Crouching down, I felt like my head was full of noise, my heart empty, as was my role in this life. Feeling Mae’s heavy stare, I looked up. Her hand lying over her forehead. “It is all going wrong. None of this is what I was raised believing. And they all look to me. They all follow my lead. And they believe that I should marry you.”

Mae’s head fell in defeat.

Delilah’s blond hair caught my attention from behind Mae. Getting to my feet, I brushed past Delilah who shuffled back against the wooden wall and cowered back in fear.

“What was done to you?” I asked. Delilah sank back and began to tremble. Looking over my shoulder to see Judah pacing outside of the mill, I knew I had limited time. “What was done to you at your trial? What happened to you on the Hill of Perdition?”

Tears ran down Delilah’s face, but then Mae said from behind, “They raped her, Cain. Over and over, before tying her to a stake and setting it alight.  They intended to burn her like a witch. Your brother gave her thirty-nine stripes, the scars from which still mar her back. In essence, Cain, they tortured her for hours, and you did nothing to stop it. You washed your hands of her and let them brutalize her, for fun, for nothing but their sadistic amusement. Our scripture does not teach what she went through. It does not even infer it.”

My eyes stayed on Delilah as Mae’s words tore me apart, and I asked, “Is that true? Is what Mae is telling me, true?” Delilah lifted her head.

“Yes,” she whispered, but I did not need to hear the answer to know it was true. I could see it in her eyes. Judah, my men, had done to her exactly what Phebe had declared to be true.

I pushed my hands through my hair and looked to Mae. Her blue eyes held nothing but pain and disappointment. “I did not know they did that. I did not declare that to be her punishment.”

Mae’s eyes fell lovingly on Delilah and she asserted, “But you did nothing to stop it. You left your brother to conduct his own form of punishment, at least that was what Lilah told me. And he did. You gave him free rein to torture an innocent woman.” 

“I would not have allowed that to happen if I had known he would stray from the scripture. Judah and I were raised together. We share the same beliefs. I trusted he would do as I would have.”

Mae glanced down, then with a deathly pale face asked, “Then you too have a child consort? You too have taken children?” She wiped away a tear. “Like we all were taken. Have you too awakened a small child? Sarai is but fourteen, yet by the look of things, she is your brother’s main consort. Do you share those beliefs too? After everything I told you about me, about what we all went through? Can you honestly believe that God wants this from his chosen people?”

Dipping my head, Mae’s spoken truths cut deeper than any dagger ever could. “You know I do not.” I shook my head, feeling the fool. “I was waiting for you. I am pure and was waiting for you. But now…” I trailed off, looking down to her stomach.

Mae wrapped her arms around herself, protectively, and said, “What are you to do with us now? What are you to do with my baby? Please let us go, Cain… please, if there is any good left within you, just let us go. Do not take my family from me… please…”

Anger built in my stomach as I stared at Mae. Anger that she should have been with me, but was not. Anger that Judah had lied to my face when I had asked him what punishment he inflicted on Delilah. And anger at myself, for not knowing every part of the commune’s day to day practices. For not knowing what Judah was permitting when holding the Lord’s Sharings. For not knowing he had taken children. For not knowing his consort was a fourteen-year-old child, one that he had planted in the Hangmen, without my permission. And his plan to bring the Cursed to me, knowing we were not strong enough yet to defend against the Hangmen if they attacked, as surely they now would.

Then I noticed something else… I noticed a purse near the wooden wall, and my stomach sank. Rushing forward, I picked up the purse that was laid next to where Delilah was sat and ripped open the zipper. I pushed in my hand, and in seconds felt her cell in my hand.

I blanched.

With my hands fisted at my side, I shouted, “Judah!”

Judah came running in, Sarai following behind. I pointed at her and ordered, “Get out! I did not call for you! You have no business answering my call!”

Sarai paled, but then ran back out of mill. Judah looked to me, and a proud smile began to spread on his lips. That just incensed me even more, and I stepped closer to him. “Get the van readied,” I ordered.

Judah looked down to the sisters and said, “And what about them?”

I went to push past Judah, when he grabbed my arm. “What are you doing?” he asked quietly, but I could hear the anger in his voice.

“I am letting them go,” I replied shortly.

“You are what?” Judah asked in exasperation, his hands running through his hair.

“I am letting them go. They no longer belong with us at New Zion. They are wed and having children with other men. If the Lord wanted them with us, he would have never made that possible.”

Judah grabbed onto my arm again. “Then the devil’s men win. If we cannot use them as wives, then we shall take them in revenge. They invaded our sacred land, they killed our uncle. They must pay. We are in a war!”

With a surge of fury in my blood, I pressed my palms to Judah’s chest and slammed him against the nearby wooden wall.

Judah’s eyes widened and I lifted the cell in my hand. “Do you know what this is, brother?”