Page 47

"No! I just told you I only heard from him today."

"How convenient." He pushes past me roughly and heads downstairs with me following after him in confusion. He's been somewhat agitated the past few days, but nothing like this.

"I don't want you to be mad at me." I grab his shoulder. "Please?"

"Mad doesn't even touch what I'm feeling right now. You have no fucking idea." He shrugs my hand off and won't even look at me.

"I'm sorry." Through the foyer window, I see the limo pulling up in front of the house. He notices too and shakes his head in frustration.

"Perfect fucking timing." He rubs his hand against the side of his head. "My head is killing me."

"Let me get you something for it…" I cross the foyer and enter the kitchen, grabbing him a few ibuprofen from the cabinet and a glass I fill with filtered water.

"You're getting a lot of headaches lately," I comment, handing the glass and pills to him.

"This crap from you isn't helping." He downs the pills and water and hands the glass back to me, seemingly oblivious to how I wince at the unexpected harshness of his words. "And I don't have time to hash this ex shit out with you right now. Do whatever you gotta do, okay? I don't own you. If you've got unresolved issues, then resolve them. I don't know what else to even say."

He picks up his bags again and opens the front door, leaving without saying good-bye. I watch him from the doorway, tempted to chase after him. I should. Instead, I watch him walk to the limo, his head tilted oddly to the side. A cold sense of dread comes over me, and it roots me to the doorway. I wave to him while tears fall down my cheeks as the limo backs out of the driveway. The tinted windows shadow him, not letting me see if he waved back.

I want to slap myself as I close the door behind me and stand in our beautiful foyer with my back leaning against the heavy wooden door.

What the hell was I thinking? Why did this seem like a totally acceptable idea until I actually verbalized it? Somehow I had rationalized and justified this idea of confronting Danny in my head in my desperate need to hold someone accountable for abandoning me without explanation. Instead, all I did is upset my husband and make him think I wanted to go on a date with another man while he was out of town.

Grabbing the house phone, I curl up on the couch and dial Kat's number, hoping she's home.

"Hey," she answers.

"Kat…" My voice cracks. "I think I messed up. Like bad."

"Uh-oh. That doesn't sound good at all. What's going on?"

"I'm a total idiot. Danny texted me this morning and asked if we could meet and talk—"

"Danny the Doofus?" she interrupts.

"Yes."

"What the hell does he want after all this time?"

"Exactly. That's what I wanted to know. He asked if I could meet him for coffee, and I kinda wanted to, just to get some answers out of him. I mean, he left. He never really gave me a reason why he wanted to end things."

"Because he's a jackass, that's why. End of story."

"Well, yeah. But for once, I wanted to hear someone tell me why they left me. That's all, Kat. I only wanted an explanation, to my face, as to why I am so easy to leave."

"Oh, Asia," she says softly. "I know you feel that way, but honestly, it's not you. You have been surrounded by assholes your whole life. But now you have me and Talon and his family, and we all really care about you."

I choke as I start to cry. "I really pissed Talon off, Kat. He left for his tour without even saying good-bye. I've never seen him so mad and upset."

"Shit, Asia. You told him you were thinking of going to see Danny?"

"Yeah…"

"Why would you do that? You're married now. Of course, he's pissed. He loves you."

"He's never once said he loves me, Kat. Not once."

She sighs into the phone, and I can hear her pouring what is probably wine into a glass. "Trust me, girl. That man loves you. No words needed. Stop being so stupid."

"Christ, Kat. Thanks a lot."

"Sorry, but really. I'm gonna have to take his side on this one, and it's not because I don't love you—because I do. But you need a bitch-slap right now. You love him. He loves you. I don't care who did or didn't say it. It's obvious to everyone you guys are crazy for each other. You don't tell your husband you're going to see your ex. Ever. I can't believe you would even consider it. This is very unlike you. You finally have everything you've ever wanted. Who the hell cares what Danny has to say? He's a loser."

"I don't know. Like I said, I just wanted an answer. You don't know what it feels like, Kat. My entire family left me. And then Danny. I wanted someone to finally give me a reason. I don't want Danny back at all. I love Talon more than I ever thought possible. He drives me crazy, but I love him."

