He stiffened, and his expression was angry though not, Justine believed, because she was questioning him. Rather he was angry that she seemed to already know the answers.

“I think you’re in trouble,” she said. “I think she’s already gotten a generous share of the money you brought to your new life, and on top of that, she beats you up. I bet she’s already asking for more, isn’t she?”

“She doesn’t beat me up!” he shouted, looking particularly ominous with his black eye, split lip and scarred eyebrow.

“She hits you, Scott. And she wants your money. You need to know something. I think you’ve been used. She went after you, caught you, got some fast money out of you and will only be with you as long as you continue to feed her habit. You’re probably going to get beat up again and again, and really, you need help. Men don’t like to admit a woman is abusing them, and sometimes they stay in it too long and end up in the hospital. Or worse. I can’t help you.”

“I don’t want your help,” he said bitterly. “You don’t understand. You never needed me. You never admired me. You can’t know how that feels.”

“And so now you’re going to somehow make this my fault? That I didn’t show my appreciation quite enough? I gave you everything I had, you son of a bitch! I loved you! And I was faithful to you!”

“But it didn’t take you long to find a new man,” he chided.

She couldn’t believe he was really jealous or that shallow. “I don’t know you anymore, Scott. I think you’ve really gone around the bend. Please, be very careful. It seems you’re in a bad place. I have nothing more to say.”

“Maybe you’re in a bad place,” he taunted. “Maybe there’s an argument that you used your advantage as a lawyer to talk me out of fair representation. Maybe we should go to court.”

She sighed. Really, she had not expected this. “She wants more money, does she? You signed off, you got what the law says you were owed. If anyone was treated unfairly, it was me and the girls. We’re done here.”

She turned to leave and he said, “I can sue you.”

She looked back at him. “Good luck with that! You can sue anyone for anything, Scott. Don’t forget, I’m a lawyer. Throw away more money if you want, but I can assure you, you won’t win. I don’t owe you anything.”

And she walked away, vowing never to return to that kayak shack.

Chapter Fifteen

Adele and Jake had been spending more time together at Jake’s house since Justine and the girls moved into her space. This night they sautéed chicken breasts and vegetables with some Chinese noodles for dinner. They chose to watch Addie’s favorite holiday movie, Love Actually, even though Thanksgiving was still weeks away. She watched it every year, but Jake had never seen it. Both the dinner and the movie were a roaring success—she already knew she loved it and was pleased Jake did, as well. After they finished eating in front of the TV and retired their trays to the kitchen, Adele snuggled a little closer to Jake.

And he pulled her yet closer.

“We should have a talk,” Jake said.

“A talk?” she repeated. “Sounds serious.”

“I think it is,” he said. “I’d like to know what your plan is.”

She sat up a bit straighter. “You already know everything, Jake. I’m going to keep my current job, go to school, emerge as a counselor who can actually do some good...”

“Live in your house with your sister and nieces, have dinner with me twice a week, graduate from platonic kisses to hot kisses to weekly sex?”

She smiled at him. “I’m not opposed to that idea.”

“That’s why we have to talk. Addie, you take your sweet old time making up your mind about things. I think I’ve been on the back burner just about long enough.”

“How can you say that? I have a great job, the first one I applied for, and I’ve committed to finishing my master’s. In a new program yet!”

“You’re going to think I’m being mean, but it took you eight years.”

“Not really! I mean, in the first place I had a real serious trauma. A terrible relationship that led to a trauma. It was devastating and I admit, it took a while to recover. Then my mom.... But I always meant to get to this place!”

“So, here’s my question, Addie. What place do I have in your life?”

“Jake,” she said, shocked. “You’re my best friend! I’ve told you a million times—I don’t know what I’d do without you!”

“I like being your best friend. But I’d like a little something more.”

“Like what? Like sex?” Then she smiled at him, trying to tease him out of this mood.

“This is my fault,” he said. “I always wanted to explain myself better, to tell you how I really feel. It’s hard for me. I think it’s hard for most men, but I’m off the charts. The truth is, I want more. Maybe we don’t want any of the same things, and if that’s the case, we need to face it. I want a family. A wife and a couple of kids, but I’d be happy to have one kid.”

