For the first time, I realize the entire Order is here. I’ve grown used to eating with Jaxon and Mekhi a few times a week, obviously, but it’s rare for all of Jaxon’s friends to join us. Yet here they are—Luca, Byron, Rafael, Liam, all lined up behind Jaxon like they’re expecting an attack.

“Of course.” I gesture to the empty seats scattered around the table, but Luca isn’t asking me. His gaze is laser focused on Flint. Who, it turns out, is looking right back, a slight flush on his brown cheeks.

And wow, this is a development I did not see coming. But one I am absolutely here for.

A glance at Eden tells me she’s watching the whole thing as intently as I am, and the smile on her face makes me wonder if maybe I was wrong about who Flint has been in love with. I thought he meant Jaxon that day on the Ludares field, but maybe he meant Luca all along? Or maybe Luca was the new guy he was referring to? Since our talk, Flint hasn’t mentioned his love life again, and I didn’t feel it was fair to question him about it, either.

But whatever he was getting at that day, it’s obvious—right now at least—he is definitely interested in Luca. Who, apparently, is interested right back.

Flint nods, and Luca crosses over to sit next to him. Before I can even think about where Jaxon is going to sit, Macy has scooted her chair closer to Eden’s, creating an obviously empty space for someone to sit beside me. Jaxon nods his thanks, and seconds later, he’s pulled a chair from another table and is sliding in right next to me.

My heart jumps as his thigh grazes mine, and he grins just a little. Shoots me a look out of the corner of his eye I’d recognize anywhere. Then very slowly, very deliberately, does it again.

This time, my breath catches in my throat, because this is Jaxon. My Jaxon. And though our relationship hasn’t felt the same since the challenge, and though I’m so confused I can barely think, I still want him. I still love him.

“How was your day?” he asks softly.

I shake my head as the state of my grades, and the precariousness of my graduating, comes back to me. “So bad that I don’t want to talk about it.”

I don’t mention that him not answering my texts only made the day worse. I can tell from the look in his eyes that he already knows it. And that he doesn’t like this mess any more than I do.

“How—” My voice breaks, so I clear my throat and try again. “How about you? How was your day?”

He makes a face, shoves his hand through his silky black hair hard enough to reveal the jagged scar on his left cheek. The scar the vampire queen Delilah—his mother—gave him for murdering her firstborn son. Who is now back. And is now my mate, even though I am still in love with my old mate whose bond with me should never have been able to be broken.

Just thinking about it makes my head hurt.

Talk about a soap opera. I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried.

“Pretty much the same,” he finally answers.

“Yeah, I figured.”

He doesn’t offer anything else, and neither do I. Around us, the conversation ebbs and flows, but I can’t think of a single thing to say to break his stony silence. It feels strange to be this awkward with Jaxon, when we used to talk for hours about anything. About everything.

I hate it so much, especially watching how easy everyone else is with one another. Eden and Mekhi are laughing together, and so are Macy and Rafael. Byron and Liam are talking intensely about something, and Flint and Luca… Well, Flint and Luca are definitely flirting, while Jaxon and I can barely look at each other.

I start to take another bite of my frozen yogurt but realize I’ve lost my appetite before I so much as get the spoon to my mouth. I drop it back in the bowl and decide: fuck it. If things are so weird that I can’t eat, I might as well go to the library.

Jaxon must sense my unease, though, because just as I’m about to get up, he slides his hand over mine. It feels so familiar, so good, that I automatically turn mine over to lace our fingers together even though I’m still annoyed with him.

He kisses my fingers before placing our joined hands onto his leg under the table, and a shiver of awareness runs through me. It’s moments like these, when we’re touching, that I think maybe we still have a chance. Maybe everything isn’t as screwed up as it seems. Maybe there really is hope.

I’m pretty sure he feels the same way, judging by the grip he has on my hand. And the fact that he doesn’t say anything to break the comfortable silence between us, almost as if he’s as afraid as I am to ruin this moment. So we just sit there, soaking in the conversations going on around us. It works, too, at least for a little while.

