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“You’re right. I used to be. Not anymore. Not for a while now.”
“How do we know you’re telling the truth?” Shaunee asked.
“I believe her.” Shaylin spoke with no hesitation. “I’ve watched her colors change.”
I looked to Aphrodite. “You’re still sure about her?”
“Who her? Shaylin or Nicole?”
“Both,” I said.
Aphrodite’s gaze flicked over Shaylin before coming back to me. “I trust Shaylin’s judgment. If she says the girl’s changed, then I say believe her.”
“She used to be Dallas’s girlfriend, and Dallas just tried to kill Stevie Rae and me!” Shaunee blurted. “I’m not being a bitch—I’m just telling it like it is.”
I heard a few of the kids mutter in agreement with her. Nicole’s face had paled, but she’d lifted her chin and faced Shaunee. “Erin was Dallas’s girlfriend and you still cared enough about her to stand by her pyre until after dawn.”
“I knew Erin a long time,” Shaunee said. “I’ve known you for, like, two seconds.”
“Was Erin perfect for that long time you knew her?” Nicole asked.
Shaunee looked away from the red fledgling. “No. No, she wasn’t.”
“I wasn’t perfect in my past, either, but I’m asking for a second chance.”
I’d heard enough. My Prophetesses and my gut had convinced me. “That’s good enough for me,” I said loudly. “And it needs to be good enough for the rest of you, too. If we held the past against everyone, then Kalona wouldn’t be our High Priestess’s Warrior, and Stark wouldn’t be my Warrior. Hell, Stevie Rae wouldn’t even be my BFF.”
“I would have been shunned and cast out of the House of Night along with Neferet,” Aurox said. I hadn’t noticed him before. He was standing behind us, just inside the basement entrance.
I didn’t look at him, but I did nod in agreement. “And if Aurox hadn’t been given another chance my grandma would be dead. Shaunee, we need to be on the same page about this. Too much crap has happened for us to start mistrusting each other.”
Shaunee looked at Nicole briefly, and then her gaze met mine. “Okay, you’re my High Priestess. I trust you.”
“Thank you,” I said. I looked around the group. “Anyone have anything else to say?”
“Is Stevie Rae gonna be okay?” Kramisha asked.
“Completely,” I said.
“Did Rephaim really save her when he was a bird?” Shaylin asked.
I smiled at Shaunee. “Tell ’em the story, but be fast. Remember that Thanatos said she wants today to be a make-up day and everyone has to be in their first-hour class when the bell rings at eight.”
There were a bunch of groans at that news, but they were cut off by Shaunee’s retelling of what had happened earlier. I took the opportunity to exit to Darius, who was standing at the upper entrance to the basement. Aphrodite, of course, came with me.
As I passed Aurox I glanced quickly at him. The kid looked rough. His eyes were bloodshot and puffy and his perfect skin looked kinda chalky and damp. “Hangovers suck, huh?” I couldn’t stop myself from quipping, though I didn’t wait around to hear if he answered me. Aphrodite snickered all the way up the stairway.
“Kalona and Stark are searching for Dallas?” Darius asked as we joined him.
“Yeah,” I said. “Thanatos wants him brought back for judgment. She said she’s done with his red fledglings, too.”
“It’s going to be real interesting to see what she does with all of them,” Aphrodite said. “Well, if they manage to find Dallas. He’s gotta seriously not want to be found.”
“The immortal will find him, have no doubt of that,” Darius said.
“Did anyone do a roll call and see if any of his friends took off with him?” I said.
“I did a quick check after I made sure our fledglings were safe. Dallas is definitely gone, but I don’t believe anyone left with him,” Darius said.
“I hope whatever Thanatos does makes him leave us alone for good,” Aphrodite said.
I sighed. “I don’t know how you’d even begin to lock up a kid who can control electricity. It’s depressing to start thinking about how many ways he could escape.”
“Thanatos is wise. She will pass a righteous judgment,” Darius said.
