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"You can tell that Jack kid that Duchess is his dog now. Tell him..." Still not looking at me, he paused and drew a shaky breath. "Tell him she's a good dog and to take care of her."

Continuing to follow my intuition, I crossed the few feet between us and put my hand on his shoulder, almost exactly as I'd done the night he died. "You know it doesn't matter what you say or who you give her to, Duchess will always belong to you. When you died, she cried. I was there. I saw it. I didn't forget. I won't ever forget."

He didn't look at me, but slowly he dropped his bow to the ground and put his hand over mine. We just stood there like that. Touching but not saying anything. I was watching his face carefully, so I saw the entire transformation. As he pressed his hand over mine, he let out a long, slow breath, and his face relaxed. The last hint of red left his eyes, and the strange, shadowy darkness evaporated. When he finally looked at me, he was the kid I'd been so drawn to and who had died while I held him in my arms, listening to him tell me that he'd come back.

"What if there's nothing left in me worth loving?" He asked it in a voice so low that if I hadn't been standing close I wouldn't have heard him.

"I think you can still choose what you are, or at least what you are becoming. Stevie Rae chose her humanity over the monster. I think it's up to you."

I know what I did next was stupid. I'm not even sure why I did it. I mean, I already had unresolved issues with Erik and Heath. The last thing I needed was another boy complicating my life, but at that moment there was only Stark and me, and he was himself again--the guy who had agonized over the gift Nyx had given him because he had accidentally caused the death of his mentor; the guy who had been horrified at the thought of hurting anyone again. The guy I'd felt such an immediate and deep connection to I'd thought that just maybe there really were such thing as soul mates, and had considered, at least for a few brief moments, that he might be mine. That's all I was thinking about as I stepped into his arms. When he bent and hesitatingly pressed his lips to mine, I closed my eyes and kissed him softly and sweetly. He kissed me back, holding me so gently it was as if he thought I might break.

Then I felt him stiffen and he pulled away, taking a staggering step backwards. I was sure I saw tears in his eyes before he yelled, "You should have forgotten me!" Stark picked up his bow and bolted away into the roiling darkness of the stormy night.

When he was gone I stood there staring after him, wondering what the hell was wrong with me. How could I have kissed a guy who had been attacking someone just minutes before? How could I feel a connection to someone who might be more monster than man? Maybe I didn't even know myself anymore. I sure didn't know what I was becoming.

I shivered. The cold dampness of the night seemed to have settled through my clothes and skin and into my bones. And I felt tired. Really, really tired.

"Thank you, fire and air and water," I whispered to the listening elements. "You served me well to night. You may go now." Fog and ice swirled around me once, and then rushed away, leaving me alone with the night and the storm and my confusion. Wearily I trudged back to the dorm, wishing I could go inside, take a hot shower, and curl up in my bed to sleep for several days.

Naturally, my wish was no one's command...

Chapter Twenty-one

I'd barely touched the door when Darius opened it for me. His sharp look made me wonder if he'd been watching the scene between Stark and me, and I sincerely hoped he hadn't.

"Damien and the Twins are in there" was all he said, motioning for me to follow him into the central room of the dorm.

"First I need to borrow your cell phone," I said.

He didn't hesitate or ask annoying questions about who I needed to call and why. He simply handed me his phone, and then he walked ahead of me into the common room. I punched in Stevie Rae's number and held my breath while it rang. When she answered it sounded like she was talking into a tin can, but at least I could hear her.

"Hey, it's me," I said.

"Z! Dang, I'm glad to hear your voice! Are ya okay?"

"Yeah, I'm better."

"Yea! So what's going on with--"

"I'll fill you in on all that later," I cut her off. "Right now you gotta listen to me."

"'Kay," she said.

"Do what I told you to do."

There was a pause and then she said, "What you told me in the note?"

"Yeah. You're being watched in the tunnels. Something is down there with you."