My world was rocked once again. But at least I’d gotten a few things off my chest.

Chapter Twenty-Three

Control

I walked around the park for over an hour, circling the grounds and even enjoying a hot chocolate with extra whipped cream from the vendor who passed through.

I’d messaged Julia, asking her to meet me, and by the time the sun was setting I was sitting next to her on a bench outside Haven. I’d refused to meet her inside; I wasn’t quite ready to involve Logan, whom I could see sitting at the bar, oblivious to the fact that I was near. I spotted only a broad back covered in a grey T-shirt and short hair with a slight wave, but I recognized him instantly as I stared through the large window in front of the sidewalk.

“So what’s up?” Julia asked, too cheerful for the conversation I was about to explore. But that didn’t stop me. Without peace of mind, I was practically crippled with ‘what if’s.

“I need to ask you something. And I know it’s not my business, but I just…I just need to understand.”

Her smile faltered but didn’t drop. “Sure, what is it?”

“I know about Logan being arrested for attacking a man with a bat. Do you know why he’d do that?”

Julia’s smile vanished that time, a tight frown its gloomy replacement. She was no longer relaxed and jovial; her entire posture had changed. From the look of it, I’d struck an unfriendly chord. She didn’t speak, staring down at her lap and fidgeting with her gloved hands. She crossed and uncrossed her legs, as though neither position was comfortable, then finally cleared her throat and looked over at me with a slight pink hue to her cheeks that wasn’t there before.

“Cassandra, I don’t want to go there. The charges were dropped. I just want to move on.”

My thoughts ran rampant, straight to my worst fear. The image of Kurt holding me down flashed across my mind, and my heart sank.

She’d been hurt. Attacked, maybe—raped?

“I’m so sorry.” Moisture struck my eyes as I spoke, my tone soft and sympathetic. Whatever had happened, Logan was obviously protecting his sister or making the guy pay for hurting her, which were both good-enough reasons for me. “I understand wanting to move on—”

“Wait!” she shrieked, her expression filled with horror. “Stop looking at me like that. I wasn’t hurt or anything. It wasn’t like that.”

“Oh, I just assumed—”

“Logan was pissed because I was sixteen and got a tattoo.”

“What?” My entire face scrunched.

She blew out a long, embarrassed groan. “It was in a back room at some lame party, and I ended up getting an infection. The tattoo artist was like fifty and brought everyone beer and pot. He did a bunch of work that night and said there was no charge for girls.”

“Sounds like a sleaze,” I mumbled.

Her cheeks flushed brighter. “I don’t know what I was thinking. Anyway, I had to go on antibiotics…which led to me having to tell my parents, who told Logan, who went apeshit.”

She lifted her jacket and shirt to reveal a bright-purple shape of what I guessed was supposed to be a butterfly, with crooked wings.

“Did he do it in the dark?” I blurted without thinking.

She dropped her jacket and puffed out an insulted sigh.

“Sorry,” I said, but my apology was too late. I couldn’t help it—that was the worst so-called butterfly I’d ever seen, and definitely qualified for some cover-up work.

“So I take it Logan hates tattoos?” My hand shot over my hip, where my own body art was hidden. Oh, I was in trouble.

“It wasn’t that. It was more the fact that his underage sister was drinking and smoking weed at a party, and then found herself in a dirty room getting an unsanitary tattoo from a man way too old to be there. It’s my own fault. I should have asked to make sure he was using a fresh needle, but I was drunk!”

“I'm understanding your brother’s rage a bit more.”

“My friend got one right before me and it looked cute. How was I supposed to know it would get infected? Luckily I didn’t catch any diseases, but it didn’t matter. Logan wouldn’t even look at me, he was so mad. It was right after we met Caleb, so they searched the guy out together and Logan broke his hands. The bat belonged to one of the guy’s buddies that tried to intervene. Long story short, Logan’s unstoppable when he’s pissed. Add in the fact that it had to do with his baby sister, and I’m sure you can paint your own picture of how things went down.”

“I sure can,” I muttered.

“You have to understand: Logan’s always looked out for me and Jax. And Natasha had just left him, so he wasn’t exactly a happy-go-lucky sort of guy.”

“Obviously.” I was at a loss, which had been happening a lot lately. I felt like a one-woman episode of CSI, but on rewind. Here I was, setting up meetings and questioning everyone about the man I thought I knew as well as he did me, yet I’d barely spoken to him over the past week. And even though he currently sat only thirty feet from me, it still felt worlds away.

“I felt like crap when he was arrested. Oliver was still a baby. It was Caleb that saved him from real jail time. He broke into the tattoo artist’s apartment and found some videos of the perv screwing around with some underage girls. One trip to the hospital later and all charges were dropped. As far as the tattoo, I’m waiting for Jax to cover it for me.”

“Waiting?”

“Yeah, till he saves up for some equipment. He wants to open his own shop one day. I’ll be his first customer.” She sounded proud, and her smile returned.

One day? It looked like twins didn’t tell each other everything. As much as I wanted to, now wasn’t the time to divulge that fact that Jax not only had high-end equipment stashed in his bedroom, but also that half the campus already comprised his clientele.

We sat for a few more minutes chatting about lighter topics, such as Oliver and how he was staying at his grandma’s until Monday night. Logan didn’t strike me as the type of father to allow his son to miss a day of school, which had me even more worried.

Did he know about the DA’s decision? Was that why he’d come home early—to see me? I might’ve felt better about his police record, but considering everything else happening, it didn’t matter.

After a quick goodbye to Julia, I entered Haven, still harboring some resentment for being thrown out of Logan’s house but ready to explain and work things through with him.

He needed me now more than ever, and I needed my man.

I stole a quick stop to the ladies’ room to pee and check my face, which was in dire need of under-eye concealer. I compromised by swiping on some clear lip gloss, then left the restroom and sneaked up to the bar.

But he wasn’t there. After surveying the room, I came up empty on seeing the broad shoulders and charming smirk I missed.

I snared a seat at the bar and flagged the bartender. He walked right over with a bright, welcoming smile in place. Surprisingly, it did wonders for my mood.

“Hey, what can I get you?”

“I'm looking for Logan. Is he still here?”

“Uh, yeah. I’m, ah, not sure where he went though. Give me a sec to check, all right?”