She bit her lower lip, squared her shoulders and raised her chin. “Goodbye, Wyatt.”

Then she was gone. She told him she loved him and she’d left anyway. They all left, so he was used to it. But this was the first time he would be sorry.

“YOU HAVE TO PROMISE,” Amy signed.

“I promise,” Claire told her, then hugged her. “I’ll be back for your surgery.”“I want to hear your music.”

“You will.” Claire straightened and hugged Nicole. “Are you sure you’re going to be all right by yourself? I worry about you.”

“I’m fine,” her sister told her. “I’m practically breaking land-speed records on my crutches. I’m going back to work where I can terrorize my staff. It will be fun. I’ll barely notice you’re gone.”

But there were tears in Nicole’s eyes as she spoke. Probably like the tears Claire could feel burning in her own.

“I hate this,” she muttered.

“It’s the right thing to do. Just don’t stay gone long.”

“I won’t. I love you.”

“I love you more.”

“Unlikely.”

“Don’t argue,” Nicole sniffed. “I’m two minutes older.”

Claire nodded, then hugged Amy again. “I love you.”

Amy started to cry, then signed that she loved Claire.

“This is crazy,” Claire muttered as she straightened. “We’re all going to be puffy. We have to stop.”

“You have to go. Call me when you land.”

“It’ll be four in the morning.”

“I don’t care. Call me.”

“I will.”

Claire got into her rental car and started the engine. Still fighting tears, she headed for the freeway, then the airport. She was catching a late-evening flight to New York. Back home, she thought. Except she was leaving her heart in Seattle, so how could anywhere else ever be home?

WYATT PUT DOWN his empty beer bottle. “I don’t know what to do.”

“Don’t ask me,” Drew told him from across the table in the bar. “I know shit about women. I lost Nicole.”“That was your own damn fault.”

“And this isn’t yours?”

Wyatt didn’t like that his stepbrother was actually making sense. It was his fault that Claire had asked him to sign away his parental rights. Why would she think he would care about their baby? He’d done nothing but accuse her of trying to trap him and complain about what a disaster the pregnancy was.

“I needed more time,” he muttered.

“To do what?” Drew asked. “Nothing’s going to change.”

He might. A baby. He’d never thought of having another child. He had Amy and she was everything to him. What child could be more?

That was his head talking, he reminded himself. In his heart, he knew he could love another kid. Maybe more. But he’d never let himself go there because he hadn’t believed it could ever work out. His relationships with women were always disasters. It was his genetics at play.

He looked at Drew. “How’d you get someone like Nicole to fall for you?”

“I don’t have a clue.”

“Why’d you cheat on her?”

Drew shrugged. “Jesse was always there, prancing around in her little clothes.”

“I don’t believe it.”

Drew took another long drink of his beer. “I couldn’t be what Nic wanted me to be. I kept seeing disappointment in her eyes. She never said anything, but it was there. I couldn’t stand it.”

“So you decided to disappoint her more?”

“I don’t know. I’m just telling you what I was thinking when I tried to screw Jesse.”

Wyatt wanted to dismiss Drew’s words, but he knew what his brother was talking about. He’d seen the same disappointment in Claire’s eyes when he hadn’t been happy about the baby.

“She told me it can be like it never happened,” Wyatt said.

“The baby? So that’s good.”

“I can’t walk away from my kid.”

“Then you have a problem.”

Worse, he wasn’t sure he could walk away from Claire.

“I could almost see myself with her,” he mumbled.

Drew signaled for another beer. “That proposal will make her heart beat faster.”

“You know what I mean. I’ve never been able to see myself with anyone.” He finished his beer. “Who am I kidding? It’ll never happen.”

“That’s bullshit and you know it,” Drew told him. “It’s an excuse not to try. No one else in this family has ever been able to hold a job for more than a year. You’ve got a business. You’re raising a great kid. Do you really believe you can’t have a decent marriage?”

Wyatt nearly fell off his chair. “Are you being insightful again?”

“Yeah, don’t tell anyone. It doesn’t happen all that often. Look, Wyatt, you’ve stood by me when no one else would. You’ve given me a job and you didn’t kill me when I cheated on Nicole. I don’t have what you have. I lost her. I know that. But you still have a chance. Don’t be an idiot.”

“Words to live by,” Wyatt muttered, then stood. “I gotta make a call.”

He walked out into the cool night and pulled out his cell phone.

“It’s me,” he said when Nicole answered. “I need to talk to Claire and don’t tell me I can’t. This isn’t your business.”

“I agree, but you still can’t talk to her. She’s not here. She left a couple of hours ago.”

He went very still. “For where.”

“New York.”

He couldn’t believe it. “She left without saying goodbye?”

“You made it clear you didn’t want to have anything to do with her. She believed you. The fact that she left shouldn’t be a surprise at all, Wyatt. It’s what you wanted.”

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

CLAIRE LEFT the practice studio shortly after one. It was a perfect early-summer day—sunny, but not too warm. She considered getting a cab, but decided the walk would be good for both her and the baby.

She’d been in New York about two weeks and was surprised at how easily she’d slipped back into her old routine. Practice every morning, lessons a couple of times a week, then meetings with Lisa. They were still putting together the fall tour and deciding which CDs she wanted to be on. The two for charity, of course, but there were other artists who had interesting ideas Claire wanted to explore.She’d had her first doctor’s appointment the previous week and had been pronounced perfectly healthy. She was eating well, sleeping great. Life was good…or it should have been. Despite the fact that she hadn’t had a single panic attack or even a hint of one, despite Lisa acting like they were partners and actually listening, despite having everything she’d always said she wanted, she felt…wrong.

