Chapter 18


"Why didn't you tell me you were a virgin?" he asked much later.

They were lying on their sides, face-to-face, arms and legs still entwined.

"The subject never came up, until now."

"How is it possible you were untouched? Most girls these days have sex in their teens."

"Well, I didn't. I grew up in a very religious home. My mother taught me early that sex outside of marriage was wrong, and I believed her. I was tempted several times to see what all the fuss was about, but then my best friend got pregnant at fifteen. The boy she loved, the one she was so sure loved her, refused to have anything to do with her when he found out. I decided then and there it would never happen to me. After high school, I went to college. I didn't hang around with the 'cool' crowd because I didn't drink or smoke and I wasn't a party girl." She shrugged. "I hardly dated at all. After I graduated, I was too busy working to have much time for anything else." She looked at him, her brow furrowed. "Who would have thought my first sexual encounter would be with a vampire?" She jackknifed into a sitting position. She had made love to a vampire. Unprotected love. Suddenly frantic, she stared at him. What if she got pregnant?

"Relax," he murmured. "It's impossible."

"You're sure?"

"I'm sure." He drew her down beside him so that her head was resting on his shoulder. "You should have told me you were a maiden."

Kadie smiled faintly, amused by the archaic term. "Why? Would it have made a difference?"

"I would not have touched you had I known," he said, a faraway look in his eyes. "I saw too many women ravaged during the Crusades, and later, in other wars in other places. I vowed then I would never take a woman against her will."

"You didn't take me against my will unless . . . Did you make me want you tonight, the way you made me kiss you?"

"No. Whatever you're feeling for me is real."

She nodded, wondering if she should believe him.

"The attraction between us is genuine, Kadie. I swear it on my honor as a knight."

She ran her hands over his chest. "So many scars," she marveled. "Were you in a lot of battles?"

"So many that I lost count."

She traced the thin white scar on his cheek. "How'd you get this one?"

"Knife."

She ran her fingertips over the shiny white scar that ran from his shoulder to his navel. "And this one?"

"Sword."

She grimaced, thinking such a wound must have been terribly painful. "I can't imagine what it must have been like, fighting with swords. Shooting someone seems much easier than skewering your enemy with a sword, feeling the blade penetrate his flesh," she said, shuddering.

Saintcrow chuckled. "Your idea of pillow talk is a bit unusual. Most women want to hear promises of undying loyalty and affection."

"Women," she remarked, then bit down on her lower lip, refusing to ask the question now demanding an answer.

Raising himself up on one elbow, Saintcrow brushed a lock of hair behind her ear. He didn't have to read her mind to know what she was thinking. Lowering his head, he cupped her cheek, then kissed her gently. "There haven't been as many as you might think."

"One would be too many," she retorted, surprised by her jealousy. He was a man who had lived a very long time, not a monk.

"I've never truly loved any woman," he said. "Does that make you feel better?"

"It would, if I believed you."

"You don't?"

"You're over nine hundred years old, and you're gorgeous. I'm sure women throughout time have been throwing themselves at your feet."

"Well," he said, grinning, "I can't deny that."

"You've never been married?"

"Once. It was an arranged marriage, as most of them were in those days. Eleanor died in childbirth and our daughter with her. I joined the Crusades shortly after that."

"And then you became a vampire."

He nodded. "And marriage in the traditional sense was no longer an option."

"You could have married a vampire."

"Perhaps. But very few vampires marry. A mortal union that lasts seventy years is a rarity. A vampire marriage could last for centuries."

"But if you loved someone, wouldn't you want to be with her forever?"

"I've never met anyone I wanted to spend eternity with." His gaze moved over her, leaving silky frissons of pleasure in its wake. "Until now."

Kadie blinked at him. She needed to say something, she thought. But what? He hadn't said he loved her, but maybe that was a given, if he wanted to spend forever with her. Of course, that was impossible. She didn't have forever. Did she want to spend the rest of her life with a vampire? Not that it made any difference. At the moment, she didn't have any other choice. She was his for as long as he wanted her.

"It's late," he said. "I need to feed, and you should get some rest."

"Is something wrong?"

"No."

She lifted a hand to her neck, a question in her eyes.

"I need more than I want to take from you," he explained.

