Asher doesn’t say a thing for a long while. After a moment, his brows bunch and he says, “Was it something I did?”


“What do you mean?”

His eyes slide down to my belly. “Was I too rough or some shit? Is that why you can’t have kids? Did I fuck you up somehow?”

Oh no.

He thinks he did this to me.

Crawling across the bed to him, I kiss the top of his head and tell him, “No, Ash. It wasn’t you. You just helped me figure out I had something wrong with me. Nothing you did would’ve changed the outcome. I’m just not destined to have children. That’s it. I swear.”

Nodding but holding a look of incredulity, he states, “I like rough sex. I don’t know why, I just fucking do.” Looking up at me and holding my eyes, he asks, “Did the doctor say there was absolutely no chance I broke you or are you just saying that to make me feel better?”

It’s sweet that he cares so much. He looks so damn devastated, and I try so hard that I’m sure my face is bright red, but I can’t help what happens next.

I burst into laughter.

Right in his face.

It might be the fact that I’ve had two hours of sleep or it might be the fact that Ash thinks he broke me, but I can’t stop laughing. My head falls onto his shoulder with a plop and I feel his body shake with laughter too. He wraps me up in his arms and I laugh into him. I choke out between my laughter. “You think you BROKE me, Ash! What the fuck?”

He chuckles. “I don’t know how a woman’s body works! Fuck!” Still wrapped up in him, he whispers, “What am I gonna do with you, girl?”

He kisses the side of my neck, and although I lift my head to give him better access, I know there’s no time for a play session this morning. I grip his shoulders as he plants his mouth firmer onto my throat. My breathing heavies and my eyes close from the pleasure his skilled mouth is bringing me, but I manage to utter, “Ash, I need a shower. I have to get to work, like, soon.”

With that he groans against my neck and releases me from his hold. We stare at each other for a few seconds before he prompts with smiling eyes, “Shower, babe.”

I whisper, “Right. Yeah. Shower.”

Acting on impulse, I slide my palm up his thigh to grip him through his pajama pants. His eyes darken and his mouth parts slightly. “This is gonna keep, right?”

Smiling that damn crooked smile I love so much, he answers, “For you, babe. It’ll keep for months.”

Smiling, I lean forward to kiss his lips and whisper against them, “That was a great answer.”

Then I hop up, walk out of his apartment and go back to mine to shower and get ready for work.

Chapter Fifteen

Rocking my world

Growing up, I loved Disney movies. I love Disney movies so much that my sisters and I still watch them together. I don’t think you can ever be too old to watch Disney.

Why am I bringing this up?

I’m bringing this up because after this morning’s lust, fright, then deep and meaningful discussions with Asher, I feel lighter. While I walk the concrete sidewalk to get to work, I actually feel like Snow White, daintily dancing through the forest with her little critter friends following her as she sings. Only my little forest critters are actually those awful grey pigeons.

I’m pretty sure those pigeons carry diseases. And here comes one now.

I sidestep the pigeon and carry on my golden path. Nothing’s going to bring me down today! Arriving in front of Safira’s, I flash my brightest smile and push the door open. Walking across the studio, I greet anyone and everyone with, “Good morning, bitches!”

No one answers, and I chuckle because I’m sure they’re all tired and hung-over from the night before. When I arrive into the store room, my blood runs cold. Tina sits on the desk sniffling and wiping at her eyes.

Whoever hurt my best friend is fucked!

I say, “Honey bear, what’s wrong?” as I wrap her into a hug.

She sobs into my shoulder and squeaks, “It doesn’t match!”

What the hell?

Moving her long dark hair out of her face, I prompt her to start from the start. “Come again?”

Still sobbing, she holds up two of Safira’s catalogues and points to a dress that appears in both. She chokes out, “The printing company got the color wrong!”

Confusion furrows my brow while I look hard at both catalogues. I honestly can’t see a difference and I tell Tina that. She drags me out of the store room and over to the display windows so I can see them in the sunlight. She pokes one catalogue with tears pouring out of her pretty green eyes. I look closer and still can’t see the difference in color. Giving up, I ask her, “What’s wrong, beba? This isn’t about some silly catalogue, right?”

