This one . . . looked like it might like to see me put a chip on my shoulder.
I extended my senses cautiously and suddenly felt the nearly silent thrum of the malk's aura. Whoa. The thing had power. Like, lots of power. You couldn't usually feel a wizard's aura unless you were close enough to touch it, but I could feel his from across the room. Whatever that thing was, it only looked like one of the other furry, terminally ADD homicidal maniacs. I reeled in on the attitude.
"Who are you?"
The malk bowed his head once. "A faithful servant of the Queen of Air and Darkness. I am most often called Sith."
"Heh," I said. "Where's your red lightsaber?"
Sith's golden eyes narrowed. "When first your kind began scrawling knowledge upon stone and clay, my name was ancient. Walk carefully around it."
"Just trying to brighten the conversation with humor, Sithy. You need to cheer up."
Sith's tail twitched again. "Slicing your spine into coasters would cheer me. May I?"
"Gotta go with 'no' on that one," I said. Then I blinked. "Wait. You're . . . Cat Sith. The Cat Sith?"
The malk inclined its head again. "I am he."
Hell's bells. Cat Sith was a major figure in faerie folklore. This thing wasn't just a malk. It was the freaking monarch of the malks, their progenitor, their Optimus Prime. I'd taken on an ancient faerie creature like this one a few years back. It hadn't been pretty.
When Cat Sith had offered to slice my spine into coasters, he wasn't kidding. If he was anything like the ancient phobophage, he could do it.
"I see," I said. "Um. What are you doing here?"
"I am your batman."
"My . . ."
"Not the notional hero," Sith said, a bit of a growl in his voice. "Your batman. Your orderly."
"Orderly . . ." I frowned. "Wait. You work for me?"
"I prefer to think of it as managing your incompetence," Sith replied. "I will answer your questions. I will be your guide while you are here. I will see to it that your needs are met."
I folded my arms. "And you work for me?"
Sith's tail twitched again. "I serve my Queen."
Aha. Evasion. There was something he was avoiding. "You are to answer my questions, are you not?"
"Did Mab order you to obey my commands?"
Twitch, twitch, twitch went the tail. Sith stared at me and said nothing.
Silence could generally be taken as assent, but I just couldn't resist. "Get me a Coke."
Sith stared at me. Then he vanished.
I blinked and looked around, but he was gone. Then, maybe a second and a half later, there was the snap-hiss of a beverage can being opened. I turned and found Cat Sith sitting on one of the room's dressers. An opened can of Coke sat beside him.
"Whoa," I said. "How did . . . You don't even have thumbs."
Sith stared at me.
I crossed to the dresser and picked up the can. Sith's eyes tracked me the whole time, his expression enigmatic and definitely not friendly. I sipped at the drink and grimaced. "Warm?"
"You did not tell me otherwise," he said. "I shall be happy to similarly fulfill any such command you give me, Sir Knight, but for those that contravene the orders of my Queen."
Translation: I don't want to be here. I don't like you. Give me commands and I will give you hell for it. I nodded at the malk. "I hear you." I sipped at the Coke. Warm or not, it was still Coke. "So why the tux? What's the occasion?"
"Tonight is a celebration of birth."
"Birthday party, huh?" I said. "Whose?"
Sith said absolutely nothing for several seconds. Then he rose and leapt down to the floor, landing without a sound. He flowed past me to the door. "You cannot possibly be that stupid. Follow me."
My hair was still pretty messy. I slopped some water on it and combed it back, which was as close to neat as it was going to get, and then walked after Sith, my patent leather formal shoes gleaming and clicking on the stone floor.
"Who's going to be at this party?" I asked Sith when I caught up to him. I hadn't left my chambers in a while. My entire life had been eating, sleeping, and getting myself put back together. Besides, I hadn't wanted to go sightseeing around Arctis Tor. The last time I'd been there, I'd pissed off the faeries. Like, all of them. I hadn't fancied the idea of bumping into some hostile bogeyman looking for payback in a dark corridor. The door leading from my chambers opened by itself, and Sith walked through it with me behind him.
"The high and mighty among the Winter Sidhe," Sith said. "Important figures from the Wyld. There may even be a delegation from Summer there."
As we emerged into the capital of Winter, the corridors changed from what looked more or less like smooth, poured concrete to crystalline ice in every hue of glacial blue and green, the bands of color merging, intertwining. Flickers of light danced through the depths of the ice like lazy fireflies of violet and crimson and cold sky blue. My eyes wanted to follow the lights, but I didn't let them. I couldn't tell you why, but my instincts told me that would be dangerous, and I listened to them.
"Kind of a big event, huh?" I said. "Think there'll be a problem with the paparazzi?"
"One may hope," Sith said. "Dispatching the perpetrators of such an intrusion would be gratifying."
The air was arctic cold. I could feel the biting depth of the chill, but its fangs couldn't seem to break my skin. It wasn't exactly comfortable, but it didn't matter. I didn't shiver. I didn't shake. I chalked it up to the power Mab had given me.
Sith led me down a much dimmer corridor, and we passed in and out of patches of deep darkness and cold, sullen light. As we did, our shadows danced and stretched. After a few seconds, I noticed that Cat Sith's shadow was larger than mine. Like, seven or eight times larger than mine. I gulped.
"The last time I was at a supernatural shindig, I got poisoned and then everything there tried to kill me. So I burned the whole place to the ground," I said.
"An appropriate way to deal with one's enemies," Sith said. "Perhaps you will find Arctis Tor less flammable."
"I've never met a place I couldn't blow up, burn down, or knock over with enough motivation," I said. "Think anyone at the party wants to kill me?"
"Yes. I want to kill you."
"Because I annoy you?"
"Because I enjoy it." Sith glanced up at me for a moment. His billboard-size shadow on the wall mirrored the motion. "And you also annoy me."