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“I know you’re hurting now, but there are things to be thankful for. You’ll find the love of your show again once you’re in a better place emotionally. You have your friends and family, a great house, a lot of talent. You have your health.”
His health. Luc laughed bitterly. He had more than that.
“Dr. Kimjin called me this morning.”
Deke entered the room and stood behind his wife’s chair, a casual hand on her shoulder. “Is he the doctor who tested you last week in L.A.?”
Luc nodded. The man’s words still rang in his ears.
“And?”
“In his words, me impregnating Alyssa isn’t virtually impossible. He classified it as challenging but not impossible at all. Apparently, in the last nine years, my body healed some on its own and my sperm count increased enough to make my chances of impregnating someone much greater. He was still surprised we’d managed it without fertility drugs or surgical intervention. But he affirmed what I’d already figured out: It’s entirely possible the baby is mine. In fact, I’m sure it is.”
“That’s great, man!” Deke enthused. “Wow.”
“Dr. Kimjin said that if my previous physician hadn’t told me it was possible my body could heal, he’d done me a disservice.”
“And I take it he didn’t tell you?” his cousin asked.
“Not a word. I wish to hell I’d seen another doctor and gotten tested sooner.”
“But now you know.” Kimber’s face softened. “Are you going to tell Alyssa?”
Luc scoffed. “How? She’s changed every lock, every phone number. Even her e-mail account. She won’t see me or talk to me. After putting her trust in a lying scumbag when she was younger and experiencing a horrific outcome, I’m not surprised that she wants nothing to do with someone else she sees as a betrayer.”
“But you love her,” Kimber argued.
Yeah, he did. So much that he knew he’d never be whole without her. But his feelings didn’t change a damn thing.
Just then, the doorbell rang, and Kimber jumped up. “I’ll get it.”
In her ensuing absence, Deke stared. “Man, you got to get it together and go after her. The longer you stay away, the easier it is for her to convince herself that she was right and you don’t give a shit about her.”
Luc jumped to his feet. “What the fuck would you have me do? The last time I was there, I practically stalked her just to see her face. I didn’t even get to talk to her.”
Deke scratched the back of his neck. “Did you send her flowers?”
Given the fact he’d sent them to her with a polite note after the first night he’d spent with her, the one in which he was supposed to share her with Deke? “She’d see it as a kiss-off, not a romantic gesture. Besides, I told her I love her. I’m not sure she doubts that as much as she doubts that I want her more than the baby.”
“Do you?” Deke’s raised brows conveyed his shock without a word.
Luc nodded without hesitation. “For the last few years, I knew my life was incomplete and, not knowing what was missing, I assumed it was fatherhood—the one thing I’d never experience, right? After Dr. Kimjin’s call, I tried to figure out why I wasn’t more thankful, more relieved. All these years I spent assuming that being a father would complete me, fill the void I was physically incapable of fulfilling. It’s human nature to want what you can’t have.”
“But you realized that what was missing was just a significant someone with whom to share to your life.” Deke didn’t ask; he knew.
“Yeah. How fucking stupid could I be? Fatherhood will be great, and I’ll always love this baby with all my heart. But I’ll love its mother until the day I die, and it’s killing me that I can’t see her one more time and try to convince her that she’s my everything. The person I’ve been seeking for years and I just didn’t know it.”
“Luc, there’s someone at the door for you,” Kimber said softly, then bit her lip. “I tried to tell them you were busy, but . . . he’s insisting he talk to you.”
“Reporter?”
Her gaze skirted away. “No.”
Alarm skittered through Luc as he put one foot in front of the other and made his way out of the kitchen. The walk seemed to take forever, and he feared what awaited him at its end. If this was a simple delivery, Kimber would have handled it. Hell, she would have met his gaze.
He reached the door, his movements seemingly in slow motion even though his heart was racing like a maxed-out, turbocharged engine. Finally, he pulled it open and stared at the clean-shaven, fortysomething suit standing in front of him. The man’s face was somewhere between businesslike and grim.
Luc swallowed.
“Are you Luc Traverson?” the man asked.
Unable to find his voice, Luc just nodded.
“I’ve got some papers for you. Please sign here.” He thrust a clipboard at Luc.
Papers. Ominous. He feared he knew what kind of papers these were. God, he couldn’t even think about them, much less accept them.
Shaking his head, Luc stepped back. “What kind of papers?”
“I’m not privy to that information, sir. My job is simply to deliver them.”
“No.” Luc didn’t want to know what was inside the thick white envelope tucked under the man’s arm.
“Sir, you have to take the papers.”
Luc couldn’t get a grip on his breathing. His heart skittered, stuttered. He shook his head.
Deke approached him from behind and clapped him on the shoulder. “Sign, buddy. We’ll deal with whatever’s in there. I promise.”
Was that even a promise Deke could keep? Luc wasn’t sure he could deal with it.
“Sir, please.” The messenger thrust the clipboard in his direction again.
“It’s okay,” Deke whispered in his ear.
No, it wasn’t, but burying his head in the sand wasn’t going to make it go away. Damn it.
With numb fingers, he grabbed the board and pen.
“Sign here.” The man pointed.
Luc’s heart sank as he did and accepted the big white envelope. Somehow, he just knew his life was over.
Faintly, he heard Deke mutter something polite and shut the door.
Deke grabbed him by the elbow and hauled him up. “Let’s go back to the kitchen and sit down.”
Luc was stunned to realize he was on his knees. Literally.