I get no response to this. Tina simply lifts her head and wails loudly.

Okay, I’m losing my shit freaking out. I’m not really good with emotions. I mean, I have a lot of them, I just don’t know how to address other women’s unexplained ugly cries. I’ve dealt with many versions of Tina, but I have never seen her like this. She’s gone cuckoo bananas. I look around in panic before I get a stupid idea.


I run across the room to the counter, fiddle underneath it til I feel the protruding knob and press the panic button. As soon as I press it, relief courses through me knowing Nik will be here in a second to deal with today’s crazy-assed version of my best friend Tina. Not a second later, I cringe as I realize that Asher’s head probably just exploded from the amount of noise that thing causes in The White Rabbit’s security room.

Less than a minute passes before Nik barges through the door and as he opens his mouth to say something, spots an inconsolable Tina with her head raised up to the ceiling, sobbing like a mad woman. I look over at him with a what the fuck expression, but he just sighs deeply and shaking his head, walks over to his wife to wrap her up tight.

My good morning has turned to shit.

I need a drink. Stat.

I gasp in fright when I hear someone whisper in my ear, “Lunch time. Security office. You owe me. I can’t hear shit.”

Turning, I see Asher wiggling around a finger in his ear trying to clear it. I shoot him an apologetic look before saying, “I panicked.” His lip curls and he narrows his eyes at me. I raise my hands in surrender before leaning closer to him and hissing, “Would you look at her? I’ve never seen her like that!”

We both turn to look at Nik and Tina. Nik whispers into Tina’s ear. She squeezes him around his waist and nods. She seems calmer and I thank God that I won’t have to deal with Tina crying all day. I love Tina and I hate when she’s upset.

Tina moves away from Nik to face me with a wobbly smile. “Sorry I scared you. Lady issues.”

Asher and I both say Oh! at the same time. Craziness explained. Poor Tina has her period.

Oh shit.

That means Lola and Mimi will have their period too. That’s how close we all are. The girls’ periods have synced. I don’t get my period because of the PCOS. Do you have any idea what it’s like hanging out with three women who are on their periods at once? Running a hand down my face in woe, I tell her, “That’s okay, babe. I wish you would’ve told me before you went all crazy on my ass.”

Tina bursts into laughter, looking a little uncomfortable. Her face softens when she steps on her tiptoes to kiss her husband. Looking over, she tells Asher, “No more freak outs. I promise.” As she holds her fingers up in a scout’s honor before making her way back to the storeroom.

Nik looks over at me wide-eyed, “She’s been a little emotional the last couple of days. I used the wrong fabric softener yesterday and she cried.” Leaning closer to me, he hisses, “For four hours, Nat! She cried for four hours because I used the wrong fabric softener. When I asked her why this was such a big deal, do you know what she said?”

Shaking my head, he leans back, arms wide and announces, “Because it smells too flowery. She likes the soft flowers, not the oriental flowers.” Running a hand through his hair, he goes on, “So I ask her why she buys the oriental flower shit and she says because she liked it at the supermarket but not when she used it on the clothes. So I ask why she doesn’t just throw it away and you know what happened?”

Biting my lip to stop myself from laughing at Nik in his disheveled state, I shake my head once more. He narrows his golden eyes at my twitching lip before telling me, “She gave me the silent treatment all night. But kept forgetting she wasn’t talking to me so all freakin’ night I was getting half sentences thrown at me before she’d narrow her eyes and glare at me! Then the next morning, it’s like nothing happened! I’m losing it, Nat. This close.”

Covering my face with my hand, I close my eyes as my body shakes with silent laughter. I hear Nik say, “Why did I think I’d get any sympathy from you? Some sister you are.” Nik wraps his arms around me and chuckles with me. He kisses my forehead. “Next time she freaks out, just call. No more panic button.” And with that, he and Ash leave. Nik walks ahead and Ash turns back to me and mouths lunch time.

My belly clenches with anticipation.

Is it lunch time yet?


Checking my wrist watch, the time reads 12:37pm. If I have to watch her fart-assing around on the CCTV for more than another ten minutes, she’s gonna get it.