“Jake, you’ve never told me that before!” she said.

“There’s plenty of time but I don’t want to play games. What about you? What do you want?”

“I used to think I wanted a child. I sure wanted one once. Losing him almost killed me. Now I’m focused on having a career. I want to be able to take care of myself. That’s the one thing about Justine that I admire the most—she’s completely capable of taking care of herself.”

“You can take care of yourself, Addie. You’ve been taking care of yourself and your mom. I could promise to always take care of you, but those kinds of promises are no good. My father died young and my mom, she manages pretty well. If I wasn’t around to do the heavy lifting, she could find someone to help. What I should have said a long time ago is I love you, Addie.”

She put a hand on his arm. “I know, Jake. And that means a lot to me.”

“I don’t think you get it. I’m in love with you. I have been for years. I think it first occurred to me when you came home from Berkeley. But you were in love with someone else, and you were having a baby. Then you were so fragile and hurt. And then there was your mom. I vowed when you weren’t grieving any longer I would be more honest with you, but I guess it took me a while.”

She stared at him in shock. Through all the hours they’d shared, through the affection, the kisses and hugs, she had herself convinced it was little more than convenience. They were genuinely close friends. There was no one else for either of them, and they were, after all, adults. Buddies. Confidants.

“I thought this was the part where you cried for joy, threw your arms around me and—”

“But Jake, we’ve been friends for so long!”

“Yeah, and we can talk to each other, make each other laugh, have each other’s back. Listen, I already had the experience of loving someone I didn’t like very much, someone I wanted to trust. But I knew I was kidding myself. I’ve learned a lot since then. I want to be with someone I know deep down I trust, someone whose character I’m sure of. Someone I’ve loved for years.”

“Wow,” she said.

“Can you please do better than that?”

“I’m sorry, but something about this seems a little clinical. Like an arranged marriage. She’s got a good dowry, strong teeth and decent birthing hips.”

He grabbed her by the upper arms and pulled her toward him. Then he devoured her with his best, most powerful kiss. She’d had a few of these before and there was no question about it, he had a serious skill. She sighed when he let her go.

“Adele, you don’t fall in love with teeth or hips. You fall in love with a heart, a spirit.”

“Oh Jake,” she said, nearly swooning.

“It’s time for us to make a transition,” he said. “Well, time for me. I understood all the complications of your life and never wanted to push you. You had so much to deal with. But you’re sailing along now, and I want you to think about us.”

“I counted on us being the same forever.”

“That’s the thing. That’s not going to be enough for me. I want the real deal. I don’t want to draw a line in the sand here, but I want you to know—I want more.”

“How much more?” she asked.

“I thought that was obvious,” he said. “Here’s the thing. If you’re also in love with me, we can make plans. They don’t have to be traditional plans. But there has to be a future in this for me. If we’re just going to be friends, I’m going to do myself a favor and get on with my life. That’s not to say we won’t be friends, but I can’t be kissing you and holding you and spending all my time with you and hope to ever have a real relationship, one filled with hope and commitment. Or that family. Or the future with someone who wants a future with me. If we go on like this, someday you’re going to just say, ‘Jake, I met someone I really love.’”

“As you know, that can happen even to people with commitments,” she said. “Even to people who have been married a long time.”

“Not to everyone,” he argued. “Some people of great courage and integrity say, ‘No thank you, I have a commitment.’ And you know what happens then? They pay attention to the relationship they have with their partner and make it good if they can. Maybe that temptation goes away if they don’t feed it. That’s my bet. And if they can’t hold true, if they have to part ways, they haven’t done so because of another person.”

“I don’t even know what to say,” she said. She was acutely aware that she hadn’t said, “I love you, too.”

“Ever since you first came over here to see my house, ever since you started feeling a little crowded in your house, things between us have been heating up. I like it. I like it more than you realize. But I suggest we take a little break while you think about where you want to go with me. Because I don’t want to be your Friday night guy forever.”