Needless to say, we got plastered and men like it when women get plastered. Therefore, Tack took off with Ty-Ty in tow so they could enjoy her being drunk in their house in the mountains. Hawk showed and guided his tipsy wife and Elvira to his SUV while Elvira talked on the phone with Malik, which meant Malik was going to catch the hint his woman was blotto and I figured he’d meet her at her house in order to take advantage.

As for me, I kept drinking and enjoying my time with the guys until High showed. Although I was inebriated, it looked to me like Hop gave him a signal and High somehow managed to talk the other boys away from the bar and off on some Chaos errand.

Alone in the Compound with Hop, he wasted no time leading me to his room, where we had wild, crazy, drunken sex (okay, that last bit was just me) and it… was… fabulous. More fabulous now since Hop’s visit to the clinic brought good news. He could go “ungloved,” which meant it was just him and me with nothing in between.

I promptly passed out, only to be awoken by my man forty-five minutes ago, whereupon he made sweet, slow love to me.

It was debatable but that might have been more fabulous.

I was slightly hungover.

I was also not-so-slightly happy.

“How did I find Chaos?” Hop asked and I grinned at him.

“Yeah.”

“Tack came to a show.”

I tipped my head to the side. “What?”

“When I was still with the band, Tack came to a show. My family’s from Nevada. Mom and Dad still live there but Bog put out feelers everywhere so we got gigs in Denver. After a show, Tack came up to me and told me he dug what we did. Liked him, he seemed solid, and it was cool he went out of his way to say that shit to me. When I quit the band, I thought about where I wanted to land and by that time, even though I was only twenty-four, I had a lot of miles in. Place I liked best was Denver. Came here, remembered Tack. Not hard to miss, seein’ as he was wearin’ his cut, that he was in a Club and I rode into town on a bike. Seemed a fit. Sought him out, told him I left the band, he told me about Chaos. Invited me to a bash. I went.” He smiled. “The rest is history.”

“So you’ve been in the Club since you were twenty-four?” I asked.

“By the time I got here, made the decision, finished my time as a grunt, full membership at twenty-seven.”

“And you never looked back,” I noted.

The ease of our post-making love morning drifted from his face when he replied, “Never looked back.”

“What’s that?” I queried.

“What?”

“That look on your face,” I explained, and he hesitated before he rolled us. I had been lying on him. Hop situated us so I was on my back and he’d pressed his front to my side, his hand splayed on my belly.

“Tack didn’t invite me to join so much as recruited me,” he stated in a way that sounded weirdly like a confession and I felt my eyebrows draw together.

“I don’t get it. I mean, aren’t all the guys recruited?”

“Not for what Tack recruited me.”

I knew from his tone and the look on his face, our happy morning seemed to have gone south somehow.

I just didn’t get it.

“What are you saying?” I asked hesitantly, not wanting our morning to go south and not really sure I wanted to know what he was saying.

“What I’m sayin’ is, the Club was different back then. You and me, we stay solid, you’re brought officially into the fold as an old lady when we let out the news about us, you’ll hear talk.” He studied me a moment before finishing, “You might have already heard it.”

“I haven’t already heard it,” I shared. “How was the Club different?”

“They were into some serious bad shit then.”

Oh dear.

I was right. I didn’t want to know.

Still, I had to.

So I pushed. “What kind of serious bad shit?”

“Seriously serious bad shit,” Hop evaded.

“Hop—”

“Lanie.” He lifted a hand and cupped my cheek. “It was not good. What it is, is over.”

“I think maybe I need to understand this,” I told him though I didn’t think I needed that. But I knew, if we went the distance, I’d have to know.

“I think maybe you need to trust me that you don’t.”

“So what if I hear talk?” I pressed.

“You’ll know it’s over.”

“Hop—” I began and his face suddenly got closer.

“Drugs,” he bit out, the word sharp but almost strangled, like he had his own monster who’d dragged it out of him and he had no control, no way to hold it back.

I gasped and he continued. “And girls. Seriously bad shit, lady. Seriously bad shit that Tack wanted nothin’ to do with. He wasn’t president back then but that didn’t mean he didn’t have an exit plan for the Club on all that shit. He also had patience. A lot of it. And part of his plan was not only workin’ behind the scenes to turn brothers to his mission but also to recruit brothers who would fight his side. I was one of the brothers he recruited. Dog and Brick, too. It took time and the takeover was hostile. It was a dark time for the Club but Tack planned for that, too. He led us to the light and that’s where we are now, Lanie. Swear to Christ. We’re in the light.”

“Drugs and girls?” I asked breathlessly.

“It’s over.”

“Girls?” My voice was pitching higher.

“Baby,” his hand pressed into my face, “it’s over.”

“So, if it’s over, what about Benito?” I asked.

“I already told you, not talkin’ about Benito and you gotta trust me on that, too.”

“Hop—”

He interrupted me this time by rolling full on top of me and framing my head in both hands.

“This shit… fuck,” he ground out, paused and his face betrayed an inner battle before he continued, “you gotta know. You asked, this is part of me but this shit, I didn’t wanna tell you until later. But you asked so here it is. When I got in the Club, we were into that shit. You became a brother, you did your duty to the Club, and part of my duties was that shit.”

Suddenly, something High said weeks before penetrated.

“Exactly what part of that shit did you do?” I asked.