A smirk forms on my face.

I would like all too much to give it to her. Mmmm mmmm. That fucking sexy ass draped over my thighs while I make her count it out.

A shudder runs through me.

I don’t really know where my need to be dominant comes from. I’m not a dom or anything. I just like control. The first shrink I ever went to told me it’s because of what happened when I was a kid. It’s my way of taking back some form of control in my chaotic life. As a thank you for diagnosing me, I spanked her then fucked her on her desk. I never went back to therapy, but I was tempted.

Here we go.

Nat exits Safira’s and heads over to The White Rabbit. She disappears from the screen, but I hear the clip clop of her heels a few minutes later. She stops a little too far away but I hear her ask someone, “I need to talk to Ghost in private. Where’s the security room?”

I hear Trick answer, “Just that door there, doll. What did he do now?”

Nat answers through a long exhale, “What didn’t he do?”

I smirk, stand and wait for the door to open. When it does, I pull her in, shut the door and lock it. She looks up at me wide-eyed. I take her in.


Like a fallen angel, she wears a white long flowing dress with flat strappy sandals. It sounds innocent right? Nope. Her bright red hair flows down her back with matching bright red lips today.

Fuck, she’s hot.

She backs up as I stalk toward her. She whispers, “You know everyone’s out there, right? What if someone hears?”

Pursing my lips, I tilt my head and say quietly, “You’re just going to have to be quiet. Aren’t you, pretty girl?”

Her back hits the wall. She’s stuck now. I move in for the kill.

I press in so close to her that my chest pushes her back even further. Her breathing heavies and she looks up at me with a grin before sliding down the wall. I close my eyes as she unbuttons my jeans and pulls them down a little. My cock is suddenly bathed in wet warmth and I tell myself not to look down. I can’t stop myself. I have to see her mouth on me.

She sucks me with her eyes closed. Her full, bright red lips make an O as she moves me in and out of her beautiful mouth. I lower my hand to cup her jaw and take over. Pressing deeper with every slow thrust, I can see she’s beginning to struggle but she takes my cock without gagging.


That right there…that’s perfection.

My spine starts to tingle and I pull away from her flawless mouth. Saliva dribbles down her chin and something animalistic in me awakens. I lean forward and reach under her dress to remove her plain white panties then put my hands under her arms and lift her small body high against me. Using the wall as leverage, I push my chest into hers to hold her there as I lift the bottom of her dress high over her hips and fist it at one side to keep it up. I lick her along her bottom lip and ask, “You ever been fucked against a wall?”

Her hooded eyes meet mine and through parted lips she sighs, “Nuh uh.”

Placing my hand under her firm ass, I lower her a little, just til I feel my cock come into contact with her pussy. “You ready for me, babe?”

She tries to roll her hips to cause more contact but I hold her just out of reach. Cupping my face with both hands, she kisses me deeply before pulling back and answering, “Fuck yeah.”

Holding her there a few seconds more, a cruel smirk forms when I see her start to get frustrated. Leaning forward and kissing me again, her tongue moves against mine and she tastes so good that I moan. I reach down and hold my shaft, rubbing the head along her dripping slit and use it to massage her clit. Her whimper turns to a growl then she whisper hisses, “Will you just fuck me already?”

“You know I don’t do anything without being asked nicely.”

Gyrating against the head of my cock, she moans, “Oh god. I need this. Please, Ash. Please fuck me.”

Capturing her lips in a deep possessive kiss, I pull back and utter, “That’s my girl. Let’s do this.”

Lowering her slightly, the head of my cock slips into her and we both moan. Realizing we’re both being kind of loud, I kiss her to stop us from being heard. I lower her inch by inch til her tight, warm pussy is completely impaled on me. Pulling back from her mouth, I place my forehead against hers and whisper, “So fucking tight, babe. So wet.”

Moving back from the wall a step, I use my hands under her ass to lift her almost right off me then lower her quickly while thrusting up into her. We both moan and I’m sure we’re going to be heard. Without thinking, I move her back against the wall, take one hand off her ass and cover her mouth. Her eyes open wide and I wink at her. Her eyes narrow at me as I thrust into her.


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