"You're going to drink from one of the other women here?" The thought sent an unexpected bolt of jealousy clean through her.

"No. I stopped drinking from the women here years ago."

"But they said you take women home with you, and that those women are never seen again."

"It's only a rumor, Kadie. I don't know where it started, but you're the only woman I've ever brought here." The only woman he had ever wanted to share his home and his life.

"So, if you don't drink from the women here, where do you go?"

"Wherever I want," he said, his eyes twinkling.

"Right. You're the boss."

"Exactly." But these days he never went far from Morgan Creek.

Scooping Kadie into his arms, he carried her into the shower and turned on the water, then proceeded to wash her, ever so slowly, from head to foot.

"My turn," Kadie said, and taking the cloth from his hand, she returned the favor. She should have known what the results would be, she thought, laughing softly when he took her, soaking wet, there, on the bathroom floor.

Sometime later, Saintcrow left Kadie sleeping in her bed. He needed to feed, but had business with Lilith first.

He found her in the tavern, alone.

She looked up when he entered. The guilt in her eyes was all the proof he needed.

"Where are the bodies?"

"I buried them, up on the mountain."

"I'm surprised you didn't keep the man."

"I thought about it, but it's been years since I've been able to satisfy my thirst, to take it all. So, what are you going to do about it?"

"Don't do it again. I don't want any killing in my town."

"Unless you do it."

"That's right. Don't make me tell you again." Turning on his heel, he left the tavern. The natives were getting restless, he mused as he drove to the nearest town. He could have gotten there faster using his own preternatural speed, but he enjoyed being behind the wheel, listening to the purr of the engine, being in control of a powerful machine.

He had left Kadie in bed, asleep. It had been hard to leave her, but he hadn't fed for a few days and he was afraid he might take too much. He was surprised by the depths of his feelings for her. In all his life, he had never truly loved a woman. He had not loved Eleanor, though he had grown fond of her. Since then, there had been no one in his life he loved or trusted, no one he wanted as he wanted Kadie Andrews. Making love to her was like nothing he had ever known. The fact that she cared for him was nothing short of a miracle. And miracles had been few and far between in his long existence.

There was a whole world to explore outside of Morgan Creek. If he took her away from there, would she stay with him? Or hasten back to her own home, her old life, without a backward glance?

It would be a risk in more ways than one.

He might lose Kadie.

He might even lose his head.

In the morning, Kadie woke aching in places where she had never ached before, but it was a wonderful kind of pain, a reminder of what they had shared. Remembering the night past had her smiling like a schoolgirl with her first crush.

"Rylan." She had never spoken his first name. It made him seem more human, somehow.

But he wasn't human. He was a vampire, hidden away in some secret place, sleeping the sleep of the Undead. Was he here, in the house? And if so, where? She supposed she couldn't fault him for keeping his resting place a secret. Was he completely vulnerable during the day? How scary would that be?

The other vampires hid out in Blair House when the sun was up. Kadie frowned, wondering again why the people in town hadn't tried to destroy them.

Kadie shook her head, surprised by her bloodthirsty thought. Even if the vampires could be destroyed, there was no guarantee that that would break the spell keeping Marti and the others in town.

Rising, she showered, dressed, and went downstairs for breakfast. Enjoying her first cup of coffee, she found herself thinking about making love to Rylan. If she had to belong to one of the vampires, she could have done a lot worse.

Needing something to do, she dusted the furniture, did a load of wash, mopped the kitchen floor.

Around noon, she drove into town for lunch. Of course, service in the restaurant depended on who felt like working that day.

She found Marti and Rosemary sitting at a table near the window.

Marti waved her over. "Come, sit with us. We just ordered."

"Thanks," Kadie said, taking the chair beside Marti's.

"We haven't seen you for a couple of days. Is everything okay?"

Kadie smiled, thinking of the night past. "Everything's fine."

Marti and Rosemary exchanged glances.

"If I didn't know better, I'd think you were in love with him," Rosemary said.

"Don't be silly," Kadie exclaimed, hoping no one would notice the flush climbing up her neck. She was attracted to him, there was no doubt of that. But love? Ridiculous. He was a vampire!

"Oh, Kadie," Marti said. "Say it isn't so."