And then it happens—every nerve in my body goes on red alert.

I don’t need to turn around to know Hudson has just walked into the cafeteria, but the way Jaxon’s hand tightens on mine gives me all the added confirmation I need.

6

A Tale of

Two Vegas

A second later, it’s like everyone notices him at once. Each person at the table stills as if holding their collective breath even as their eyes dart everywhere—except toward Jaxon and me. Well, everyone except Macy, who’s waving like she’s trying to flag down a bush plane in a snowstorm. And that’s before she slides her chair down to make room for him to join us, moving so far that she’s practically in Eden’s lap.

Hudson murmurs a quick “thanks” even as he grabs a chair and plops his tray down next to Macy. There are four slices of cheesecake on it, along with his usual tumbler of blood.

Macy grins even wider, grabbing one of the plates. “Awww, you shouldn’t have.”

“I heard it was Wingo night. Thought you might appreciate some of the leftovers,” Hudson says to Macy, but his eyes never leave mine, except for the one brief moment where he tracks the fact that both Jaxon and I have a hand under the table. And even though I know he can’t see us touching, I feel like I’ve been caught doing something wrong. Jaxon must sense my sudden discomfort because he pulls his hand from mine and folds both of his on top of the table.

Hudson doesn’t say anything to either of us. Instead, he turns to my cousin like he didn’t even notice us holding hands and asks, “Anyone up for chess later?”

The two of them have been playing chess a couple of times a week. I think Hudson asked her to play with him the first time to take her mind off Xavier, and she accepted because she felt bad that everyone gave him such a wide berth. But lately, I’ve caught her googling chess moves when she thinks I’m not looking, and I know she’s started to really enjoy their friendship.

“You better believe it,” she replies around a mouthful of cheesecake. “One of these days, I’m going to kick your ass.”

“Pretty sure you’re going to have to remember how to move your knight first,” he shoots back.

“Hey, it’s complicated,” she tells him.

“Waaaaay harder than checkers,” Eden teases her even as she steals a bite of Macy’s cheesecake.

“It is!” Macy pouts. “Every piece does something different.”

“I’ll play with you, Macy,” Mekhi calls from his spot at the end of the table. “Hudson’s not the only master strategist at the table.”

“No, but I am the only one with my own chess table,” Hudson tells him.

Eden snorts. “Not sure that’s something to brag about, Destructo Boy.”

“You’re just jealous, Lightning Girl.”

“Damn straight.” She grins. “I want to be able to blow shit up with just a wave of my hand.”

He lifts a brow. “You mean you can’t?”

She just laughs and rolls her eyes.

“Hey, Hudson, hit me up, man,” Flint calls from the other end of the table.

Hudson glances at Macy, who shrugs, before he slides a piece of cheesecake down the table to Flint.

Flint nods his thanks before shoving a huge bite in his mouth. Luca smiles fondly at him before gesturing to the book Hudson put down next to his tray. “What are you reading now?” he asks.

Hudson holds up the book. “A Lesson Before Dying.”

“A little late for that, isn’t it?” Flint asks, and after a shocked pause, everyone cracks up. Especially Hudson.

I want to say something to him—I read that book junior year and loved it—but it feels weird to join in a conversation I’m obviously not included in. Hudson has talked to everyone at the table—everyone—except Jaxon and me. Which isn’t awkward at all.

Especially not when the conversation continues to go on around us. Every time Flint says something funny, Hudson’s eyes meet mine like he wants to share the joke…then they dart away like he thinks we aren’t supposed to do that anymore. I hate it, just like I hate the weirdness that keeps growing between us. Hudson has done nothing to make me feel guilty for being in love with his brother—in fact, just the opposite. But us being mates (and that Jaxon and I used to be) hangs in the air between us like a bomb about to go off.

Add in the way Rafael and Liam keep staring him down because they can’t seem to let go of the past and the way Flint blows hot and cold depending on his mood, and I can’t help thinking Hudson would rather be anywhere but here. But he comes back, every day. He keeps trying, every day, because he wants things not to be awkward between us.