“We?” I sent Cross a look, raising my eyebrow.

He coughed. “I mentioned you could do with a fun evening.” He gestured back to Jordan. “They said they’d cover it.”

“We did.” Zellman was almost beaming next to me. He crossed his arms over his chest, and his skinny jeans slipped down a bit. “We thought of the best idea, and that’s where we’ve been just now.”

“Thinking of the idea?”

“What?” He scratched behind his ear. “No. Not that.” He laughed. “But funny, though.”

Jordan took a big bite from the apple. “We’re going on a road trip!”

“Yeah, yeah.” Zellman leaned forward. “And we cleared it with the Mom and Pops.”

I felt the blood drain from my face. “Mom and Pops?”

Zellman’s eyebrows bunched together. “You know, Heather.” He indicated behind me, toward the bar. “And your brother. He knows we’re coming to get you. He agreed with us.”

“He did?”

My jaw was on the floor. I could’ve used it to sweep the floor.

Things were better with Channing. I didn’t ignore him when he talked to me now. But we had a long way to go.

“He did.” Zellman unfolded his arms and clapped me on the back. “Grab your tits! Let’s go.”

Jordan and Z headed back through the door. Only Cross registered the statement, and he waited until the door closed behind them. “If Alex Ryerson had said that, he’d be impaled with a knife already.”

I laughed, but my pulse had started to speed up. It was Cross and me again. We were alone. In a room.

I was already hot and bothered.

“I’ve heard him say the same thing to you.” That was Zellman’s phrase when he wasn’t thinking, was distracted by something else going on. “He doesn’t register that I actually have tits.”

Cross looked me up and down, lingering on my lips. “I’ve never had any trouble registering that.” He started toward me, but halted abruptly. He eyes dropped to my tits. “Yeah. Too soon here.” Walking backward, he winked as his back hit the screen door. “And just so we’re clear, I’m intending to grab your tits someday. I’ve been intending for a long time.”

He backed out and was off toward the guys.

A whole flurry of nerves, excitement, thrill, and fear plunged through me at breakneck speed. I took a moment for myself before I followed him out the door.

I’d known this side of Cross existed. He got the girls, and plenty of them—but being on the receiving end? Whoa.

I wasn’t sure I was prepared for what we were apparently going to do, but then I imagined the graze of his lips over mine again, and I knew. The train had already left the station. There was no going back.

Outside, Cross tried to go to his truck, but Jordan wasn’t having it.

He flung open the back door to his four-door pickup. “Come on.” He jerked his head toward the back. “I switched vehicles so we could do this crew style. You know what I mean.”

Which meant we were going all together.

Jordan got in, and Zellman lingered by the passenger door. When we did these trips, he usually sat in the back with either Cross or me. Sometimes I sat up front, but I usually sat in the back with Z. It was a hierarchy thing. Jordan drove because he thought he was the leader. Cross and I were on equal footing, though Cross might’ve been higher than me, but Zellman was the bottom. I didn’t understand who’d made up the hierarchy, but that’s how it was except no one cared much about it besides Jordan. However, on trips like this, Z always wanted to sit up front with Jordan.

Both Cross and I knew what he was going to ask as he pointed to the seat with his thumb. “Do you guys mind…”

“No,” Cross spoke for us. “Go for it.”

A huge smile broke out, and he hopped in, all gangly like.

“You okay with this trip?” Cross asked me before we got in.

I looked back over my shoulder. Channing hadn’t come into the kitchen, and neither had Scratch, but I guessed they knew. Jordan said he’d gotten it cleared, and I trusted him. He wouldn’t lie about something like that.

Then why did I feel weird? I studied Cross for a moment. This didn’t feel like him.

It was… I twisted back around to look at Tuesday Tits.

It hit me like a lightbulb going on—I didn’t want to let Channing down. I didn’t want to skip out if I really wasn’t supposed to go. As soon as I thought it, I started laughing. Relief flooded me, and I patted Cross on the arm.

“I’m good.” I moved toward the truck.

“You sure?” Cross went to the door behind Jordan, still watching me round the truck.

I nodded, a stupid and happy smile on my face. Even that felt weird. What the fuck was going on with me? But I felt lighter.

I got inside and closed my eyes as I felt the pickup start forward.

Normal Bren would’ve ditched without a second thought, but this new Bren, she was starting to care. And that should’ve worried me. It probably would later, but for now…

I looked at Cross. He’d been watching me, a confused look pulling his eyebrows together.

For now, I was okay.

“Can we talk about the elephant in the room?” Jordan asked.

He leaned forward to turn the music down. Radiohead had been filling the cab for the last hour and a half.

Cross and I shared a look.

“What elephant?” Cross grabbed the back of the seat in front of him and leaned forward. “What are you talking about?”

Jordan looked at us in the rearview mirror, focusing more on Cross. “I have to tell you something, and I’m wondering when’s the best time.”

Cross released their seat. He shifted a little closer to me, but he remained on his side. I stayed on mine.

My stomach was in knots.

What if we let people know about us and something happened to tear us apart? I didn’t know what or how, but it could happen. Hell, just life itself could do it. If I was happy, really happy, I was bound to lose him.

That thought dried my throat.

That couldn’t happen.

I didn’t even have him, and I was preparing for when I’d lose him. There was something wrong in that, but I couldn’t focus for a moment.

Cross’ hand covered mine. “Hey.”

I ripped my hand away from his. “Don’t!” I hissed.

I gritted my teeth. Shit. There it was. He’d be hurt. He’d be angry. I’d offended him. But I looked up, and nothing like that was there.

Instead, he wore his slight grin, and he pointed to Jordan. “The leader is speaking to you.”

“Shut up!” Jordan burst out. “You give me shit, but no one else is stepping up to the plate.”

“But how could we?” Cross sat forward, resting his arm on the back of their seat. “You’ve got all the bases covered. There’s no room. And how would we even step up? Mutiny?” Cross hit Zellman’s shoulder with the back of his hand. “Would I have to recruit Z here? Maybe bribe him with a hundred bucks?”

“A hundred bucks? I’m more expensive than that.” Zellman shook his head.

“A hundred strippers?” Cross asked.

“Yeah.” Zellman bobbed his head, laughing. “I’d fold for a hundred strippers. Pussy heaven.”

“Hold your tits, Z.” Cross grinned.

Zellman tipped his head back, his grin widening. “Hold their tits, you mean?”

Jordan shook his head, grumbling, “You guys are stupid. You give me crap, but I have a role. I fulfill it.”

“What role is that?” I asked. “Our mouthpiece?”

“Yeah,” he shot back, watching me in the rearview mirror. “I step up. I defend you guys. You all are so damned quiet. Someone has to talk.”

Z was still grinning, shaking his head.

“So you fill the silence?” I asked. “That’s what you’re saying?”

Jordan was half-grinning now too. “I know, I know. You guys step up. If I weren’t around, you’d all be just fine, but stop giving me so much crap. I like to take charge. Sue me, but for real—I gotta say something here. You have to know.”

Z turned sideways, resting his arm on the back of the seat. “You’ve been spending a lot of time together, you two.”

I glanced at Cross. A foreboding expression pulled down his eyebrows. His mouth was in a flat line.

I nodded. “Yeah. Why?”