I’d been wanting her for a fuck of a long time, but everything had been put on the back burner for Nova. And now that was done and over with.

Logan’s words were in my head about what I was doing after this?

Hell.

I bought a house here. I’d do anything for Nova, but this morning woke me up.

I wanted to do this with Quincey. It felt right to have her beside me, have her be the one holding Nova. Only her being the one to hold Nova.

She gasped, finally seeing me.

Finally.

“I wanted to fuck you the first moment I saw you.”

Her eyes got big, but she wasn’t surprised. She knew.

I advanced. “Then you hit me with three punches. Someone I cared about was dead, I had a daughter, and you wanted to take that daughter away. I hated you at that moment. Detested you. I loathed your father even more because who the fuck do you both think you are? Coming after me. If you fought me over Nova, I would’ve taken you to court. I would’ve won, and you knew that. It’s why you signed that paper. Nova is mine. You can’t do shit about it. Your father can’t do shit about it. Logan was asking me the other day what I wanted? Because I’m going to be real again, I miss my friends. They’re my family. At first, I gave Valerie up for them, then I gave them up for Nova. I’m not giving anything up anymore. I’m going to be really selfish here.”

Fear sprang in her gaze, but she didn’t shift away. She didn’t look to the side.

She didn’t cower or tremble.

She did nothing but stared right back at me.

I advanced again, lowering my head, gentling my tone. “I don’t love you.”

A small wince from her. She couldn’t hide it.

“But I want to fuck you, and when taking Nova to the ER with you, I didn’t want anyone else beside me with her. I don’t know what that means, but… Right now, I need to fuck you, and right now, I really, really hate seeing you falling apart without me there to comfort you.”

One last step. I was so close to her.

She was breathing hard, ragged.

So was I.

I watched, waiting. I needed to see her decision.

She looked away. “I’m sorry for what I tried to do. I think about it now, and I despise myself.”

I moved in, touching her chin.

I raised her face.

The tears were there again, swimming in her eyes, waiting to be shed.

I cupped her face with both my hands and wiped under her eyes with my thumbs. There. She blinked, and they were gone.

A new awareness was coming up. It was like she was starting to see me for the first time. Then her mouth opened. A small ‘oh’ and that was all I needed.

I moved down, my lips finding hers.

She gasped, opening her mouth wider. Her hands clamped on my arms, and she surged up on her toes. I pulled her entire body against mine and lifted her, carrying her to the bed in the back of the pool house.

“Nate, I—”

“Shut up.”

We were done talking.

38

Quincey

“Quincey, honey. We need you on the line.”

Right.

I snapped back to reality and tried to stomp down the flush I knew was already starting. I’d been thinking about Nate, Nate’s body, how his body felt over mine, inside mine, how he intertwined our hands—and I was gone again.

“Quincey.”

That was Matthew, a hiss from him.

Shit.

We were in our last rehearsals with Patrice, and I wasn’t paying attention at all. I ducked my head down and went to my place. Matthew stepped behind me, his hand on my waist, and we both raised our hands up.

“What’s going on with you? Patrice has not been happy with your distraction. And gotta say, neither am I.” His hand squeezed my side for a bit.

Right.

I closed my eyes, but I didn’t have time for my usual waves of self-condemnation.

“I’ve just been distracted. Sorry.”

I looked over. Patrice was frowning at me, but she was nodding at what Miss Aimes was saying to her. We had only today and tomorrow with our choreographer. She was flying off, and then we’d finish going through the entire production with Miss Aimes. Everything would get polished, smoothed up, and perfected, and Patrice would be back for our first show.

“All right. We’re going to go through it one more time.” Patrice signaled, and the music started.

I went through the steps, but I wasn’t present.

I was back in bed, in Nate’s bed, which had become our shared bed over the last week. So much had happened and changed over the past three months. I signed with Dierek. I auditioned and was cast in this lead, and then everything with my father. All of it seemed to be stumbling at a fast pace, so fast that I couldn’t get my head on straight. I focused on two things. Nova. And dance. I let Nate and his team take over handling my father, which I needed.