Page 44

"Nothing makes her loss easier. Right now I am still searching for the thread to our Goddess." Rephaim felt a horribly sick jolt within him as he realized he had caused the pain the Sword Master was feeling. He had killed the spells and rituals professor, Anastasia Lankford. She had been Dragon's mate. He had done it so coldly, with an absolute lack of any feeling except, perhaps, annoyance at being detained for the short time it had taken him to overpower and destroy her.

I killed her with no thought for anything or anyone except my need to follow Father, to do his bidding. I am a monster.

Rephaim couldn't stop looking at the Sword Master. He carried his pain like a cloak around him. He could almost literally see the empty hole his mate's absence had left in his life. And Rephaim, for the first time in his centuries- long life, felt remorse for his actions.

He didn't think he'd made any sound, any movement, but he knew when Stevie Rae's gaze found him. Slowly, he looked from Dragon to the vampyre with whom he was Imprinted. Their eyes met; their gazes locked. Her emotions engulfed him as if she'd purposely directed them to him. First, he felt her shock at seeing him. It left him flushed and almost embarrassed. Then he felt sadness--deep, jagged, painful. He tried to telegraph his own sorrow to her, hoping that somehow she would be able to understand how much he missed her and how sorry he was for having any part in the grief she was experiencing. Anger hit him then with such a force Rephaim almost lost his grip on the stone wall. He shook his head back and forth, back and forth, not sure whether it was in denial of her anger, or the reason for it. "I want you and Duchess to come with me, Damien. Y'all need to get away from this place. Bad things have happened here. Bad things are still lurkin' 'round here. I can feel it. Let's go. Now." She spoke to the kneeling boy, but her gaze never left Rephaim's.

The Sword Master's response was swift. His eyes swept the area and Rephaim froze, willing the shadows and the night to cloak him.

"What is it? What's here?" Dragon asked.

"Darkness." Stevie Rae was still staring at him when she spoke that single word as if throwing a dagger into his heart. "Tainted, unredeemable Darkness." Then she turned her back on him dismissively. "My gut says it's not anything worth raisin' your sword against, but let's get outta here just the same."

"Agreed," Dragon said, though Rephaim heard reluctance in his voice.

He will be a force to be reckoned with in the future, Rephaim acknowledged to himself. And what about Stevie Rae? His Stevie Rae. What will she be? Could she really hate me? Could she utterly reject me? He sifted through her feelings as he watched her take Damien's hand and help him to his feet, and then lead him, the dog, cat, and Dragon away toward the dormitories. He certainly felt her anger and her sorrow, and he understood those feelings. But hatred? Did she really hate him? He didn't know for sure, but Rephaim believed, deep in his heart, that he deserved her hatred. No, he hadn't killed Jack, but he was allied with the forces that had.

I am my father's son. It's all I know how to be. It is my only choice.

After Stevie Rae was gone Rephaim pulled himself up to the top of the wall. He took a running start and leaped into the sky. Beating against the night with his massive wings, he circled around the watchful campus and headed back to the roof of the Mayo building.

I deserve her hatred ... I deserve her hatred ... I deserve her hatred ...

The litany pounded through his mind in time with his wing strokes. His own despair and grief joined with the echo of Stevie Rae's sadness and anger. The dampness of the cool night sky mixed with his tears as Rephaim's face was bathed in moonlight and loss.

Chapter Thirteen

Stevie Rae

"Oh, for shit's sake! Are you telling me no one has called Zoey?" Aphrodite said.

Stevie Rae took Aphrodite by the elbow and, with a grip that was maybe firmer than technically necessary, guided her to the door in Damien's dorm room. At the doorway she paused and both girls looked back at the bed, where Damien was curled up with Duchess and his cat, Cameron. Boy, dog, and cat had finally, just minutes before, fallen into a sleep induced by grief and exhaustion.

Silently, Stevie Rae pointed her finger from Aphrodite to the hallway. Aphrodite sneered. Stevie Rae crossed her arms and planted herself.

"Outside," she mouthed, "now." Then she followed her out of the room and closed the door softly behind them. "And keep your dang voice down out here, too," Stevie Rae whispered fiercely.

"Fine. I'll keep it down. Jack is dead and no one has called Z?" she repeated her question, much less loudly.