It was as if nothing would come completely into focus. No matter how she turned her head or squinted, she was missing something just out of view.

The music was great. She loved the music. She’d asked Lisa to find her somewhere to play over the summer so she could make sure she’d really chased away her demons. There was a charity concert in a little more than a week, which was exciting. But still not enough.

She paused by the newsstand. “Hi, Billy.”

The old man looked up. “It didn’t come today, Claire. I called around and found it for you, though.” He gave her an address. “Ike there is holding you a copy.”

“You’re the best.”

“I know.” He grinned. “That’s why you women can’t get enough of me.”

She hurried down three blocks and over one to the newsstand he’d suggested. After introducing herself to Ike, she took the copy of the Seattle Times he held out and gave him five dollars.

“Keep the change.”

“Oh, sure, now I know why Billy likes you so much.”

Claire laughed. “You mean it’s not my dazzling smile?”

“I’m sure that helps. Have a good day.”

“You, too.”

Claire found a Starbucks, ordered a decaf latte, then settled in the corner with the paper.

It was silly, she knew. Yet she felt compelled to find out what was happening in Seattle. As always, she read a few articles, then turned to the real estate section and looked at houses for sale.

“I’m just daydreaming,” she reminded herself. But if she were buying a house, it would be relatively close to Nicole’s without getting in the way. She’d want a big deck and maybe a view. Lots of trees and a basement. A yard for kids.

She sighed when she realized she was describing Wyatt’s house. The house she couldn’t forget, owned by the man she still loved.

Had he already moved on? Did he think of her at all? Did she haunt him the way he haunted her? Did Amy still think about her? She missed the little girl nearly as much as she missed Wyatt.

Everything was different now, she reminded herself. A few short months ago she’d been practically agoraphobic, hiding out in her apartment, terrified of everything. She’d been alone. Today she had her life back and so many people she loved. She also had a baby. She’d been lucky and blessed…so why wasn’t it enough? Why did she want the one man she couldn’t have and how was she supposed to fall out of love with him?

“Am I interrupting?”

Claire looked up and saw Lisa standing by her table. “Not at all. What are you doing here?”

“This is my neighborhood. I live over there.”

She pointed to a tall building. Claire knew her manager had moved a couple of years before, but as they didn’t socialize, she’d never been to her place. Lisa always came to her.

“You seem to be settling in,” the other woman said before sipping on her coffee.

“I’m happy to be back.” Sort of. “I’ve missed playing.”

“How was practice?”

“Good. I’m working on the pieces I’ll play for the charity concert. Nothing is new, so it’s more about refreshing my memory than anything else.”

Claire wondered if her manager felt the faint sense of awkwardness between them. Despite having known each other for years, everything was different now. They were going to have to create a new relationship as they went.

Lisa glanced at the paper. “Still missing Seattle?”

“More than I thought I would.” She touched the real estate section. “I meant what I said before. I want to buy a house there.”

“What I saw of the city was very nice. And it has to be cheaper than here. Would you keep your apartment for yourself or sublet it? I suppose you could sell it, but you’ll still be coming back to New York.”

Claire didn’t realize how she’d braced herself until she began to relax. Despite their conversations and Lisa’s promise to treat her like a partner, she’d expected her manager to protest. “I don’t want to sell it,” she said. “Or sublet it.”

“You can afford to keep it for when you’re in town.” Lisa set down her coffee. “This may shock you, but I’m glad you’re making changes. I had a lot of time to think after my first visit to Seattle. I didn’t know if you were coming back or not. What with you being my only client, I panicked. What was I going to do with myself? How would I survive?”

Claire swallowed guilt. She’d never meant to leave Lisa hanging.

“I took a long look at my life.” Lisa smiled. “I’m fifty-six. I’ve never been married. I don’t even have houseplants. My life has been my clients. You for the last sixteen years, but others before. I’ve worked hard, seen the world. Many would envy my life. It does make for excellent cocktail conversation, but I’m ready for a change.”

“You’re quitting?” Claire asked, not sure how she felt about that.

“You won’t get rid of me so easily. But I am going to be taking time off. A vacation or two. Or five. According to my accountant, I don’t have to worry too much about money, even the way I shop. I’m nowhere near ready to retire, but cutting back sounds very good.” She touched Claire’s hand. “You went looking to find yourself and you did. Now it’s my turn.”

Claire liked the sound of that. She’d always been half-afraid of Lisa and for the first time, she finally saw her as a real person.

“Would you like to get dinner tonight?”

Her manager smiled. “I would. We can celebrate the changes we’re looking forward to.”

WYATT OPENED his front door to see Nicole standing on his porch, leaning on her crutches.

He hadn’t seen his friend in over a week and he’d missed her. “Tell me you didn’t drive.”“Don’t ask, don’t tell. It works for the military.”

“Nicole. You’re still recovering from surgery.”

“Did you notice it was my left knee? I drive with my right leg.” She sighed. “I don’t do it often, okay? I just wanted to see you.”

“I thought you hated me.” She’d been pretty clear on what she thought about him the last time they’d talked. And the time before.

“I thought you were a jerk. There’s a difference. That doesn’t mean we can’t be friends.”

He stepped back to let her in. As she walked past him he said, “I’ve missed you.”

She paused next to him, then turned toward him. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close.