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“What’s going on? Is your family okay?”
“My family is fine … but …” He glanced over at Roddy.
His best friend sighed. “Nora, if we stay here, we’ll never be able to finish oor road trip. We’ll run oot eh’ cash afore then. We need to leave.”
My pulse suddenly started racing as my eyes flew to Jim. “What? Now?”
“In the morning. First thing. When do ye finish here?” It occurred to me while Jim seemed sad, I was panicked. “I’d like to spend some time with ye before we go.”
Before we go.
Shit. It was ending.
Once Jim and Roddy left, everything would return to normal, and I’d feel trapped, unwanted, and depressed all over again. Somehow this guy had become my lifeline.
“I’m supposed to get home after my shift …” My mom would kill me if I didn’t turn up and she had to call in sick to work. Yet I couldn’t find it in me to care. As selfish as it was, I wanted to soak up what time I had left with the boy who had crashed into my life and allowed me to breathe again for the first time in a long time. “But it’s fine. We can hang out. I finish at five.”
Jim exhaled and nodded. He studied me solemnly, and I noted he looked a little pale and tired beneath his tan. “We’ll be back in a few hours.”
Molly waited until the boys were gone. “That fucking sucks.”
I nodded, pretending to busy myself tidying up the condiments tray by my register. I felt her move closer to me.
“Have you guys …?”
Looking at her, I almost laughed at the expression on her face. Her eyebrows were at her hairline. “You know …”
“What?”
She made an “o” with her left thumb and forefinger and then stuck her right forefinger in and out of it.
“Ugh, Molly.” I grabbed her hands and shoved them down so the customers wouldn’t see.
“Well?” she asked through her laughter.
The truth was no, Jim and I hadn’t had sex. We had kissed a few times, and he’d fondled my boobs, but that was it. And he’d said upfront he wasn’t going to push for sex because he wanted me to know I meant more to him than that.
Part of me was relieved because I wasn’t sure I was ready to lose my virginity to Jim, or to anyone, for that matter. Another part of me was scared. Jim confused the hell out of me because I wanted him near, I liked the fact that he felt like an escape from a life I was unhappy with, and I loved that he made me feel like I was someone special. But I was also wary of giving another person that much power over my emotions.
Once upon a time, I thought the sun rose and set with my father.
Look where that had gotten me.
“No,” I finally answered Molly.
“You should do it tonight,” she advised. “If he’s leaving. I’d love to be able to tell my grandkids I lost my virginity to a cute Scottish guy passing through town. In fact, I still might. A lie is better than Kenny Stringer behind the bleachers.”
“You’re going to tell your grandkids how you lost your virginity?”
“Sure, if they ask.”
“And Kenny Stringer? Behind the bleachers? Really?”
Molly wrinkled her nose. “We were fourteen.” She shuddered. “I’m surprised I even gave sex a shot again after that.”
Wait a minute … something niggled at my memory. “You told me you lost your virginity to Cory’s cousin Caden in the eleventh grade.”
“Well, I didn’t want to admit the truth. To be fair, though, Caden was the first boy who was actually any good at it.”
I shook my head. “I’m not you, Molly. I can’t just sleep with someone.”
“But it’s his last night here. I bet he’s expecting it.”
Butterflies raged war in my belly at the thought. Surely not? Jim had said he didn’t want to push for that … then again, he’d said that without thinking about the fact that he was leaving. We both knew his departure was coming but we’d ignored the reality of it.
Now that reality had come home to roost, maybe Molly was right. Maybe Jim would want to have goodbye sex.
I worried my lip with my teeth.
“Nora.”
The butterflies were making me feel sick.
“Nora.”
My knees started to quake a little.
“Nora!” Molly snapped her fingers in front of my face. “God, you’re white as a sheet. Shit. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do, okay?”
I nodded, dazed. “Molly, I’m not ready …”
“Then don’t.” She squeezed my shoulder. “You don’t owe this guy anything.”
Just as I finished my shift, I saw the Mustang pull into the parking lot. Although Molly’s reassurance had helped some, my anxiety hadn’t fully dissipated. I was worried about disappointing Jim. As much as I was fighting it, he’d come to mean a lot to me.
“You’re done.” Molls grinned at me. “Have fun!”
I gave her a shaky smile and hurried into the back to grab my purse. Unfortunately, I didn’t have a change of clothing so I was going to have to hang out with the guys in my uniform. There was no way in hell I was going home to change because my mom would insist on me staying to watch Dad.
Just once … just this once, I wanted to be reckless and irresponsible and totally selfish.
Jim and Roddy were grabbing burgers to go as I came out from the back.
“We got ye something to eat,” Jim said, nodding to the to-go bags.
I wasn’t a huge fan of having to eat the food I’d been serving all day, but it was sweet of them. I smiled my thanks.
Jim, Roddy, and I had just walked out of the restaurant when the sight of a tall blond getting out of his GMC truck made me falter.
“Shit,” I muttered.
Cory Trent.
Jim’s hand rested on my lower back. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing, let’s go.” Unfortunately, we had to walk by Cory and his cousin Caden.
Even before Cory’s dad bought my dad’s company, he’d been a giant asshole to me. His assholery had only worsened when he asked me out our senior year and I shot him down. That had not gone over well with Cory, who thought he was God’s gift to women everywhere.
Word was he was spending the summer before college in Palm Springs where Caden’s mom had moved after his parents’ divorce.
Apparently, not all summer.
“Well, well, well,” Cory called out as he strode toward us.
He wore board shorts, flip-flops, and a green polo shirt, and swaggered like he was the big man in town. Give a boy a little money and popularity and he turns into a dipshit.
Or at least this one had.
In saying that, he’d pretty much been a dipshit since preschool.
“Cory,” I sighed.
Jim must have sensed something in my body language or maybe it was the lascivious and angry way Cory was dragging his eyes over my body. Whatever it was, I felt the boys on either side of me go on alert, and Jim stepped a little in front of me.
Cory’s eyes flicked to him and then back to me. He sneered. “How the mighty have fallen, huh, Nora?”
“What’s yer problem?” Jim asked, a warning in his voice.
Raising an eyebrow, Cory looked at Jim before turning to snort at his cousin. “Who’s the fucking foreigner?”
“Guys, let’s go.” I tugged on Jim’s sleeve and took a step forward when Cory was suddenly in my face.
“What’s the rush, O’Brien? Don’t you think it’s time you admit you made a mistake?” His eyes dropped to my breasts, and I wanted to cover them … or kick him in the balls. Actually, I wanted to do both.
Not that there was any need because suddenly Jim was there. He planted a hand on Cory’s shoulder and shoved him. Hard. “Back off.”
Cory shrugged his polo shirt back into place and scowled at us. “Nice to see you get what you deserve, Nora. You always thought you were better than everyone else. It seems now you know that’s not true, you’re finally opening those bird legs of yours.”
“Ye might want to shut up, mate,” Jim warned.