“What kind of stuff? I’m stuck in junior high with Aiden. Let me live vicariously through you.”

Riley almost drops his phone. “What about Dawson?”

“I haven’t done anything with him lately.”

“Why?”

“Because Aiden kissed me with his tongue.”

The teacher shushes us again, so he texts me.

Riley: So you like Aiden?

Me: Yeah. Although, when I went to visit my family, my ex was there.

Riley: How did that go?

Me: We’ve become friends again.

Riley: Just friends?

Me: Yeah, for now. I don’t know what the future will hold.

Riley: Your ex was a jerk to you. You should forget about him.

Me: He was my first love. Part of me still loves him.

Riley: Sometimes the past should stay in the past.

Me: HA! Someone should tell our teacher that!

Riley: I dare you to ask him why we have to study history.

I raise my hand and interrupt the lecture.

“Yes, Miss Monroe?”

“Why do we have to study history?”

“Well, that’s easy. We study history so we don’t repeat the mistakes of the past.”

Riley: OMFG! The universe just spoke to you again! How does THAT relate to your life?

Me: Are you saying if I got back together with my ex that I would be repeating the mistakes of my past?

Riley: Uh, yeah.

Me: People grow and change. He’s changed. He’s not the person that he used to be. Neither am I.

Riley: I REALLY want to have sex with Ariela on the furry rug, but if I try, will she get mad at me again? Would that be repeating a mistake of my past?

Me: I have no idea. But I’ve always wanted to have sex on the furry rug too.

Riley: You’ve been coveting my rug?!

Me: I owned your rug. Has Dallas had sex on the rug?

Riley’s eyes get huge and he holds his hands up to his chin like he’s covering himself up. “He wouldn’t dare! Would he?”

I just shrug my shoulders.

Shirtless for five days.

Ceramics

Peyton texts me during ceramics.

Peyton: After you and Aiden went to that French restaurant, he told me you said something about us going to St. Croix with you for Thanksgiving break. We just found out that our parents are going to be on a safari. Whitney wants me to come with her to Palm Beach. Needless to say, the idea of spending the break with her family makes me want to poke my own eyes out. I thought about going to the Johnsons. I know that Riley and Aiden are friends, but I didn’t want it to be awkward with Dawson. So that’s kinda out. That leaves St. Croix with you.

Me: Glad to hear I’m so high on the list of options.

Peyton: You are first on our list of options. I’m just telling you that my backup plans suck so that you will feel sorry for us and say yes.

I imagine being there with Aiden. Seeing him shirtless for five days straight.

Me: Yes.

Peyton: Really?!!!!!! Yay!!! We’re going to have so much fun. And I promise that I won’t be like an annoying third wheel or anything. I’ll let you have time alone. I just want a beach chair, a view, and a good book.

Me: No boys?

Peyton: No boys. But if you could arrange to bring hottie Cooper, I’d gladly take a man.

Me: Very funny.

Peyton: Do I need to book flights? When do we need to leave?

Me: I booked a charter flight, so you can just join me. I’ll have a car pick us up on Wednesday at noon and drop us of at the Municipal airport.

Peyton: Sounds good :) Yay!!

That’s harsh.

French

“Peyton said she talked to you about Thanksgiving break. Sounds like it’s gonna be the three of us in St. Croix.”

“It should be fun.”

“Tell me about the house. What we’ll do.”

“Well, since I was little, we’ve been calling the house The Crab. I can’t remember why we named it that. It has a full staff, so we won’t exactly be roughing it. It’s very laid back but very luxurious. The perfect mix. It’s one of my favorite places ever. Like paradise. It has a rooftop balcony on top of a turret overlooking the ocean. And the bedroom I always stay in is in the turret. It’s amazing. Want to know my other favorite thing?”

“Yeah.”

“There’s a fountain with a tile mosaic of a prince and a mermaid, who’s sitting on top of a treasure chest. The Little Mermaid has always been my favorite Disney movie. Of course that may be because I wanted to marry Prince Eric.”

“Why’s that?”

“He had a castle on the beach.”

He laughs. “Do you want to live in a castle on the beach someday?”

“Yes.”

“Well, it sounds perfect. I’m looking forward to both it and going to your loft this weekend. Mostly, I’m looking forward to just hanging out with you.”

“I’m looking forward to the loft too. Between the play and traveling, I’m tired. Not to mention behind on my homework.”

“Maybe we should meet in the library to study tonight.”

“Not your room?”

“If you come to my room, we’ll kiss and not study.”

“I’m kind of obsessed with your tongue.”

“Why do you think I waited so long?”

“Because your tongue is cursed?”

“What?”

“Nothing. Why did you make me wait so long?”

“I’m hoping that it made you want it even more. From what I can tell, you’re a girl who’s used to getting exactly what she wants.”

“I wish I was one of those girls,” Annie says with a huff.

“What’s wrong?” I ask her.

“Are you ever afraid to be happy?”

“All the time. Are things okay with you and Ace?”

“Did you hear what Logan did for Maggie?”

Aiden says, “Keatyn helped him plan it.”

“Then help Ace plan something romantic. Seriously, the boy doesn’t understand romance.”

“What do you want to be romantic? He already asked you out.”

“You know what I want to be romantic,” she says to me with her eyes bugged out.

“Oh, I heard a fun line about that today. I say we bypass all the bullshit and just get naked.”

“Where did you hear that?” I say to Aiden.

“Riley told me at lunch.”

“What else did he tell you about that line?”

“He was just joking and saying he wanted to use it on Ariela.”

I squint my eyes at him. “And that’s it?”

