Chapter 41-42

Chapter Forty-one

The hall was majestic, stretching as far as the eye could see.

Its walls were composed of what appeared to be semi-transparent stones. Correction, jewels. Indeed, hundreds upon thousands of diamonds and rubies and emeralds were embedded in the walls, creating prisms of light that were nothing short of spectacular. Placed along the hall were many tables, and seated around these tables were many people. Many bright people. People who were literally glowing. Spirits, I realized. Those who had recently passed over from the flesh.

How I knew this, I did not know. Why I was here, I still did not know.

My attention turned to the group of five men and women who were seated in front of me around a rectangular table. All were watching me expectantly. All radiated warmth and love. All looked hauntingly familiar.

"Welcome," said a voice. I wasn't sure who had spoken.

"Um, hi," I said.

"Please, James, have a seat." Again, I had no idea who was talking. In fact, I didn't see any of their lips moving.

So I sat in a plush red chair that had been waiting for me, a chair I literally sank into, easily the greatest sitting experience I had ever had. Heck, I never wanted to get up.

Anyway, I found myself seated at the head of the long table. To my left was a man and woman. To my right were two women and one man. All seemed ageless. All seemed wise. All were beautiful in unique ways. And all were watching me as if I were the most fascinating man they'd ever seen.

Go figure.

"Where am I?" I asked, and with a start I realized I had not opened my mouth to speak, that I was instead speaking telepathically again. I hadn't meant to, it just...happened.

"You are in the Hall of Knowledge, James," said a voice in my head.

"And which of you is speaking?" I asked.

"We are speaking to you from the One Mind," said the genderless voice, and everyone at the long table nodded together, once.

"But how do you all agree what to say?" I blurted out.

They smiled collectively. "We have worked with each other for a very long time, James."

"Am I dead?" I asked.

There was a pause. "In the physical world, you are very near death, James. But as you can see, in the spiritual world, you are very much alive."

Good job, James. Two days in England and you're already dead.

"No, James, you are not dead," said the One Voice, obviously hearing my thoughts.

"Who, exactly, are you?" But the moment I asked the question, I knew the answer. The more I looked into their faces, the more I began to recognize them.

"Yes, James. We are your friends."

And then it all came back. In a glorious, furious rush. Yes, I knew these people. I had known them all along. I had known them from time immemorial. I had known them through many lifetimes. In fact, through all my lifetimes.

"Welcome back, James."

"Am I in heaven?"

"Yes," said my guides. "You're always in heaven."

* * *

We spent what might have been many hours - or perhaps even days - discussing my physical life up to this point. We discussed the development of my soul: my failed marriage, my writing, my schooling, my many thousands of life choices. We discussed my childhood, my influence on others, the ramifications of every choice I had ever made. I saw how one single act of love could spread throughout the world. I saw how one single act of anger or hate could crush the human spirit. I saw that I was on earth to continue my spiritual lessons, to continue growing, and that I had chosen to come to earth. I learned that the council watched over me as similar councils watched over other spirits. No one was alone, ever. I learned that some spirits made great leaps forward in their evolutionary progress, while others floundered, crushed by circumstances on earth. And still others made very poor decisions, choices that hurt others, hurt themselves, choices that actually stunted their spiritual development. But no spirit was lost, I learned. There is always hope. There is always another lifetime to learn and to grow.

After much discussion, the council grew quiet and I sensed that they had something important to tell me. "We do, James," said the One Voice. "Your work on earth is incomplete."

"What do you mean?"

Another pause. The council members looked at each other, then back to me. "We want you to return to your physical body, James."

"Return? Why?"

"You came to earth for a very specific reason. That reason has not been completed."

"But I thought I was dead."

"No, James. You were badly wounded in battle, but you have not died. At least not yet."

I felt a mild sense of panic. I liked it here. It was peaceful here. "Do I have a choice?"

"Always."

"Then I choose to stay."

The council grew quiet again, and I sensed their overwhelming love for me. I also sensed their deep respect for any decision I should make. They knew life was not always easy in the flesh and presented many challenges. They also knew that life presented many wonderful opportunities for real growth, too, but they would never force me to return, ever, and respected my decision to stay.

I looked at each of them. They looked at me. I felt an overwhelming, inexplicable love for these five spirits. I knew in my heart that I had loved them for eons upon eons.

"Fine," I said. "I'll bite. What's the purpose?"

They smiled at me compassionately, collectively. "We cannot tell you, James. Part of the growing process is to make certain choices at certain times."

"And this is one of those times?"

They smiled again. "Your path cannot be revealed, James. You understand this concept on some level. It is upon this path that the spirit evolves."

"And why do I need to evolve?"

"You don't. It has always been your choice to evolve," said the council. They paused, looked at each other again, and then looked back at me. "We do, however, have a compromise. Are you interested in hearing it?"

"Very much," I said.

They explained the compromise: my specific purpose would be revealed to me now, and if I decided that it was a worthy purpose, the memory of it would be removed from my memory.

"Fair enough," I said. "But if I return to earth, how will I ever know what my purpose is?"

The council smiled gently. "We will remind you, James. We will not let you stray far from the path."

"Unless I choose to stray far from the path."

"Exactly," they said.

"Okay," I said, clapping my hands. "Lay it on me."

And they did, and it must have been one heck of a purpose to complete, because when they were finished, I found myself agreeing instantly to return to the flesh.

What I agreed to, I may never know.

Beyond the transparent bejeweled walls were blue skies and white clouds. Birds flew over distant tree tops. High above, a single source of light shone brightly down, touching everything, infusing everything. But it was more than just light.

It was everything.

And from this light I sensed the greatest of love, a love so powerful that I began to weep. And as I wept, the light in the sky pulsated and grew in size, spreading across the heavens, streaming in through the transparent walls, surrounding me. As it enveloped me, I heard singing - beautiful, sweet singing - and I knew that all the angels of heaven were praising God, and that I was home.

Finally home.

But I wasn't ready to stay.

No, not yet.

Chapter Forty-two

I awoke slowly to the sounds of clashing swords.

Someone shouted something angrily. Someone answered, although much more calmly. I wanted both of them to shut the hell up and give my aching head a break.

I tried opening my eyes but they didn't want to work. I tried again - and this time piercing light stabbed straight through to the back of my skull. I groaned.

God, my head hurt.

Movement just above me. A shadow passing before the light. Something touching my face. Something soft and tender.

Fingers.

More fighting. More shouts. More pain in my head. I heard many voices. Metal clanging against metal. My brain clanging against my skull.

The Hall of Enlightenment. My new friends. My old friends. The dragon. Flying. It all came rushing back to me.

They - my guides and friends - were going to tell me something. Something important. A secret. The reason for my entire existence. And, yes, they had indeed told me. I know they had, but...nothing. The memory was gone.

I groaned.

"Come back to me, James," said a voice over me. A female voice. A soft voice. A voice full of warmth and love and...panic.

I shifted my focus to her.

"Come on, James. You can do it."

Something was hovering above me. Something oval and white and damn beautiful.

I blinked and refocused and then I saw that it was Marion. There was blood on her face. She tried to smile down at me, but she was too distracted by something going on nearby.

And then she turned to her right and screamed.