“And you don’t have fun with us?” The pitch of her voice rises a few octaves.

“No. Actually, I don’t.” I feel a sense of relief admitting it. Saying it out loud makes me feel true to myself. Finally.

Emily’s expression is scathing. “You are so not getting what you think you’re getting when we get home.”

And there it is, the chip she keeps anteing up. She’s staring up at me, waiting for me to grovel or try to fix what she thinks I’ve done wrong. Only, I don’t want what she’s dangling at the moment. Never thought I’d see the day when I wouldn’t want inside of Emily Bennett. But right now, it’s the furthest thing from my mind. Looking her straight in the eyes, I give her the god’s honest truth. “You know what, Em. I’m not in the mood anyway.”

Her jaw drops, the look of shock on her face is priceless. I’d really love to end this conversation by just walking away, but we’ve strayed pretty far from the crowd and I won’t leave her to walk back alone.

“Come on. I’ll walk you back to your friends.”

“You’ll be sorry tomorrow, Zack Martin. And, you know what, by then it may be too late.” Nose high in the air, Emily struts back to the bonfire to rejoin the crowd.

***

At midnight, I try to get Emily to let me drive her home. Speaking or not, I brought her here and I feel responsible for taking her home. “Em,” I say in a low voice, but loud enough so she can hear me.

Every single mouth in her gaggle of girls shushes and turns to face me. They anxiously wait on our exchange. Emily looks up at me, but says nothing.

“You want to get going?”

“I’m staying. I’ll get a ride,” she says the words expecting a reaction from me. Thinks I’ll be upset that we aren’t going home together, for things to happen as originally planned.

“Okay. Who’s driving you?” It’s an innocent question, one meant to make sure she gets home safely, although that’s not how Emily chooses to hear it.

“Dylan will drive me.” She smirks and I see her girlfriends trying to suppress smiles. I’m sure they all knew what was supposed to happen tonight and are proud of Emily for what they perceive is my punishment. “You shouldn’t wait up.”

“Okay, Emily. Get home safe.”

Chapter 9

Zack—

Long Beach, California

I wake to the creak of my door and the sound of my mother calling my name. Pulling the covers up over my head, I try to drown out the sound. But something about her voice shakes me to my core. There’s a thick tremble as she speaks. “Zack. Wake up.” She sniffles.

My brain goes from groggy to high alert. My body bolts upright. She’s crying. My mother does not cry. “What’s wrong, Mom?” Assuming the worst, panic sets in. Something’s happened to my father, I fear.

Her cries turn into sobs. She doesn’t respond.

“Mom. Where’s Dad?” My voice is growing louder.

More sobs. She slumps into me as her cry intensifies. Wrapping my arms around her back, I hold her, but my voice becomes more insistent. “Mom, what’s going on? Where’s Dad?” My own tears start to well, even though I’m still in the dark over what we’re crying about.

“He’s downstairs,” she finally spits out, breathless between sobs.

“What happened, Mom?”

“It’s Emily.”

My heart clenches in my chest.

“What?” My voice rises to a yell. “Mom, what about Emily?”

She cries more. My father comes to the door. I turn, catching sight of him. He’s been crying too. My heart jumps into my throat.

“Zack.” My father takes a deep breath. “Emily’s been in an accident, son.”

Nausea overwhelms me, my head spins, but I force myself from the bed. “Where is she?” I’m yanking on clothes as I speak.

“Long Beach University Hospital.”

Frantically, I search my desk for my keys, then take off down the stairs. My father shouts for me to wait, but I’m out the door before he can catch up to me. He rips open the passenger door just as I’m backing out and jumps in.

Pacing the ER waiting area like a caged lion, I wait and wait for what seems like forever. My mother arrives carrying my shoes. Looking down, I’m surprised to find I don’t have any on.

“Did you hear anything yet?” She whispers to my father.

He shakes his head and wraps his arm around her shoulder, pulling her to him tightly.

Finally, after what seems like days, Emily’s parents emerge from the double doors that block her from me. I rush to them. Mr. Bennett looks at me and shakes his head no. No? What does he mean, no? My father comes to stand next to me. Mrs. Bennett finally looks up and, seeing me, she completely breaks down. Wailing, she falls to the floor.

My breathing comes faster and shorter. I feel dizzy. My thoughts spin so fast I can’t see. They only stop when my entire world goes dark.

Chapter 10

Zack—

Long Beach, California— 2 days later

I stand in the parking lot alone, rain pelts down on me so hard it should sting, but I feel no pain. I feel nothing. Hollow. A shell of a body incapable of emotion. I look down at my navy suit, the one I wore to the homecoming dance with Emily, it’s soaked through, clinging tightly against my body. Squeezing my eyes shut, I pray to a god I’m not sure I believe in anymore, begging him to take the image that was just seared into my brain from my memory. But it’s no use, closing my eyes only makes the visual of her lying there even more vivid. I force them back open to chase what I see away, but it doesn’t work. Visions of Emily lying there, so still, so peaceful, consume me. Her normally glowing, tanned skin is pale and dull, gray replacing the bronze and pink sun drenched color.