I was a pro when it came to bikes now. Having ridden behind Remy the last – Fuck, stop thinking about him!

I took my seat behind him and wrapped my arms around his waist. I felt his muscles tense at my contact. I didn’t like his uncertainty. I may as well have been hugging a log.

“Hold on tight,” he said. “As I ride, move along with my body. With every turn, lean with me.”

He didn’t have to tell me all this. I already knew. “Okay,” I said anyway.

He started the bike and off we went, to the unknown place he called far, far away.

Nineteen

We’d been on the road for hours. He stopped at one point at a gas station to fill up. That was the one and only pit stop.

At first I thought he was just riding for the sake of getting as far away from Gosnells as possible. But I thought this was very unlike Jaxon. Just as he masterfully put together the plan for my escape, I’m sure he had an escape destination in mind.

I was right.

About ten minutes outside of Maddington, a popular tourist town three and half hours from Gosnells, he turned off the road and onto a dirt path into the bush. At this point I was exhausted, my ass was numb, and my legs felt like deadweight. I just wanted off the damn bike, even if it meant sleeping on the ground for the rest of the night.

When he finally stopped the bike, I hurriedly threw my helmet off and took in the log cabin he parked us in front of. In the darkness I couldn’t make out much except that it looked to be a decent size with a wraparound wooden porch.

He climbed up a set of steps and withdrew a key from his pocket. I followed him up and by then the door was opened. Two steps in and the lights went on. He was standing beside the light switch, glancing back at me for half a second before disappearing down the hallway and into another room, leaving me standing in the middle of a decent sized living room.

I shut the door behind me and observed my surroundings. It was very well set up: white couches, pine wood coffee table with a mountain of magazines on top, a shaggy cream coloured rug, log walls, rustic fireplace and decorative nature pictures hung from every wall… It seemed like a neutral, impersonal space that didn’t belong to an owner, but a place reserved for guests.

I walked down the hallway and turned to the room Jaxon had gone in. It was a small kitchen and, judging by the stainless steel appliances and marble countertops, was surprisingly modern. I hated that my previous perception of cabins were of insipid, old school, run down looking shanties. This certainly was not the case at all.

He was at the fridge unloading a carton of orange juice and cold meats on a plate. He set them on the counter before turning to me.

“Thought I’d have some food for us. You must be hungry.” The flat, disinterested line rubbed me the wrong way. Why couldn’t he be a little happier? Look at what we just did, for crying out loud!

I shook my head. “I’m not hungry. Just want to sleep.”

I followed his eyes at a round clock on the wall. It was one in the morning, holy hell.

“I’ll show you to your room then,” he said, walking out of the kitchen.

Your room. I pursed my lips and scrunched my eyebrows in distaste. Your room? I followed him down the hall and to the only bedroom in the cabin. The only one, dammit, which meant this was our room!

He turned the light on and pointed at the door in the corner. “There’s the bathroom. There are some clothes in the dresser I asked… a friend to put in for you.” The way he said friend didn’t escape me at all. I darted his back some evil eyes. This shit stunk.

“Where will you be sleeping?” I asked pointedly.

“I’m taking the couch,” he answered, without batting me an eye as he turned back around and walked out. Then he added, “If you need anything, let me know.”

I stood in the middle of the room, barely caring for the beautiful four poster bed, even though it screamed for me to lay my sweet ass down for some relaxation. I heard him placing the plates back into the fridge and then slamming the door shut before his footsteps faded into the living room. I stood in the silence for a while, and I hated it. Back to being alone when my other half was on the couch, deliberately keeping me at a distance. Why?

I eventually threw off my shoes and ambled to the dresser, eyeing my reflection with a shudder.

“The look of a traitor,” I whispered at myself. “That’s what you are.”

Hmm. Not what I expected a traitor to look like: baggy eyes, messy hair, pouty sad lips, pale face… I expected something a little more sinister.

Still, I detested what I saw. Would time make it better? Would I be able to look at my reflection and see something kindred staring back at me? Or would I forever feel like a treacherous snake?

I opened the drawers of the dresser and shuffled through an assortment of clothes. There wasn’t a lot, and many of it consisted of baggy shirts with faded logos on the front. It was a half-assed choice of clothes from his friend, but anything was better than what I had on now.

I found a plain white night gown and set it aside. I then took off his leather jacket and set it neatly on the dresser. I stripped my clothes off, squinting at my reflection. It’d been a while since I’d seen my naked ass in front of a big mirror. I twisted my body around, noticing that my curves had grown smaller. I’d lost weight the last few months, at least a size judging by how comfortable some of those weird gypsy clothes from Remy had gotten. Even my bra looked spacious.

I put the night gown on and then walked into the large ensuite bathroom. This cabin was beautiful. Even the bathroom was modern with a beautiful stone basin, large round tub and a shower stall that looked heavenly clean and fresh. I washed my hands and face, scrutinized myself some more and stepped back into the bedroom.

Loneliness gripped at me. And dread. I thought of Remy returning to the clubhouse to find what I’d done. I wondered how heartbroken he was feeling right that very second. I breathed unsteadily, remembering the way he held me the last time. I’d hugged him so hard knowing it would be the last hug I’d ever give him.

My knees weakened at my sadness, and I wiped furiously away at my tears. I reminded myself I had made the right choice. Even if that choice had barely said a word to me and was sleeping on the couch. Maybe I was being too harsh on him. Maybe he was just tired.

It took everything in me not to go and seek him out. I kept thinking maybe he really needed some alone time. If he truly wanted to be with me right now, he’d have come in already.