Page 113

"I know you didn't see Jack up there, but are you saying that you believe there are places in the Otherworld that are specific to each of us?" I thought about it for a second, and then nodded. "Yeah, I think that's a good way of describing it. Jack is probably in the arts and crafts section." Damien smiled through his tears. "He wanted to be a fashion designer. He's in the Project Runway section."

"Oooh! Nice section," I heard from somewhere behind me and a few kids laughed softly.

Hesitantly, Aurox's hand went up. After Thanatos called his name, he turned so that he could meet my gaze. "You said there are different parts of the Otherworld. Do you think there is a part that is a place of punishment?"

His strange, moon-colored eyes were filled with an unspoken anguish, and I knew his question came from a place that was deeper than curiosity and that my answer would mean more than just providing random school information. Please, Nyx give me the words; let my answer be true.

I drew a long breath and found spirit within me. I held to the element that was closest to my heart and trusted that through it my Goddess would guide my words. As I started speaking I noticed how quiet it had gotten in the room and I could practically feel the back-row kids holding their breaths.

"I saw things in the Otherworld that were scary and not nice, but they were outside forces and not from the Goddess. Did I see a place of punishment? No, but what I did see was Heath moving on to another realm of the Otherworld. He believed he was going to be reborn from that part of the realm. While he was leaving he told me that, even though he was moving on, our love stayed with him." I paused and had to blink hard and wipe at one tear that had somehow escaped. "What my gut tells me is that Nyx isn't a Goddess of punishment, but it wouldn't surprise me if really hateful people are reborn in a way that either makes up for the awfulness of their past lives, or teaches them something they didn't learn before."

"You mean like someone who was a wife beater gets reborn as a woman?" Shaunee said.

"How about as a woman in a burka in Afghanistan?" Aphrodite added with a sarcastic lift of an eyebrow.

"Yeah, that is kinda what I mean," I said. "But I think the what and where and who would be up to the Goddess."

"Do you think it's ever up to the person?" Aurox asked me.

"I hope so," I said earnestly, thinking of Heath and my mom.

"So, knowing beyond any doubt that there is an Otherworld and that our loved ones can find their way to it, even if they aren't vampyres, or even fledglings, is some comfort to us as we outlive the mortals in our lives. That does not mean losing a parent is ever easy. Zoey, I know this is painful, but could you share with us what it is that is most difficult for you about your mother's death?" I nodded and opened my mouth to say something about the fact that now she can't ever make up for the way she un-mom-ed me over the past three years, but the words wouldn't come.

"Take your time," Thanatos said.

Stevie Rae reached over and took my hand. Squeezing it, she whispered, "It's okay, just pretend like there's no one here except us. You can tell me."

I looked at my BFF and blurted, "It's so awful that I don't know what really happened to her."

"Why do you think that is what saddens you the most?"

From the stage Thanatos asked the question, but I kept looking at Stevie Rae. She smiled and said, "How come it would be better if you knew what happened to your momma?"

"Because someone needs to pay for what was done to her," I told my BFF.

"Vengeance?" Thanatos asked.

Then I did look at her. "No. Justice," I said firmly.

"It is admirable as well as understandable for you to desire justice. Let this be a lesson to the rest of you-there is a distinct difference between wanting to gain revenge and exact vengeance, and wanting the truth to shine forth so that justice for all is ill uminated." Thanatos met my gaze. "I believe I can help give you the truth, so that you will be able to get justice for your mother and closure for yourself."

"What do you mean?"

"I spoke with your grandmother. Today is the fifth night after your mother's death. I explained to her that five is an important number in our belief system-it represents the elements and our closeness to them. She has agreed to pause her traditional cleansing on this, the fifth night. It is not a certainty, but with the elemental power held by your circle and your connection to the one whose death we seek to reveal, I believe I can ill uminate the truth of your mother's murder if you are willing to cast your circle and witness what it reveals."