“Not a lot, but why do girls always think you’re not into them if you don’t want to fuck? I mean, really, Maddie? I can barely keep my hands off of you. I just told you we can try dating and you want to know if I’m attracted to you?”

“Well, you just turned me down for sex.” She looked away. “That doesn’t really happen a lot.”

This time my jealousy kicked in. “Save it, please. I don’t need to hear about every guy you tried to give a blowjob to.”

“What?” She looked at me angrily. “That is not what I was saying.”

“Do you think I want to hear about how many guys were delighted that you were willing to have sex with them?”

“I didn’t say that.” She rolled away from me.

I pulled her towards me again. “I can’t believe we’re arguing about this.”

“Well, believe it, ass.”

“Fine.” I jumped up and pulled her up with me. “Let’s go.”

“What, where are we going?” She stood up reluctantly, and stared at me with a dazed expression.

“Do you want to know something about me?” I leaned towards her and whispered in her ear. She nodded slightly, and I continued. “I like ha**g s*x in public.”

“Okay, and …” She reached over to me and reached down my pants again. I shook my head and gave her a smirk.

“I like to have sex in public, where people are around.”

“You like them to watch you?” She looked at me with wide eyes and I laughed.

“No, I don’t go to sex clubs or anything. But I do like the thrill of knowing I’m ha**g s*x and that anyone could find out at any moment.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know why, maybe it’s the fear of getting caught. It gets my blood pumping.” I shrugged, worried I had scared Maddie off. It wasn’t every day that people shared the intimate details of their life, and I didn’t want her to think I was a freak. Not with everything else she knew about me.

“I suppose that makes sense.” She looked at me, considering. “I’ve never really had sex in public before; I mean aside from in the field with you, but no one was there.”

“We could change that …” I let my words trail off as I tried to hide my excitement.

“We could.” She turned away from me, and I saw a glimpse of a smile on her face.

“What are you thinking?”

“Let’s go shop.”

“Shop?” I tried to hide my disappointment. “You want to go shop?”

“Yeah. I’m in the mood for some new things.”

“You want to go now?”

“Don’t couples normally go shopping together?”

“Yes, I’m sure normal couples go shopping together.”

“We’re not normal?”

“Well, we’re not from Mars or anything, but I don’t think I’m the sort of person who can be in a normal anything.” I laughed. “Ask any of my exes.”

“I’d rather not ask them.” She frowned. “What did you do with your exes for fun?”

“For fun? Do you really want to know?”

“I guess not.” She started walking away from me and I hurried to keep up with her fast pace.

“You’re mad at me again.”

“I’m not mad.”

“You’ll have to be patient with me, Maddie. This isn’t something I do every day.”

“What’s not something you do every day? Have a conversation or try to not talk about your exes?”

I smiled to myself at her surly tone. Maddie was well and truly jealous. I knew it wasn’t funny, but her jealousy just didn’t seem to fit in with her confident attitude. It made me feel like I meant something to her.

“Let’s both of us not talk about our exes anymore.”

“Sounds like a plan to me.” She turned to me again with a small smile. “Now, can we go shopping?”

“I guess if you make me.”

“Make you?”

“Well, I’m not the biggest fan of shopping.”

“I think you’ll like this trip.”

“I doubt it.”

“We’ll see.” She grinned at me as we made our way to the car. “I mean we don’t have to go if you think they’ll be tracking the car.”

“We’ll park the car at the mall. I assume we’re going to the mall, right?”

“Am I that predictable?”

“You and all girls. Oops.” I laughed. “I forgot I’m not supposed to be talking about other women right now, am I?”

“No.” She rolled her eyes. “Though, I suppose as a guy, you can’t help it.”

“You know us guys.”

“All you think about it getting some.”

“Yup, you got it.” We got into the car and I saw Maddie grinning at me teasingly. “Sex, sex, and more sex.”

“Sex in the bedroom, sex in the bathroom, sex in the kitchen, sex in the field.” She counted off on her fingers. “That’s all that’s on your mind.”

“You know me so well.” I checked to see if there were any cop cars coming before I pulled back out onto the highway.

“I know men.” She winked at me and shimmied in the seat, and I put on a fake Spanish accent.

“Maddie, I think you are trying to turn me on with your sexy talk.”

“Are you trying to pretend you’re Italian?” She giggled.

“How dare you, I’m from Puerto Rico.” I rolled my R and tried to keep a straight face.

“Puerto Rico by way of Rome?”

“I’m from San Juan.” I winked at her. “And I’m going to show you how to salsa.”

“Ooh, really? I’d like you to show me how to salsa. Maybe I’ll get a dress at the mall.”

“Oh, God. Me and my big mouth. I’m going to become one of those men who stands there looking tortured while he waits for his woman to try on clothes.”

“I don’t know that you ever don’t look tortured.”

“Are you calling me dour?”

“Dour?” She made a face at me. “I’m not sure you can call a handsome young man dour. I’ve only ever thought of sour old women as dour.”

“Yay. I’m not a sour old woman.”

“Thank God.” She leaned over and whispered in my ear. “I wouldn’t want to have sex with a dour or sour old woman in a changing room.”

“What?” My eyes nearly popped out of my sockets at her words. “You what?”

“I figured that would get your heart racing.”

“You figured right! Why didn’t you tell me earlier? I would have taken you to any mall you wanted.”

“You’re such a guy.”

