Even with my affirmation, though, they continued to stare at me, to the point that I started to wonder if I had ink on my face, or my underwear was showing. I was just about to do a panicked mirror check when Maggie said, ‘Wow. Auden. That’s the one.’

‘The what?’ I said.

‘Your dress,’ Esther said, nodding at me. ‘It looks amazing.’

I looked down at the purple dress I’d pulled on moments earlier, which I hadn’t even really looked at that closely, yanking it from the closet only because it was not red or black or white, like everything else I’d tried on. Now, though, as I stepped in front of the mirror, I saw that it did fit me pretty well. The neckline was flattering, the skirt full, and I liked how it brought out my eyes. It wasn’t a dress to stop traffic, but maybe I didn’t need that anyway.

‘Really?’ I said.

‘Definitely.’ Maggie came over to stand beside me, reaching out a hand to touch the skirt. ‘Don’t you like it?’

I studied my reflection. I’d never been one for dresses or bold colors, and had never owned anything that shade of purple before in my life. I looked like a different girl. But maybe that was the point. And like having the right snacks, for a true adventure, the proper attire is everything.

‘Yeah,’ I said, reaching down with my fingers to pull the skirt to one side. When I dropped it, it swished back, rearranging itself, as if it already knew where it belonged. ‘It’s perfect.’

Chapter SEVENTEEN

The morning of the Beach Bash, I woke at eight A.M. to the sound of Isby crying through our shared wall. I rolled over, burying my head in the pillow, and waited for Heidi to come and quiet her down. A few minutes later, the crying turned to sobbing, and I began to wonder what was going on. When she started to all-out scream, I went to investigate.

I found her on her back in her crib, red faced, hair matted down with sweat. When she saw me lean over her, she yelled louder, waving her arms madly in front of her face. When I picked her up, cradling her against me, she quieted down, emitting only a bunch of little gasps, like hiccups.

‘You’re okay,’ I told her, jiggling her slightly as I stuck my head out in the hallway. No sign yet of Heidi, which was sort of worrisome, so I went back in and changed the baby’s diaper, which cheered her up considerably. Then I swaddled her up and headed downstairs, where I came upon Heidi sitting at the kitchen table, boxes of prom favors stacked all around her, the phone to her ear.

‘Yes, Robert, I understand your predicament,’ she was saying as she fiddled with a coffee mug in front of her. ‘But the truth is I was counting on you, and I don’t know if I can find someone else on such short notice.’

I could hear my dad’s voice, distant, replying to this through the receiver. It made me realize how long it had been since I’d spoken to him: a week, maybe even two. He’d finally got the message of my not replying to his messages, though. My voice mail had been empty for a while now.

‘You know what,’ she said suddenly, ‘it’s fine. I’ll just find someone. No, don’t worry about it. Really. But I need to go now. I have a ton of stuff to do today, and…’

She stopped talking, and I heard my dad’s voice again. Whatever he was saying, it elicited nothing from Heidi but a sigh and a shake of her head.

I hesitated, wondering if I should just go back upstairs. But then Isby let out a squawk, and Heidi turned, spotting us.

‘… I have to go,’ she said, then hung up without a goodbye. She pushed out her chair. ‘Oh, Auden, I’m so sorry she woke you up! I thought I heard her, but I was on the phone and…’

‘It’s fine,’ I said as she reached for the baby, smiling at her as she lifted her from my arms. ‘I was kind of up anyway.’

‘You and me both.’ She tucked Isby over her shoulder, patting her back as she walked to the coffeemaker, pouring herself a fresh cup, then one for me. As she handed it over, she said, ‘I jolted awake at four, thinking about everything I had to do in the next fifteen hours. And of course, then when I was feeling just a little bit on top of things, your father called to say he can’t watch the baby tonight after all, because he’s got to jet off to New York to meet with his agent first thing Monday morning about his book.’

I considered this as she sat down at the table again, arranging Thisbe in her lap. ‘Well,’ I said. ‘I can stay with her, if you want.’

‘You?’ She shook her head. ‘Of course not! You’re going to the Beach Bash.’

‘I don’t have to.’

‘Yes you do! You have a date and everything.’

I shrugged, looking down at my coffee.

‘What’s wrong? I thought you were excited.’

I wasn’t sure exactly how to explain the hesitation that had come over me ever since I’d found my dress. It was just this weird sad feeling, like the prom had already fallen short before it even happened. ‘I don’t know,’ I said. ‘I guess it’s just that it’s not the real prom, you know? I mean, it’ll be fun and everything. But it won’t be the same as if I’d gone the first time around, to the real one.’

Heidi considered this, still patting Isby’s back. ‘Well, I guess you could look at it that way,’ she said. ‘Or, you could realize you’re lucky to have another try, and that it’s up to you to make it memorable.’

‘Yeah,’ I said. ‘I guess.’