“Hey!” Zellman stepped forward, his hands balled into fists and his shaggy hair standing up as if a bird was trying to build a nest in it. “Back off. Alex had no business touching her. He was told this morning to keep his hands off. He ignored that warning tonight.”

The redness on Channing’s neck faded, but his jaw remained clenched.

“That true?” he asked me.

I narrowed my eyes. Fuck him. He knew it was true.

Cross moved forward. “What’s Heather going to do?”

Channing stared at me a moment longer before saying, “Nothing. Your crew started it. If someone presses charges, no judge is going to care that Ryerson touched Bren against her will. There’s no justification for your response to that.”

But there was in the system. Channing let out a small sigh and moved back a step. It was the break in tension we needed.

“I’m sorry, Bren.”

I looked at my brother and saw he meant it. But my anger still burned. I could only clip my head in a tight nod.

He should know someone touching me against my will would set me off. But the sad part was, he didn’t.

The new guy was watching me, a captive audience. I looked at him, but he didn’t turn away. There was no shame in his gawking.

Panic rose in me.

I couldn’t. I couldn’t stand here, not with my brother and what he didn’t know, and Race and what he shouldn’t know.

“I gotta walk,” I told them as I took off, shoving my hands into my pockets.

I wanted to slink down. I didn’t.

They were all watching me, so I kept my head up and my shoulders back.

A moment later, I heard a second pair of feet on the ground behind me. Expecting Cross, I didn’t say anything. He wouldn’t press me, knowing I would talk when I wanted. We could walk in silence. Sometimes that’s all I wanted.

But then it was Race who said quietly, “None of them know?”

I whirled to him, seeing red, and a second later, I had him backed against a tree, my knife at his throat.

I blinked a few times.

He was saying something…

I couldn’t—what was I doing? I wasn’t in control, but I didn’t retract my knife. It was right there. If I leaned forward into it, it would break his skin.

My eyes locked with his.

He stood still. Calm. Waiting.

I was frozen in place, but then my hand began to twitch.

“What are you talking about?” I demanded.

“Who touched you against your will?”

God.

I shook my head, pulling my knife away from his neck. “You don’t have the right to talk to me like that.”

His mouth opened. He was going to argue, then he closed it. He nodded. “You’re right. I don’t. I don’t know you.”

Finally.

An invisible weight lifted off me.

“I feel like I do, though.”

I shook my head, going over to a bench Jordan’s dad had built for his mom. It was set to look over the entire lot, with a walking trail leading into the woods behind us. It wasn’t the only path. They were all over. I took comfort in knowing I could slip away. I could take one path, then another, and another until I was gone.

“Drake spent the summer with my family, and he and I were inseparable,” Race said. “He talked about you. A lot. He told me about Jordan, about Zellman. Alex has always been my cousin, but I’ve not been that close to him. My dad doesn’t get along with Alex and Drake’s dad. There’s family fighting, so it was nice when Drake stayed with us. I’m an only kid. It was like I had a brother for a summer.”

He moved to lean against a tree about ten feet from me—close enough for a private conversation, far enough that I had my own space.

“He never said anything about Cross. Seeing how close you two are, I have to imagine there was a reason.”

What? I looked up at him. “What are you implying?”

He shrugged. “Nothing.”

I snorted. “You’d suck at poker.”

“Drake wouldn’t tell me why you guys broke up.”

Goddamn. I felt his accusation more than I heard it. He was a stranger. A stranger. He fought with us once. I should rile up. I should…do something, but I was tired. It felt like I had bursts of fight in me. I’d rail against whoever I needed to, whoever was trying to hurt me, push me around, use me, whatever. But then that burst of energy would leave me drained, and the age-old tiredness from life settled back into my bones.

I was starting to ache for some Cross time.

I returned my attention to Race. “If you’re accusing me of being a cheating whore, my knife is coming out.”

The heat was feigned in my voice. My fight was gone.

He laughed. “You’re not then?”

“Drake dumped me. Whatever he said, however he talked about me, I was not some love of his life. When he graduated, he wanted nothing to do with me or his group. He left all of us.”

“Yeah.” Race frowned. “He didn’t mention that.”

“Makes you wonder. He left out the heavy subjects, but rattled on about me, Zellman, and Jordan. He didn’t give two fucks about those two either. They were like ants to him.” I stood from the bench. “Do yourself a favor. Don’t read into anything he told you.”

“I’m starting to get that.”

Easy laughter traveled up to us, and I felt another kick in my chest. Channing was still standing with the guys. He could laugh with them, but he only yelled at me.

Maybe recently that had been my fault. I ignored him. I came and went as I pleased. I didn’t ask him for anything. I didn’t give him anything. We were like hostile strangers in the same house.

I was the aggravating little sister. He didn’t understand why I did anything. I wouldn’t open up when he asked. I didn’t eat dinner when he invited me. Even when he was angry, I would just leave. And if he tried to block me in the hallway, I’d go to my room and slip out through the window.

Every room in the house had an escape route.

Sadly, he had no clue, and maybe that was the problem.

Channing never did anything to me. He didn’t help me, but he didn’t hurt me. He just wasn’t there until two years ago, and even that was hit-and-miss most the time. And it wasn’t that I wished he had been.

I was jealous.

He’d gotten what I wanted—and I had to turn my thoughts off on that. That was for another night, one accompanied by hard liquor. Lots of liquor.

Race coughed once, tugging at his collar. “Look, I don’t know anything.”

Shit. I’d forgotten he was here.

“What?” I went still. Did he mean… I held my breath a moment.

“Before, at school.” He cringed. “I was bluffing. I knew you and Drake dated, and exes always know secrets. I was throwing something out there, just trying to push you guys off balance.” He held his hands up. “I swear. Drake never told me any secret about you.”

I was still wary of him. “Why’d you fight with us tonight?”

“Because my cousin was wrong.”

I eyed him.

“I’m not crew, obviously, but I’m not a pussy. And I’m not a bad guy.”

So he thought his cousin was. If he thought that after the first day, he was in for a rough ride this year. And the way he looked at me, it was always changing. Now I was a new puzzle. He was unlearning what he thought he knew, trying to find the place where the new pieces fit in.

I shook my head. “Do yourself a favor. Stop trying to figure me out.”

He let out a rueful laugh. “Maybe I should.” He glanced in the direction of the guys.

“Alex is going to kick you out of the house. And that’s if he decides you going against him was a family issue, not a crew thing.”

“And if he doesn’t? If he decides it’s a crew thing?”

“Then you’re fucked. His entire group will turn on you. You’ll become the number-one enemy at school.”

He barked out a laugh. “This whole system—it’s like nothing else matters. Your rules, your way, your lifestyle. That’s it.”

Exactly.

I offered an olive branch. “You need to decide where your loyalties lie. If you’re not joining a group, you better get to your cousin ASAP and kiss his ass until you got no lips. Alex can be a somewhat decent guy on a good day, but if he thinks someone’s looking down at him, he turns into a viper.”

“What about you guys? You taking on new members?”