"Of course it isn't," she replied hotly. Hoping to change the subject, she asked the question she had pondered earlier. "Speaking of vampires, why haven't you just destroyed them during the day?"

"Believe me, the men have tried," Rosemary said, "but there's no way into Blair House. The men tried breaking down the door, but that didn't work. And the windows are all barred."

Kadie nodded, pleased that her ploy to change the subject had worked.

"Besides," Chelsea said, coming to join the conversation, "there's no guarantee that destroying the vampires will break whatever spell is keeping us here."

Kadie had recently come to the same conclusion herself. Not to mention the fact that, if the townspeople destroyed the vampires, they would have no one to bring them food and drink. Trapped in town with no way out, the inhabitants would all slowly starve to death.

"I'm on kitchen duty," Chelsea said, "so what would you like this afternoon?"

"A bacon and tomato sandwich and a cherry Coke," Kadie said. "Thanks."

"Coming right up," Chelsea said.

Rosemary waited until Chelsea went into the kitchen, then leaned forward as if she was afraid of being overheard, although they were the only three customers in the place. "You do know that all vampires have a certain sexual allure that's almost irresistible to mortals, don't you?"

"No, I didn't." Kadie groaned inwardly. So, they were back to that, were they? She bit down on the inside corner of her lip. Saintcrow had assured her that what she felt for him was real. Had he lied to her? Was she wrong to trust him?

"It's how they attract their prey," Rosemary said. "Vampires are incapable of love, of human emotions."

Kadie shook her head. "I don't believe that."

"It's true."

There was something about the way Rosemary said it that made Kadie look at her sharply. "Are you saying . . . ? I mean, have you . . . ?"

"We all have," Marti said.

"They took you, against your will?"

"That's what I'm trying to tell you," Rosemary said, her voice rising. "They can make you want them, make you think it's your idea."

Kadie didn't know why she was so shocked. Saintcrow had told her that he could compel her to do anything he wanted. He had even proved it one night. But it had never occurred to her that the vampires used their preternatural power to seduce Rosemary and the others. Wasn't it bad enough they took their blood without stealing their will?

Rosemary sat back in her chair when Chelsea appeared with their orders. "Tell her, Chelsea," Rosemary said. "Tell her what those monsters are capable of."

Chelsea's cheeks flushed red.

"So, it's true," Kadie murmured.

Chelsea nodded.

Kadie felt sick to her stomach. She'd been a fool to trust Saintcrow. A fool to believe him when he told her that what she felt for him was real. And if her feelings weren't real, then neither was what they had shared last night.

After lunch, Kadie declined an invitation to go to the movies with Rosemary and Marti. She needed time alone.

Back at Saintcrow's house, all she could think about was what Rosemary had said. All vampires possessed a supernatural attraction. They couldn't fall in love. They were incapable of genuine human emotions.

She prowled through the house, too upset to sit still. It was bad enough that the vampires took the life's blood of the women, but to seduce them against their will . . . that just wasn't right!

And yet, argued a little voice in the back of her mind, if it was true, if all vampires could attract humans, then why hadn't she been attracted to Vaughan? Why had she been repulsed by Kiel? Maybe some humans were immune to their allure. For all she knew, Vaughan had tried to compel her and failed. As for Kiel, he hadn't wanted to seduce her. He had wanted her to be afraid of him, had taken pleasure in scaring her half to death. Why? The answer came quickly. He was a predator. He lived for the hunt, took pleasure in subduing his prey.

In the living room, Kadie sank down on the sofa, a book in her lap, but instead of reading, she found herself staring at the suit of armor standing in the corner. She couldn't imagine wearing anything like that. It must weigh a ton. She wondered again if Saintcrow had worn it during the Crusades, or if it was just a decoration.

Lost in thought, she was hardly aware of time passing until Saintcrow appeared on the sofa beside her.

"Oh!" Kadie exclaimed, one hand pressed to her heart. "You really have to stop that."

"You should be used to it by now."

"I guess." She ran her fingers over the spine of the book, wondering how best to bring up the subject that had been on her mind since lunch.

Saintcrow cocked his head to one side. "Something wrong?"

"Why do you ask?"

"I suppose, after last night, I was expecting a warmer welcome."

"Is that so?"

His eyes narrowed. "All right, what's bothering you?"

