“What does that even mean?” Ridley sounded taken aback.

“Because you’re in love with Juni,” I told him pointedly, as if I were accusing him of a crime.

“I never said that. I just started dating her, and that doesn’t even matter.” He brushed it off. “The point is that you’re acting insane right now.” I scoffed, so he continued. “Tilda is your friend, and you’re scared and pissed off and you’re taking it out on her for no good reason.”

I bristled. “I am not scared.”

“You are,” he insisted. “You’re scared of losing her, that she won’t be able to work with you as much anymore. But what I think is really bothering you right now is that the King wants you to go kill Konstantin, and you’re not sure if you can.”

“That’s…” I shifted on the bench and shook my head. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I know exactly what I’m talking about.” He leaned forward, trying to get me to look at him, but I refused. “I know you, Bryn.”

My shoulders sagged, and I hung my head low, staring down at the cracked tiles of the locker room floor. I put my head in my hands and let out a long, shaky breath.

“I don’t want to kill him. I should, and I know I should, but I don’t.”

“I know,” he said. “I may not understand why, since I’d give anything to kill the man that killed my father, but I know that this is how you feel.”

I lifted my head to meet his gaze, so he could see that I meant it. “I just want to make sure the right person pays for the right crime, and … I don’t think that’s Konstantin.” I groaned, realizing how foolish it sounded. “What’s wrong with me?”

“Nothing,” Ridley assured me. “You just have strong convictions, and you want to do the right thing.”

“Are you going out on the mission?”

He shook his head. “No. The King wants me to stay back.” He studied me for a minute, then asked, “If you were to see him, would you kill Konstantin?”

Without hesitation, I answered, “The King ordered me to do something. I am a tracker, a member of the King’s court, and I took an oath that I would follow all the orders he gives me. So yes, I will do what’s required of me.”

TWENTY-FIVE

motives

Konstantin’s gray eyes stared back at me, unyielding, unforgiving. It was his first official photo when he’d joined the Högdragen, in full color on the top page of his file. He’d been younger then, clean-shaven, skin smooth, but unsmiling. The Högdragen were never supposed to smile, not when they were working.

It was strange because in the picture he looked harder than he did now. The years on the run had taken their toll on him, definitely, but he’d softened somehow.

I wish I could know what had changed between the time that proud young man had been photographed in his crisp uniform, and the night he’d run my father through with his sword.

After Ridley had confronted me in the locker room, I’d changed and gone back to apologize to Tilda, but she was already gone. But that might be for the best. She could probably use some space before I went to her and owned up to how unfair and cruel I’d been.

Ridley had gone off to take care of some pressing Rektor business with another tracker, so I took the opportunity to sneak in and grab Konstantin Black’s file from the cabinet behind his desk. Technically, anybody was allowed to look at Konstantin’s file, since he was a wanted man, so I had no need to sneak, but I didn’t want to talk to Ridley about it. At least not right now.

I sat cross-legged on my bed with Konstantin’s file spread out before me, hoping that it would give some kind of insight that would help me figure out what happened and what was going on.

But so far there wasn’t anything that I didn’t already know. His father had died when he was very young, and he’d been raised by his mother, who died around the time he joined tracker school. He’d graduated at the top of his tracker class, and he went on to successfully bring in 98 percent of the changelings he was assigned to in the eight years he worked as a tracker.

He joined the Högdragen at the age of twenty-three immediately following his retirement from tracking. He’d transitioned seamlessly into their ranks, rising quickly because of his diligence and charm. Shortly after Mina married the King, she’d appointed Konstantin as her guard, where he’d risen to even greater prominence.

Everything in his file showed him as a loyal, intelligent hard worker, even if he was occasionally noted for his pride. If he was arrogant, it seemed justified. He gave a superior performance at his job, and he was beloved by the people.

In every one of the King’s Games Konstantin had competed in, he’d walked away with top honors. He was a hero to the people, and a loyal servant to the King and Queen.

That was it. That was all that was in his file. Just accolades and praise, up until the night he attempted to kill my father. Then there was a report explaining the incident and that Konstantin had disappeared in the night’s snow.

But there had to be something more. Something I was missing that would make him change so drastically. From a guard full of swagger and promise to a traitor on the run, humbled and worn.

Ember’s footsteps pounding up the stairs to my loft interrupted my thoughts, and I scrambled to put everything back in the file. I’d just shoved it underneath my blankets when Ember threw open the door.