“I think we established that already.” I laughed and pressed the gas pedal excitedly. I turned on the radio and stopped at a song that Maddie seemed to know. She was singing along and bobbing her head and I laughed as she danced around in the seat. As I drove, I realized that I was happy. It was a weird feeling. A unique feeling for me, and I wasn’t used to how good it felt. The worries and the stress were gone, albeit briefly, and at the back of my mind. But in this instant, I felt like I was in Utopia. I’d never realized just how wonderful it could feel to be with someone I liked who liked me. It was a different but entirely pleasant feeling. Right now, I was just Logan, a regular boy, and I was amazed at how good that felt.

***

“Let’s go into Macy’s.” Maddie pulled my arm. “They have lots of changing rooms and they hardly ever have salesgirls around.”

“Macy’s?” I made a face. “That’s not exciting.”

“It’s in a store, it’s fine.”

“No, no. If we’re going to do this, it has to be somewhere exhilarating.”

“This is the mall, Logan. Not Hedonism Island in Jamaica.”

“Now, I wouldn’t mind going there.”

“Hell, no.” Maddie shook her head.

“I’m joking. I don’t have the money to take us there, even if I wanted to.” I made a face and turned away from her, angry at myself for bringing up money. For a moment, I had forgotten the dire straits I was currently in. I followed Maddie distractedly, as I started thinking about what I was going to do. Five hundred dollars wasn’t going to help the family much, and now that Marty was onto me not selling him the cars any longer, I knew I had to think of something else to do.

“Logan, earth to Logan.” Maddie looked at me in concern, and I could see her violet eyes searching my face. It was funny how she always seemed to know when my mood has changed. I knew that people said women were in tune with emotions and stuff, but I’d never had anyone close enough to pay attention to mine, not since my mom had died.

“Sorry, was just thinking.”

“Nope, I forbid it.” She grabbed her hands. “No worrying and no thinking right now.”

“You’re a bossy boots.”

“It comes from being an only child.”

“Must be nice.” I laughed, only half-joking. If I didn’t have Vincent and Jared to worry about, I could have left River Valley and started a new life for myself. I could have reinvented myself and perhaps made something of my life. But then you wouldn’t have met Maddie, a little voice whispered in my head. And you wouldn’t have your two best friends in your life, another voice whispered. And it was true; I’d take whatever adversity came my way to ensure that I had Vincent and Jared in my life. They were my life; they were everything to me. They were my blood and my sweat. They were the only people I knew I could trust my life with. Until I met Maddie.

“What are your brothers like?” Maddie interrupted my thoughts, and I smiled at her, wondering if she had ESP or something.

“Vincent’s the second oldest, he’s a fighter, and one of the best men I know. He is also pretty reserved, but he would do anything for the ones he loves. Jared, well, you know Jared a bit, he’s the baby of the family. Handsome, lovable, charming, quick-witted, and a big troublemaker.” I tried to laugh as I talked about Jared. Between Vincent and Jared, Jared was the one I was most worried about. He was smart and rebellious, more so than me and Vincent. And he had a propensity to act first and think later. I was worried he was going to get himself into trouble so deep that there would be no saving him. That was why I was pushing so hard for him to start college. I felt if he had some real goals and a real routine, he wouldn’t have time for Joey and the other troublemakers he hung around with.

“Yeah, Jared seems really cool.” Maddie smiled. “He’s very handsome and friendly.”

“Do you have a crush on him as well?” I played with the money in my pocket, waiting for her answer. All I could think about is how badly I would want to beat Jared if she said yes.

“Oh, no.” She laughed. “Not at all. You’ve always been the Martelli boy for me, though I’ve never met Vincent. And anyway, Lucy loves Jared.”

“Lucy?” I grinned up at her in relief. I hadn’t been looking forward to socking my own brother.

“Joey’s sister. My best friend.” She smiled. “Did you forget already?”

“Oh, no,” I lied. “Sure, Lucy.”

“You totally didn’t remember her.” She giggled and then ran her finger down my chest. “I’d like to meet him, too.”

“Meet who?” My brain was distracted as she ran her fingers to the top of my jeans and then paused.

“Your brother Vincent.” She leaned closer and looked up at me, batting her lashes cutely.

“What about your brother? I mean my brother. I mean Vincent.” I gazed down at her juicy pink lower lip and licked my lips. All I wanted to do was lean down and tug on it with my teeth.

“I’d like to meet him.” She moved even closer to me and I felt her breath against my mouth. “Can I?”

“Uh, sure,” I said without thinking and she rewarded me with a slow, sensual kiss. I pulled her towards me and put my hands in the back pockets of her jeans as we kissed. I pushed my tongue into her mouth and she ran her hands through my hair. It was only as I heard a couple of kids giggling beside us that I remembered where we were, and I pulled away from her regretfully.

“Oh, Logan.” She smiled up at me through eyes of lust and my stomach flipped as I thought about making love to her again. I grabbed her hand and we walked quickly through the mall, looking for a store that would fit the bill. “What about JC Penney?” She pointed to the store in the far corner, and I shook my head. “The Gap?”

“No, no.” I laughed and then I saw the pink stripes of Victoria’s Secret and my heart started racing. “Let’s go there.”

“Where?” Maddie followed my gaze and stopped still. “There’s no way we can go in Victoria’s Secret.” She shook her head. “They have girls by the changing rooms all the time and there is no way they will let you in with me.”

“Then we’ll have to sneak me in.”

“How can we sneak you in?” Her voice lowered as we entered the store and I was surrounded by panties and bras. I glanced around and grinned. Now this was a store to have sex in. I glanced at Maddie and pictured her modeling underwear for me: something lacy and see-through would be nice.

“Logan,” Maddie hissed at me. “Pay attention.”