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Page 48
Page 48
“Hey.”
Everything in me sagged in relief. His voice soothed me. In the distance, I was barely aware of a door clicking shut. I murmured back, “Hey.”
He chuckled. His smooth baritone came over the phone and sidled over me, like another caress from him. I closed my eyes and snuggled deeper into bed. I didn’t care how I got there, what had happened, all I needed was Carter. That was all I knew.
“They said you fainted. Are you okay?”
I grimaced as I remembered. “Yeah. I did.”
“Why?”
“Because you weren’t here. Because I think something happened to Mallory and Ben. Amanda told me they’re gone and I think you know something happened to them. Because I’m tired of feeling trapped. Because I got booted off a great project at work and I don’t know why. Because I miss Amanda. I miss all of them, even Ben.” I felt stupid saying all of that and I felt even more stupid because it was coming out of me in a rush. I needed him. My hand shook as it held the phone to my ear. “Because I miss you and because I’m scared.”
There was silence on the other end.
Another beat passed.
“I’m coming back.”
Everything in me exploded, but I tried to argue with him. “No, I didn’t mean for you to do that—”
“I’m coming home anyway.” He sounded tired. “I have some business in New York, but I’ll head to the jet right after.” He paused. “I miss you too.”
Warmth burst inside of me, but I tried to tone it down. I was becoming one of those gushy types. I hated those types, but I whispered back, “I’m glad you’re coming back.”
“You have to promise me something first.”
“What?”
“Stop taking your anger out on the guys and making sudden changes.”
Guilt sunk low in my gut.
“You can go wherever you want, just tell the guys first. They’re good at their jobs, but sometimes they can’t adapt fast enough. Please, Emma.”
“I will.”
“Good. How was your week?”
“It sucked.”
He chuckled again. “I’m guessing it’s not just because of last week?”
“What?”
“Friday night, Emma.”
“Oh!” My eyes widened. I’d forgotten about the attack. How could I have forgotten? “That slipped my mind. I can’t believe that…”
“Look,” his voice dropped to an intimate tone. “I can’t talk about a lot of things over the phone, but I’m making things happen. I’m making sure you’re safe and someday you might not need all those guys around you. I’m trying, Emma. I’m doing my damnedest right now to fix it so you’re going to be okay.”
“But my roommate,” I whispered back.
He sighed into the phone. “I can’t make any promises about her. I’m trying, but you’re my first priority, Emma. I promise you, this will all be over soon.”
I clenched the phone tighter. “You promise?”
“I do. I can promise that.”
I nodded and felt a tear fall onto the pillow. “Okay.”
“Are you okay?” Concern filtered into his voice now. “Are you eating?”
“I got scared.” The admission slipped me before I knew what I was going to say.
“I’m sorry, Emma. I should’ve been there.”
“No, you said that you have things to do. You have to work. You—” are doing something to make sure that I’m safe. Even as I thought that, shame tore through me. He was right. I was angry that he left and that he stayed away for so long. I was angry that he hadn’t called or texted. I was angry that he wasn’t beside me, but Carter wasn’t normal. This wasn’t a normal relationship—and then I bolted upright in bed.
Carter and I were in a relationship.
The last time I’d been in a relationship—I squeezed my eyes shut. The guy had cheated on me, robbed me, and turned all of my friends against me. It was another reason why I was only friends with Mallory and Amanda. The few friends I had in college were snooty and disloyal. Mallory and Amanda seemed safe when I met each of them.
AJ and Carter had been my first family. The few friends I had in college could never be considered as family, but that changed once I met Mallory after I graduated. She became my family, and then Amanda was included. Ben got added because he never left Mallory’s side for years. But now those three were gone and Carter had come back.
As I sat there, struggling to breathe, tears flowed down my face. Everyone left.
“Emma?”
I became aware of his voice. The phone had fallen into the covers and I grabbed it. “Sorry.”
“Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.”
“Emma.”
“I am,” I rushed out. “When are you coming back?”
“I’ll be back tomorrow night.”
“Good.” I took a deep breath. “That’s good.”
“Are you sure you’re okay?”
“I’m good.” And I was, as long as I heard his voice, felt his voice, had him in my life—I was good, but it wasn’t going to last. Nothing good lasted for me. He was going to go away. I just didn’t know when or how it would happen.
“Okay…” He wasn’t convinced.
I counted to ten, hoping he’d let it go. I couldn’t spill any of the thoughts that were racing in my mind. They were too much.