"Please, Asia. Let this stuff go. Forget Danny and his stupid reasons. It's not important. What is important is you have Talon in your life now, regardless of how he got there. And I do not think he is ever going to leave, even if he is pissed off right now. Pull your head out of your ass, go take a nice bath, give him some time to cool off, and then call him and tell him you're sorry."

I take a deep breath and wipe at my face. "I'm going to. I hate that I made him so mad. Things were going really great. He hasn't been feeling well the past few days and that has him edgy, but other than that, we've been good."

"Do you need to talk to Dr. H? This sounds serious. Especially this abandonment you feel."

"No, I don't want to get her involved in this. Ugh. I hate this part of our relationship, having to tell someone else our personal problems. I'll put it in my journal, though. Hopefully, he won't mention this to her, either."

"Soon, this part will be over and you won't be under a microscope anymore. But, it's good you have someone to help you when you need it. Maybe all marriages should come with a counselor for the first six months."

"That's probably not a bad idea, actually. She has been helpful in some ways, to be honest. But this, I don't want to get into it with her. I know it was stupid of me, and I want to fix it with him myself."

"When is he coming home?"

"Not for like ten days. I'm going to miss him like crazy."

"Why didn't you go with him? I thought you said he asked if you could?"

"Well, I can't leave Pixie alone, and I hate to leave her with other people or a pet sitter. She gets all upset and sometimes stops eating, as you know. Plus, I have so many orders for soaps now, on top of those for custom clothes. It's taken off like you can't believe. The girls from Sugar Kiss all have me making their clothes now. I can't fill the orders if I'm on a bus with him, and I don't want all these projects piling up and getting behind. I'll lose credibility. Famous people aren't exactly patient. He was upset that I said no, though."

"I think everything will be fine once you apologize."

"I really hope so. We've never had a fight like this."

"Rob and I are narrowing down a date."

"Oh my God, finally?"

"Yup. Probably in the next six months."

"I thought you said you wanted to wait until you were thirty?"

"I did… But I think he's the one. So we're talking about maybe getting married next summer."

"Kat, I am so incredibly happy for you. I really like Rob. He's perfect for you." I've liked Rob since the first day I met him. He's good-looking, has a great job, is an amazing single dad to his six-year-old son he has sole custody of, and treats Kat like a queen. He's definitely one of the good guys. "I think you two are going to be really happy together. And Mark loves you as if you are his own mother."

"Yeah, I was a little worried about getting involved with a single dad and becoming an instant mom, but I really love them both. You're going to be my maid of honor, so you better get mentally prepared for it."

"Gladly. I can't wait."

"I better run. We're meeting his parents for dinner actually, and I'm still sitting here in yoga pants. Are you okay? Do you think you can smooth this out with Talon?"

"I think so. I'm going to have to admit to him I was being totally stupid."

"If he needs a reference, have him call me."

"Ha-ha. Have a great night."

"You too, babe. Text me later and let me know if everything's okay."

After I end the call with Kat, I send Talon a text message.

Me: I'm so sorry. I'm not going to see him.

About ten minutes later I receive a reply.

Talon: You can do whatever you need to do.

Me: I didn't want to see him at all, I just wanted answers. I realize now it's not important. I don't know what I was thinking.

Talon: Me neither.

Me: I don't like you being mad at me when you're gone.

Talon: Why? Afraid I might see other women like you want to see other men?

Shit. He is completely pissed off.

Me: Yes. That and because I miss you and I don't want us mad at each other. And I don't want to see other men.

Talon: It seems like you have some thinking to do. I made up my mind when I married you that I didn't want other women. Not to see, not to fuck, not to party with. I gave up all of it and I've never regretted it. Even when chicks throw themselves at me, I don't even consider it anymore. I walk away.

Me: That's totally different. He's someone I had a relationship with.

Talon: That makes it way fucking worse to me. You told me you loved him. Which BTW you've never said to me.

Oh, fuck. I can't tell him I love him now, not in the middle of this crap. He'll think I'm just saying it to appease him.

Me: That was a long time ago. I only wanted an explanation as to why he just left me. I don't have feelings for him. At all.