“I’m worried that righteous and doable are two totally different things,” I said.
“As your Warrior isn’t present to say this, I will stand in his stead and tell you not to worry so much,” Darius said.
“She’s hardheaded. She’s not going to listen,” Aphrodite said, kissing his cheek. “But thanks for trying.”
He smiled at her. “I am used to dealing with a hardheaded woman.”
“Have you been cheating on me with a stubborn skank?” Aphrodite said, pretending to be pissed off. “Don’t make me claw some poor, less attractive girl’s eyes out.”
Darius laughed and pulled her into his arms. I rolled my eyes. “I’m going to see if I can get lucky two days in a row and get psaghetti for breakfast. Bye, Darius. Aphrodite, I’ll see you in first hour.”
I’d just decided to detour to my dorm room and actually attempt to brush my hair and fix my face before going to the cafeteria when his voice called my name. Truthfully, I didn’t want to stop. I wanted to pretend like I hadn’t heard him and scurry to my room and keep avoiding him for as long as possible. But I’d seen the kid run. It’s not like he couldn’t catch me. I drew a deep breath and stopped, waiting for him.
“Zoey, may I speak to you for a moment?” Aurox asked as he caught up with me.
He sounded so un-Heath-like and formal that I relaxed a little. “Yeah, of course.”
“I believe I owe you an apology.”
“For what?”
His smooth brow furrowed. “I believe I said something impolite to you last night.”
“You believe?”
“My memory seems impaired. I can only remember pieces of what I said.”
“Aurox, getting wasted does a lot more than just impair your memory. It can make you sick and make you do and say stupid things. You don’t need to apologize to me, just don’t get drunk again.”
He sighed and rubbed his forehead as if he had a headache, which I was pretty sure he did have. “But, Zo, beer’s really good.”
I felt like he’d smacked me in the gut. “How do you do that?”
His hand dropped from his forehead and he gave me a totally confused look. “Like the taste of beer?”
“No!” I threw my hands up in frustration. “Sound just like Heath.”
“Do I?”
“Not most of the time, but you did just then, when you called me Zo.”
Aurox blinked a few times, then he said, “I am sorry I offend you.”
“You don’t offend me. You confuse me,” I said.
“You confuse me, too,” he said.
“Why?”
“Because I feel things for you that I know are wrong.”
“Wrong feelings? Like what?” I held my breath while he answered.
“I am drawn to you. I care about you. I think about you. Often,” he said slowly. “And I know those feelings are wrong because you loathe me.”
I opened my mouth to tell him that I didn’t loathe him, hell, I didn’t even dislike him, but he held up his hand, stopping my words.
“No, I understand why you loathe me. It’s not because you are a bad person. You are a really good person—a special person. It’s not your fault you feel like you do.” Aurox started to back away from me. “I just wanted to apologize for anything impolite I said last night. I’ll leave you alone now.”
“Aurox, hang on. Don’t go anywhere. I need to say something to you.” I motioned for him to follow me over to one of the many stone benches that were positioned under the huge oaks on the school grounds. “Okay, sit with me a sec and let me figure out how to say this right.”
He sat beside me. Well, not really beside me. Mostly he perched on the very end of the bench, as far away from me as possible. I sighed.
“All right. Here goes.” I took a long breath and blurted, “I feel as drawn to you as you are to me. I think about you. Wait, no, that’s not right. I make myself not think about you because I’m thinking about you.” I sighed again. “Like that’s not confusing. Anyway, here’s the deal—I’m seventeen, and inside of you is the soul of the kid I’ve loved for almost half of my life. But you’re not that kid, which is what I tell myself all the time, and mostly I can believe it. Then you’ll do something like sing the psaghetti song, or call me Zo with that one tone of voice that only Heath had, or get stupid drunk and say something that’s totally Heath-like, and I’m scared I can’t make myself believe it anymore,” I finished in a rush.