She took a deep breath, and said it all in a rush. "Is it true that vampires are incapable of feeling human emotions?"

"Who's been talking to you now?"

"Is it true?"

"Yes, and no."

"That's no answer."

"Most of us turn human emotions off because it makes it easier to prey on people if your feelings don't get in the way. After a while, it becomes second nature to hide what you're thinking, what you're feeling."

"Can vampires fall in love?"

"If they let themselves."

"How am I supposed to know what's real and what isn't? You already proved that you could make me want you against my will."

"I told you the attraction between us was real, and I meant it. There's no way for me to prove it to you. Either you believe me, or you don't. I guess you'll just have to trust me."

Trust a vampire. That was asking quite a lot.

Kadie stared into the distance. She wanted so badly to believe that what she felt for Saintcrow was real, but how was she to know if he was telling the truth? If only she could read his mind the way he read hers.

She could feel him watching her. Was he reading her mind even now? She had never felt like this about any other man. Did that mean Saintcrow was manipulating her? Or that she had finally found the man of her dreams? Just her luck that he was a vampire.

Kadie sighed. They were so different. Worlds apart, she thought, separated not only by hundreds of years but by the way they viewed life. And, most of all, by the fact that he was no longer human. He was, for all intents and purposes, dead during the day.

"Not dead."

The words were so faint, she wasn't sure if she'd imagined them, or if he'd said them aloud.

He needed blood to survive.

"Do you ever get tired of drinking blood?" As soon as the question was out, she wished she could call it back.

He lifted one brow. "Do you ever get tired of eating chocolate?"

"Touche, milord." She looked up at him. "What did you mean when you said, 'Not dead.'"

He shrugged. "I can move about during the day if it's necessary."

So, what was she to do? It was obvious that she wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. Saintcrow was handsome and charming and she enjoyed his company. Why not make the best of it?

"Is that armor yours? I mean, did you wear it during the Crusades?"

"No. That kind of armor came later. I wore chain mail. I got the tin suit at an antique store."

"Oh. Did you wear anything under the chain mail? I mean, all those metal links couldn't have been comfortable against bare skin."

"You're right about that. We wore bries. Think of it as medieval underwear. Over that we wore cloth chausses on our legs. Those were covered by another set of mail, also called chausses. A gambeson protected our body." Seeing the question in her eyes, he said, "A gambeson is a thick quilted coat. We wore our hauberk-the mail-over it. The thing weighed about forty pounds. A surcoat was worn over the armor to keep the desert sun off the metal, and to identify individual knights. Surcoats were usually embroidered with a knight's arms or family crest. During the Crusades, a lot of us wore a white surcoat emblazoned with a red cross to remind us what we were fighting for."

"Do you still have it?"

"No, why?"

"I'd loved to have seen you in it. In days of old, when knights were bold," she said, grinning. "Were you bold? Did you have a lady fair?"

"None so fair as you."

Five little words spoken in his whiskey-rough voice and she melted. Rosemary could insist from now until doomsday that vampires were incapable of human emotions, but she was wrong. Kadie heard the wanting in Saintcrow's voice, saw the desire in his eyes.

He slid his arm around her waist, drawing her up against him, holding her close. For a time, he simply held her, one hand lightly massaging her back.

Kiss me, she thought.

A moment later, he tilted her head up and claimed her lips with his. It was a kiss like none of the others they had shared, one filled with an aching tenderness that gradually grew deeper, more intense. It unleashed a wave of longing deep within her, a hunger for his touch, a yearning to touch him in return.

"Kadie?"

She gazed into his eyes, perhaps into his soul. He wanted her. He was a powerful creature, able to bend her will to his if he chose, capable of taking her by force. Yet he left the decision to her. How could she refuse him when she wanted him so desperately?

When she nodded, he stood, carrying her with him. His steps were long and swift as he carried her up the stairs to her room. He lowered her onto the bed, then stretched out beside her.

He cared for her.

She'd bet her life on it.

A poor choice of words, she mused.

Because that was exactly what she was doing.

He kissed her then, a searing kiss that made her toes curl with pleasure. If she was to die, she thought, there was no place she would rather do it than in Rylan Saintcrow's arms.