Aiden gives me an odd look. “Uh, yeah, that’s it.”

“He didn’t tell you about anyone else that may feel that way?”

“Uh, no.”

“I feel that way,” Annie confesses. “Well, sometimes, but then I want it to be flowers and romance.”

“What was your first time like, Aiden? You’re a fairly romantic guy,” I say.

“I’ve never really been romantic. And my first time was not romantic. At all.”

“What do you think girls want? Romance-wise?”

He gives me a sexy smirk. “They want to be wooed.”

Annie clasps her hands and says dreamily, “They do.”

After class, Annie says, “I forgot to tell you. I heard about this really cool thing online. There’s this guy that’s remaking one of Abby Johnston’s old movies and he’s doing a nationwide search for an actress to play—”

“She’s not interested,” Aiden says firmly to Annie. “Even though we all thought she was amazing, she didn’t enjoy doing the play and won’t be acting again.”

“Really?” Annie gives me a bewildered look.

“Yes, really. I didn’t like it. I want to be a doctor, I think. Although we’re getting back those career surveys next week. Maybe it will tell me what I should do for a job.”

“But, you could make a ton of money. All I’d have to do is nominate you online.”

“Annie, please don’t. I would turn it down. I love Eastbrooke and if I got a movie, I’d have to leave. I’d miss you.”

“I’d miss you too. But what about the money?”

I shrug my shoulder. “I don’t care. If you nominated me, I wouldn’t try out. I wouldn’t even talk to the guy.”

“That’s harsh,” she says, still looking at me funny.

Back in the saddle again.

5:35pm

Dawson texts me while I’m lying on my bed studying.

Dawson: Nothing is going on tonight. Wanna get some dinner? We haven’t hardly talked since Friday.

Me: I’d love to. I miss talking to you.

Aiden calls me as I’m throwing on a cute dress.

“Do you want to go out for dinner tonight?”

“Um, I can’t. Dawson asked me to have dinner with him. He was out of town and then I was out of town, so we’re going to catch up.”

“Catch up? Great.”

“Aiden, it’s just dinner. I still want to meet you in the library to study later. Say eight?”

“Yeah, sure.”

I can tell by the tone of his voice that he’s not happy about it. But Dawson is my friend and I’m still going to hang out with him.

Dawson takes me to the little Italian restaurant where we went on what was sort of our first date.

“Remember when I first brought you here?”

“Yeah, Dawson. I do.”

“Are we going to have sex again?”

“Not right now. I can’t. It was making me sick.”

“Sex with me was making you sick?”

“Not literally, no. You know I loved it. But kissing Aiden one night and doing that with you the next felt slutty.”

“Slutty would have been having sex with us both.”

“I think it’s easy to say that. To call girls sluts. To make judgments about them. But our sex lives should be personal. It’s no one’s business who or how many people I choose to sleep with. If people worried about their own personal lives and judged themselves rather than others, I think the world would be a better place.”

“Does that mean you won’t judge me when I tell you I hooked up with the pre-med girl?”

His confession takes the breath out of my lungs. I press my fingertips into my eyebrow.

“Keatie . . .”

I close my eyes tightly. “It’s okay. I understand.”

“I needed to see.”

“If it would be good with someone else? Was it?”

“She was drunk and threw up as soon as we were done.”

“What happened to not wanting to do it with drunk girls anymore?”

“Try to find a girl at college on a Saturday night who isn’t drunk.”

I laugh. “I’m sure there are plenty.”

“Not at the party I was at.”

“Did it feel good?”

“I mean, yeah, it felt good, but it didn’t feel the same. You know?”

“No, Dawson. I don’t know. I haven’t done it with anyone else.”

“Great. Make me feel guilty.”

“I wasn’t trying to make you feel guilty. I was just stating a fact. Because I don’t know.”

“Cam said I needed to get back in the saddle again.”

“Well, of course. I mean, it’d been a whole week since you were last in the saddle.”

“That was sarcastic.”

“Yes, Dawson, it was. I don’t think you should listen to Camden. I know you are close, but I don’t think he gives very good advice. Honestly, Riley has a way better head on his shoulder.”

“Riley is stranded on third base.”

“Riley is in love.”

“Well, I’m not. So . . .”

“You’re a good guy too, Dawes. Don’t let Cam or college change you. I would never fall for someone like Camden, but I fell for you.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

“So, aside from that. What else did you do?”

“Nothing. We got high, played video games, ate, slept, drank, partied.”

“Sounds fun.”

“I’m not sure it’s what I want.”

“What do you mean?”

“I’m not sure I want to go to college with him.”

“Where are you thinking about going?”

“Maybe NYU with Jake. Did you know he’s thinking about going there? His family is going to have a fit, but he’s excited. We could get a cool apartment. Or a loft.”

“Do you know what you want to do? What you want to major in?”

“Cam says he’s majoring in pussy.”

I laugh out loud at that. “I’m sorry, but that’s really funny.”

Dawson grins. “I love hearing you laugh. I hope we can still have fun together.”

“It will be a little hard at first, but I think we’ll get through it. I want to stay friends.”

“It’s always a little hard at first,” Dawson snickers.

“Your mind is always in the gutter.”

“Just like yours.”

Still my bliss.

7:30pm

I text Aiden.

Me: I’m back from dinner. Ready to study?

Hottie God: I studied some before dinner. Do you have much left to do?

Me: Well, technically, I have two days to turn in my missed assignments :)

Hottie God: So, technically, you don’t have to study?

Me: I can think of some things that might be more fun.

Hottie God: Like what?