Balthazar didn’t seem to mind, but he thought his answer over for a long time. “Those memories—of being alive—they’re the best memories I have. And the worst memories I have. Living through that again brings a lot back.”

“What did you remember?”

A small smile crossed his face. “My first kiss.”

“Really?” That didn’t sound so sad, Skye thought, until she realized how long ago it might’ve been. “When was that?”

“1640.”

Skye tried very hard not to let her shock show; she’d guessed he was old, but somehow hearing him say it jolted her regardless. She said only, “Where?”

“Massachusetts Bay Colony. Just outside Boston.”

It was such a simple answer, and yet she knew from the way he said it that Balthazar told very few people about his past. She wanted to hear more, but didn’t want to push—to abuse the trust he was showing her. So she said only, “What happened?”

Balthazar shook his head. “One thing you can always be sure of—any vampire’s life story has an unhappy ending.”

Instinctively, Skye leaned her head against his shoulder—offering comfort and seeking it, all at once. Even as she did so, she thought, This is too much. I shouldn’t hang on him. Probably he isn’t feeling what I’m feeling right now.

But before she could pull away, Balthazar’s arm tightened around her, and his head rested against hers. Skye closed her eyes. She didn’t know why she felt less lost now that she knew he was lost, too. Yet she did.

Balthazar walked her inside, all the way to her bedroom. As she wearily set down her pack, he went to the window and stared out into the darkness. “I don’t think they’re around tonight. Bianca’s wraith show did the trick.”

“That’s something, anyway.” She walked toward him, rubbing her sore neck. “Maybe I’ll actually get some sleep tonight. But I doubt it.”

“I could stay, if you wanted.” Balthazar looked back at her, his fighter’s frame outlined by the darkness.

“Stay tonight? In my room?”

“Yeah—oh. Or downstairs. Around. So you’d feel safer.”

“I don’t know.”

Skye wanted him to stay as badly as she’d ever wanted anything. But right now it felt like she might do reckless things, without thinking, only to escape the fear beating within her like a second pulse.

“Are you okay?” Balthazar said. Only then did she realize she’d begun trembling again. She didn’t know if that was from fright, tension, exhaustion, desire—all of them together—just that there was only so much she could take in a couple of days, and she’d taken it.

She reached out blindly with one hand, and Balthazar’s arms went around her, enveloping her in his embrace. Skye didn’t cry, didn’t speak. Instead she gripped the lapels of his coat as she buried her face in the curve of his neck. He held her tightly as she breathed in and out, steady and slow, calming herself.

“We’re going to get through this.” He spoke as if they were truly in it together, as if she weren’t the hunted and he the protector. “I’m not going to let them hurt you. Not ever.”

Skye couldn’t say anything. She pulled back to look at Balthazar, at the strong lines of his face so close to hers. The moonlight off the snow had painted him silver. Without hesitating, without thinking, she tilted her face up and kissed him.

It was the softest touch, only for an instant. Balthazar didn’t move. The reality of what she’d done rushed over Skye, and she might have stepped away or even apologized—if Balthazar hadn’t kissed her back.

This time she wound her arms around his neck, closed her eyes, and let the world fall away. His mouth was hard against hers, the kiss fierce enough to electrify. It was only a few seconds, but it felt like she’d escaped all the danger and fear forever.

When they broke apart, though, Balthazar took her arms from around his neck, shaking his head. “I shouldn’t have done that. I’m sorry.”

“Why not?” Skye gave him a look. “Because you don’t like me that way?”

“What? No. That isn’t—no.” One of his hands stroked through her hair, a brief, simple caress. “It’s just… I made a rule centuries ago, Skye. No getting involved with humans. It’s dangerous for them, more than you can possibly realize.”

“I’m already in danger,” she pointed out, but she stepped away from him anyway. Although logically she thought she ought to have felt rejected, she didn’t. Balthazar’s eyes never left her face; his body remained taut from the tension of their brief kiss. And that kiss—

No, he wasn’t rejecting her. He wanted her. He just wouldn’t let himself have her.

Skye said, “You should go, I think.”

“Yeah.” Balthazar had obviously been expecting her to ask him to stay, or to try to kiss him again. Had he been hoping for that? Hoping she’d give him an excuse to give in? “I’ll keep watch outside for a while, though. Make sure you’re safe. So you can sleep.”

She smiled at him crookedly. “Thanks.”

Balthazar hesitated, clearly wanting to say something else. For a long moment they stared into each other’s eyes, yearning to keep the connection. Then he was gone—not like a normal person, but vampire fast, as if he had flickered into shadow instead of walking out. She gasped, both from shock and from the pain of that sudden parting.