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I nodded then went on, “Billy hates him. A lot. I don’t know how bad it has to get but that’s bad enough for me.”
He took his hand from my neck, I missed it even though I didn’t want to but I didn’t have to miss it long. He leaned forward and rested his weight in his hand on the back of the bench which brought the rest of his torso and definitely his face close to me.
When his eyes locked back on mine, he asked quietly, “You need me to help?”
There it was; the offer I needed. An offer that terrified me but I had no choice but to take it.
“Since I don’t know the system and you do and I love those kids and I need to get them away from that mess, yes. Any advice you can give me would be appreciated,” I answered and I did it fast before I lost the courage to do it at all.
His eyes kept mine captive but they changed. I couldn’t put my finger on how but however it was made a whoosh sweep through my belly.
“I can do more than advice, sweetheart,” he said, still talking quietly.
“Whatever you could do, Mitch, like I said, would be appreciated.”
His eyes moved over my face then when they caught mine again, he noted, “You care about them.”
“I love them.”
“Family?” he asked probingly.
“They’re great kids,” I answered telling him it was much more than blood ties.
“They love you,” he said softly.
“I know,” I replied just as soft.
“You’ve struggled with this awhile,” he surmised.
“Yeah,” I whispered.
He stayed leaned into his one hand, his other hand came up to curl around the side of my neck and his thumb swept my jaw as he said, “Makin’ the decision is half the battle, sweetheart.”
I sucked in breath through my nose, pulled my lips between my teeth and closed my eyes. When I opened them, I’d slid them away so I wasn’t looking at him.
I did this so I could admit, “If that’s true, then why am I scared to death of what’s to come?”
“’Cause it might get ugly. ‘Cause any change in life is scary. ‘Cause you avoid risk like the plague and this is a big one that’s gonna have a long-lasting effect on three lives. And ‘cause you’re not stupid.”
My eyes went back to his and I remarked, “Don’t sugarcoat it, Mitch. Give it to me straight.”
He chuckled and his fingers curled deeper into my neck before he said, “You’re gonna be all right, Mara, and they’re gonna be all right which is why you’re doin’ this in the first place. You gotta believe in that.”
“Right,” I muttered, my eyes sliding away again.
I got a squeeze at the neck and my eyes went back.
“Right,” he whispered.
He was looking at me with his serious, firm face but his eyes were warm and it hit me that it wasn’t the same friendly neighbor warmth but something deeper. Something more important. Almost like he respected me. Like he was proud of me.
My breath caught then the warmth in his gaze shifted to something else. His fingers pressed into my neck bringing my face closer to his as his moved closer to mine and that was when we both heard Billie yell, “Sillies! What are you doing? It’s time for burritos!”
Mitch closed his eyes slowly as his fingers flexed into my neck.
I pulled free quickly, jumped off the bench, told myself I was being silly and rounded the bench to get myself and my soon to be legal charges (hopefully) some food.
I didn’t make it to the door without Mitch catching my hand. It was silly to let him keep hold of it as we walked in, walked up the ramp, by the hostess station and to our table but I let him keep hold of it. First because his hold was strong and firm and it would take some effort to get my hand away. And second, and most important, because I’d just made a life-altering decision that was going to have a long-lasting effect on three lives, it scared the living daylights out of me and I needed a strong hand to hold onto.
* * * * *
It happened after the three course meal Mitch bought us.
It was after Billy had melted toward Mitch and they were thumb wrestling across the table. Billy was laughing which was something I hadn’t seen in a good long while. And Mitch was smiling at him like he knew it was something the boy didn’t do often and he liked it a lot that he was doing it now.
Mitch and I were side by side on a booth bench, the kids sat across from us on seats while we were eating. But now that we were done, Billie had left her seat to crawl in close to me, wrap herself around me, play with my ponytail and whisper girlie stuff to me.
It was at this time, after Mitch had asked for the bill and we were waiting for it, that the elderly woman walked to our table.
Mitch’s head turned and tipped back to look at her and when his did, so did Billy’s. I twisted my neck to look at her as well and Billie pressed deep to look around me so she could see her too.
But the woman only had eyes for me.
“Sorry to disturb you but I just wanted to say, you have the most beautiful family I’ve ever seen.” My heart stopped, she smiled big, touched Billy’s hair, a Billy who was staring up at her with his mouth wide open and then she looked back at me. “Kids are usually grouchy, everyone’s always snappy, fighting, loud, kids racing around. It’s nice to see a polite, happy, beautiful family for once.” She nodded to me and finished, “Keep up the good work.”
“Uh…” I mumbled.
“Thanks.” Mitch’s deep voice sounded.
She smiled at Mitch then Billie then Billy. She nodded to me again, turned and walked away.
I blinked repeatedly at her departing back.
“She was nice!” Billie declared exuberantly and my head turned to look at her smiling face.
“Yeah, baby, a very nice lady.”
“I’ve never been part of a beautiful family,” Billie stated.
I stared at her, my heart wrenched, my head turned again and I caught Mitch’s eyes just as his arm wrapped around my shoulders. He pulled me into his side and since Billie was in my arms she came with me.
Mitch leaned into us both so his face was close to Billie’s before he advised, “Live it up, gorgeous.”
“Yippee!” Billie cried.
“Hush, honey, that’s a little loud,” I whispered to her.
“I can’t live it up quiet,” she whispered loudly and logically back to me.