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Page 50
Page 50
“Highew!” She giggled.
“That’s good,” Trenton called. “She says higher, but then she gets scared.”
“Do not!” Olive said.
I pushed her, careful to push her enough only to keep her happy. I looked past her to Taylor, who was watching us like a proud father.
Olive let me push her for another ten minutes, and then she asked me to swing with her, so I climbed into the swing next to her. Once I got myself going, she reached out for my hand. We swung back and forth together, giggling at nothing and everything.
She threw back her head, the most wonderful laugh flitting through the air. The whole world fell away, and in that moment, it was just her and me, making the memory I’d dreamed of since she was born.
“Slide!” Olive jumped off the swing to the ground, her little feet already in motion.
Together, we climbed up the ladder, and then I followed her across the bridge to the double slide. We sat side by side, and I looked over at my daughter, her face almost identical to so many of my childhood photographs. Olive pushed off, and I did, too. Our feet hit the ground at the same time. Our eyes met, and we raced around again.
As the hour passed, I chased Olive around the playground, and a peace came over me that I had never felt before. She was happy, and even though I had missed it all, we had that perfect little moment of time, one of just her and me that would hide away in her memory.
All too soon though, Trenton called for her, “Ew! Your mom’s home from the store! Time to go.”
“Aw!” she groaned. She looked up at me. “Want to come to my house and pway?”
“I wish I could,” I said. “I loved spending time with you.”
She opened her arms wide, waiting for me. I bent down and gently held her, feeling the strands of her hair in my face and her pudgy little fingers pressing into my shoulders.
“Nice to meet you,” Olive said, waving good-bye.
Trenton swept her up into his arms and carried her to the car.
“Bye, wady!”
I tried not to cry as Trenton buckled her in, saving my tears until he pulled away.
“That was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen,” Taylor said. “Was it what you wanted?”
All I could do was nod, and then I sat down on the bench, holding myself upright by gripping the edge of my seat.
Taylor sat next to me. He looked upon me with more love and understanding than I’d ever felt. All the while, I let the peace of closure set in. I took a breath and let six years of pain, anger, and shame leave my body as I exhaled.
“Falyn?” he said, his voice thick with worry.
A single tear trickled down my cheek as I looked over at him with a small smile. “She’s happy,” I said simply. “And I’m happy. I’m not sure what I expected, but this is so much more. I’ll never be able to thank you enough.”
He brought my hand to his lips. “The look on your face right now? That’s all I need.”
I threw my arms around him, and he tightly squeezed me.
“Will you tell him?” I asked.
“Trent? No. Today was for you and Olive to make a memory, and then let the rest go.”
I released him and then leaned against his shoulder. “I like that.”
“I plan to do a lot of things that you’ll like. But first, I’m going to sit here with you for as long as you need. Don’t feel rushed.”
I sighed and hugged his arm, memorizing the playground and the small wooded area about fifty yards behind it. The birds were singing as a slight breeze blew the fallen leaves around on the ground.
“It’s perfect,” I said.
“Ten minutes ago, watching you and her … I wish I could have frozen that moment, so we could live in it forever.”
“We can. We can live here in Olive’s memory. Maybe every time she visits this park, she’ll remember our time together.”
“I bet she will.”
I let my temple relax against his shoulder. “I don’t feel rushed. My heart doesn’t have room for anything else but you, her, and happiness.”
Chapter Seventeen
Taylor jumped out of bed just before the sun came up, fumbling around my bedroom and cursing in the dark while trying to find his clothes. Rolling onto my side, I leaned up on my elbow, propping my head with my hand, as I tried to suppress a laugh.
“It’s not funny, baby,” he said, hopping as he pulled on his jeans. “I’m going to hit Denver traffic if I don’t leave in two minutes, and that will make me late for work!”
“Maybe you shouldn’t surprise me the night before your shift then?”
He leaped into the bed, and I squealed.
He planted a peck on my lips. “Don’t even pretend you weren’t fucking ecstatic.”
“I was.” I leaned up to kiss him again. “Thanks again for dinner … and the movie … and everything after that.”
With hesitation and regret, he pushed off the bed and away from me to finish getting dressed. He pulled on his boots and then grabbed his phone and his keys. “Call me when you wake up.”
“I’m kind of awake.”
His frown was barely highlighted from the streetlight outside my bedroom window. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. Go,” I said, glancing outside. “It’s snowing. Be careful.”
He made a face. “I will kick that snow’s ass.” He bent down to kiss me once more, but it ended up being three more. He shook his head. “Fuck! I’m gonna miss you. I’m sick of missing you.”
“Go to work,” I said, touching his cheek.
“I’m going. Call me later!” He hurried out the door, his heavy boots knocking against every step on his way down.
I lay on my back, blowing out a frustrated sigh. I was sick of missing him, too, but we had just returned from Christmas in Eakins and celebrated the New Year and Taylor’s and Tyler’s birthdays together at their fire station in Estes Park. It was only seven weeks before Travis and Abby’s vow renewal in St. Thomas, and then Taylor would be back in Colorado Springs. I hoped. It wasn’t that I wished for wildfires, but that was the only thing that would bring Taylor to town.
I relaxed in bed and played on my phone for half an hour and then decided to take a shower, dress for work, and head downstairs. Pete was pulling out ingredients for prep, and I sat on the far counter, watching him work.