Cass usually called after dinner, when I was already long gone out the door to another “cheerleading meeting,” or on the weekends, when I was locked in the darkroom or with Rogerson. But one late Sunday afternoon I was the only one home when the phone rang. “Caitlin?” It was so strange to hear her voice, and I felt myself catch my breath. But I didn't say anything. “Caitlin. It's me,” she said. She sounded so far away. “It's Cass. I can't believe you're finally there when I called. How are you?” I swallowed, hard, and looked out the window. I could see Boo in her backyard, misting a row of ferns. “Caitlin.” She sounded confused. “Hello?” I ran a finger up and over my neck, feeling down to the spot below my collar where I'd hit the top of my seat belt the night before when Rogerson had pushed me. I pressed down on the bruise: It didn't hurt that badly. I was learning even the smallest push could bring a swelling, blue-​black spot, the body infinitely more dramatic than it needed to be. “Hello?” she said again, and I closed my eyes. “Caitlin? Are you there?”

I could see her in my mind, that time on the Lamont Whipper Show, ducking her head and smiling as she wrote something on her clipboard, and the way she glanced up for that one second, like she was looking right at me. Like she could see me, sitting on Corinna's couch, stoned and lost. “I understand if you're upset with me,” she said, suddenly. “But I had to leave. My whole future had been planned but it wasn't what I wanted. It was like I had no choice anymore. That's a terrible feeling, Caitlin.” I could see her reaching out with a finger, smoothing over the scar, and sighing. She looks just like you, Corinna had said. She could be you. “Caitlin?” Cass said, and I turned away from the window, looking down the stairs and out the front door, trying to picture her making that walk away from this. It seemed like so far, and I was so tired. Tired of keeping time, of studying faces, of hiding bruises. Of disappearing, bit by bit, while my world kept going without me, even as I slipped farther beneath the water, drowning. “Come on,” she whispered. “Talk to me.” I wanted to. But the words just wouldn't come. And when I hung up, she didn't call back.

The next day, when I pulled up to Corinna's after school, the front door was open. As soon as I stepped into the living room, I could hear them. “I just don't understand why you took the money out,” Corinna was saying. “This was, like, our last chance with them.”

“It'll be all right,” I heard Dave say. “Calm down. We'll get the money.”

“How? Tell me.”

“I told you I know that guy at the auto shop. He said to come in anytime, he'd hire me. I'll go tomorrow. It's no big deal.” Corinna sighed, loudly, and I heard her bracelets jingle. I stepped back out on the porch, easing the door shut behind me. Mingus, lying next to the rocking chair, closed his eyes as I leaned over to scratch his ears. “They needed the rent today, David,” Corinna said. “The check bounced last week.”

“I thought we had it covered.”

“We would have if you hadn't taken the money out,” she said, exasperated. “I mean, we've talked about this. More than once.”

“I told you, Corinna,” Dave said, and now he sounded irritated, “I needed it. Okay?”

“Just like you needed the power bill money. And the money I set aside for Mingus to go to the vet.”

Corinna strode into the living room, snatched her cigarettes off the table, and then walked back through the swinging door to the kitchen. "David, I'm working my butt off in this crappy job for that money.

There's no way I can do more than I'm already doing. And we'll never get to California if we don't start“ ”Oh, man,“ Dave said. ”Don't bring that California shit up again."

“Well, if you could just find a way to bring in some money we could save up enough ”

“I knew it,” Dave said angrily, his voice rising. Mingus lifted his head. “It always comes back to me. I can't keep a job, I can't bring home the money you need for La-​La Land. Well, Corinna, I'm sorry I'm such a failure to you. I guess your mom was right, huh?“ ”David, no,“ Corinna said, and her voice sounded choked. ”It's just that we'd do better if you could just“ ”You don't seem to have any trouble smoking the pot I get for you,“ Dave went on. I felt uncomfortable: I'd never heard him yell before. ”You take that with no problem. But you want me to go work at the Fast Fare for six bucks an hour before taxes just so you can take the damn dog to the vet?“ ”I don't want us to have to struggle so much,” Corinna said, and now I could tell she was crying. I remembered how they'd looked that day in the kitchen, dancing around the dog bowl, how happy she'd been. So in love, like I imagined Cass was. Like I wanted to be.

“Well, I'm sorry I can't give you everything you want,” Dave said, and I could tell he was coming closer even before he pushed the kitchen door open with a bang. I tried to step out of sight but he saw me, stopping suddenly in front of the TV. “Ohhey, Caitlin.”

“Hi,” I said, as Mingus wagged his tail beside me, thumping against the porch. “I was just” Corinna stepped out of the kitchen, her arms crossed against her chest. Her face was streaked with tears and she wouldn't look at me. “Caitlin,” she said, tucking her hair behind her ear, “this isn't a good time, okay?” They were both just standing there, and I suddenly felt stupid and helpless, like I didn't belong anywhere. “Yeah,” I said. “Sure. I'll just, um, see you later.” I turned around and started down the steps, and Mingus followed me across the yard. He ran behind my car all the way down the bumpy dirt road, stopping to sit by the mailbox, as if he knew he couldn't go any farther. After I turned onto the highway I looked back and could barely make him out in the settling dust, watching me as I left him behind.