In the morning, Kadie woke smiling. She lay there staring up at the ceiling for a long time, reliving the hours she had spent in Saintcrow's arms. What an incredible lover he was, she thought, and then giggled because she had no one else to compare him to. But surely no other man was as tender. Or as inventive. A blush heated her cheeks as she recalled her wanton behavior, and the way he had urged her on, encouraging her to let go of her inhibitions.

Later, lying spent in his arms, she had asked him again where he took his rest, pouted when he refused to tell her. It wasn't fair. She trusted him with her life. Why wouldn't he trust her in return? Did he truly think she would betray him?

The thought made her frown. Had another woman betrayed him in the past?

She wondered about that as she showered, and again while she ate breakfast.

After doing the dishes, she felt the strangest urge to explore the turret rooms. To her disappointment, there was little to be seen. The two in front were empty. The third held a narrow cot and a wooden chair. A black iron cross adorned one wall. The fourth room had a bed, a chair, and a table. A tapestry that looked very old covered the far wall from the floor to the ceiling. The colors were faded, the edges frayed.

Head tilted to the side, she studied the tapestry. It depicted a knight in chain mail mounted on a rearing black charger. The knight wore a white surcoat emblazoned with a red cross. He held a sword in one hand and a shield in the other.

Frowning, Kadie took a step closer. Was that . . . ? It was. It was Saintcrow!

Just looking at his image made her feel warm all over. He hadn't changed at all in over nine hundred years. She ran her fingertips over the image, then pressed her hand to the cross painted on his surcoat. And heard a strange grinding sound, like stone moving against stone.

Curious, she moved to the edge of the tapestry, pulled it away from the wall, and peered behind it to see a narrow doorway. Filled with excitement and trepidation, she opened the door, revealing a long spiral staircase.

Was Saintcrow's lair down there?

Did she really want to know?

She worried her lower lip with her teeth, then turned and ran down the stairs to the living room. She wasn't going down into that dark tunnel without a light of some kind. Perhaps she could find a flashlight in town. If not, then she'd use a candle to light the way.

Kadie was sure she'd set some kind of record for driving to town and back when she returned to the house. Armed with the most powerful flashlight she could find, she ran up the stairs to the turret room, made her way cautiously down the spiral staircase behind the tapestry, then paused.

Was she making a mistake? Who knew what lay at the end of the tunnel? She suspected it might lead to Saintcrow's lair, but what if it didn't? What if that dark passageway led to a dungeon filled with skeletons, or worse, living prisoners who had displeased the master vampire? What if it was filled with bags of blood? Or bags of gold? That might not be as far-fetched as it sounded, she thought. He drove an expensive car. He paid for food and drink for all the people who lived in Morgan Creek, as well as the utility bills for his house, and the rest of the town.

Driven by a need to know what he was hiding, Kadie moved slowly, quietly, down the tunnel. It was eerie, moving through the darkness with only a flashlight to illuminate the way. Her footsteps sounded very loud in the silence that surrounded her.

The tunnel went on and on, straight as an arrow.

Overcome by an unexpected bout of claustrophobia, she came to an abrupt halt, suddenly certain that the tunnel extended far beyond the house.

Forward or back? Which way should she go? She took a step forward, then turned on her heel and started back, only to pause again. She had come this far; why not go on?

Tamping down her fear that the tunnel would collapse, trapping her beneath tons of earth, she hurried forward. To her surprise, the tunnel ended at another door after a few yards.

She ran the light over the door. It was made of oak, crisscrossed with iron straps. There was no lock. No handle. Placing her hand in the center of the wood, she gave it a push. Nothing happened.

Chewing on her thumbnail, she focused the light on the door again. There had to be some way to open it. Starting at the top right corner, she ran her hand over the entire door, then along the lintel and the sides. Nothing happened.

With a sigh of defeat, she made her way back to the staircase, only to find that the door she had come through was no longer open.

She pushed it. She kicked it. She beat on it with her fists until her hands ached and her knuckles were swollen and bloody. But the door refused to budge.

Alarm quickly turned to panic. What if this didn't lead to Saintcrow's lair? What if it led to some long-abandoned storeroom and no one ever came down here?

Her stomach churned with horror.

She was trapped in the tunnel with nothing but a flashlight.

And no one in Morgan Creek knew where she was.