest bedroom, I recognized a couple of Liam’s toolboxes and, sitting down on one, pulled her hand to sit down opposite me.

“Danny tell you what happened?” she asked me.

I nodded in reply. “I’m so sorry, love,” I said. “I don’t know what to say.”

“I know you want to make this right. You want to fix me. I’d want exactly the same for you if our roles were reversed. But I’m not the same person I was a year ago. Being cross-examined was like being raped all over again. Only this time they all know. The science even told them I was telling the truth, and still they don’t believe me. I’m different than I was then, though. I feel dirty and abused. I want a shower so hot it’ll boil my skin, and when we’re curled up in bed later, I’ll want a good cry. But when that’s all done, I won’t run and hide. I won’t be the little mouse to his big, fat cat. This time I have you and Danny and the rest of my family. So today is going to be shitty, and tomorrow is probably going to be worse, but we’ll get through it.”