As he stumbled to his feet again, Deke guided him back to his chair. The corner of the envelope cut into his palm, and the feeling that he’d lost everything wound through his blood like poison. The pity on Kimber’s face was an arrow to his chest. They all knew what he knew. Luc closed his eyes as pain dismantled him one cell at a time.
Finally, he lurched into his chair. Deke pulled up one beside him.
“Open it.”
“No.” It would hurt too fucking much.
“This may be something from the network.”
Luc shook his head. “They’d contact my agent first.”
“Maybe it’s a written report from Dr. Kimjin.”
“He just received the results this morning. Besides, why not just fax them?”
“You still have to open it.” Deke’s gravelly voice grated on his brain.
“Would you fucking open it if you were in my shoes? If you were pretty sure the envelope contained the end of your marriage and your happiness, would you really just launch into it like it was any other piece of mail?”
Deke shot his wife a glance. His cousin’s face was rife with love, and it almost pained Luc to see them so happy. He wanted the best for them, but if even fucked-up Deke had figured out how much Kimber meant to him and managed to share a life with her, Luc wondered why the hell hadn’t he figured out sooner that he wanted the same with Alyssa. That he wanted it all with her.
“I’d probably down a bottle of Jack first, but I’d face reality. The Luc I know would, too.”
Luc scoffed, trying to hold tears at bay. He didn’t succeed. The little drops were like a pickax to the back of his eyes. His throat tightened. “I hate Jack Daniel’s.”
“Well, since you haven’t been around much, we haven’t kept any of your fancy cabernet sauvignon on hand. It’s either Jack or sober.”
“Fuck.” Releasing a shuddering breath, he gripped the envelope. “Sober.”
With dread sinking his heart, Luc edged his fingers under the sealed flap of the thick envelope and tore it open. His fingers shook as he withdrew the thick document inside. Big words in a fancy script jumped out at him, stabbing him in the heart.
Ending his hopes of happiness forever.
“What does it say?” Kimber whispered.
He swallowed, but his voice was still scratchy and uneven as he read, “Petition for marital annulment.”
Chapter Nineteen
ALYSSA entered her house with a tired sigh, avoiding her bare ring finger and its meaning, and looked at her watch. Nearly one a.m. Luc should have received the annulment papers by now, likely hours ago. She’d half expected him to call Bonheur tonight and demand to talk to her. Silence. Or be waiting in her driveway when she arrived home. No one. Nibbling on a ragged fingernail, she wondered what that meant. Would he go along with the process and grant her the legal end of their marriage, as if it had never taken place?
She hoped so. Sort of. Well, that was what she should want. He’d deceived her and may never care about her the way she cared about him. Granted, his “not caring” always made her feel special, but she had no way of knowing if his tenderness was an act. And she didn’t want to blindly trust him, then wake up one day and realize—too late—that she’d put her faith in someone who would rip her world apart and stab her in the heart.
Someone like Joshua.
Telling Luc about her past had been cathartic. And though difficult, it had seemingly brought them closer together. The fact she’d misjudged the situation only made her more determined to end things now. If she stayed, she’d only get in deeper, and that mistake could be catastrophic.
Though it hurt damn bad, it was better this way. Or would be someday, she supposed. Now, drawing another breath, putting one foot in front of the other, was hell. Alyssa wasn’t eating as well as she should. What little she managed to choke down was for the baby’s sake. And sleep . . . It just wasn’t happening without Luc’s hot, protective body next to her. Alyssa knew she was burning her candle at both ends, running herself ragged trying to get a restaurant off the ground, deal with the insurance adjusters and contractors to rebuild Sexy Sirens . . . while trying to forget Luc. But the life growing inside her was a constant reminder of her husband. Even without the baby, she doubted she’d ever get over him.
After locking the front door, she turned on a nearby lamp that provided just enough golden glow for her to trudge up the stairs. Her heels clicked on the hardwood floors in the shadowed hallway to her bedroom.
All at once, she remembered that her alarm hadn’t sounded when she’d walked in the house. Had she forgotten to set it this morning? And her bedroom door was closed. Alyssa frowned. The lack of sleep and nourishment must be catching up to her. Other women told her that pregnancy had a way of making a girl fo rgetful.
Still, she never shut that door when she left. She always wanted to know what—or who—awaited her in her room before she walked in. Something else Joshua had taught her.
Was it possible Luc was waiting for her on the other side of the door? He had a way of melting her defenses with his surprises.
The possibility pumped her full of excitement. They were supposed to be ending their marriage, but she’d be lying if she said she hadn’t missed him with every breath she took. She wasn’t sure how he’d gotten into the house. After all, she’d changed the locks. Then again, he knew Jack and Hunter, and those two could break into Area 51, wrapped inside Fort Knox, surrounded by the White House.
With a sigh and a stomach tightening in knots, Alyssa pushed the door open, hoping to see that Luc had decorated the bedroom like a fantasy honeymoon suite.
But no. Instead, ropes had been tied to the bedposts at each corner, leaving loops at the ends for wrists and ankles. She gasped, bile rising in her throat.
Blinking, her breath thin, Alyssa stared in horror. What the hell? Luc knew better than almost anyone that she could not endure bondage. Why on earth would he put her through this? To prove that she could, in fact, trust him? If he wanted to reconcile, threatening to tie her to the bed wasn’t the way to persuade her to give their marriage another try.
Anger set in. Where was the son of a bitch? In the bathroom? Closet? Hiding because he knew she was going to take a strip out of his hide for this shit?
As she turned toward the bathroom, acid nearly dripped from her tongue. Then she caught sight of who awaited her.
It wasn’t Luc who leaned against the wall, jacket stripped off, tie loose, smirk firmly in place.