Part II CHAPTER 10
Ash sank to his knees in the middle of the ER as the pain from his injuries and an overwhelming, unbelievable wave of grief and anger assailed him. He didn't understand why, but he couldn't even breathe at the thought of Tory not being here.
"Tory," he snarled, holding her against his shoulder as he cupped her cold face in his hand and gently shook her body. "Don't you dare fucking die on me. Tory!"
Wanda was there with a doctor and orderlies. Standing behind him, she took his shoulders as the doctor pulled Tory out of his arms.
Ash wanted to fight them and yet he knew he couldn't. They had to save her. Don't interfere. Don't. Interfere.
Wanda's touch was gentle, but it wasn't the touch he wanted to feel. "Ash?" she said, her voice breaking.
He couldn't respond as he heard them calling for a Code Blue. They ripped Tory out of his arms and put her on a gurney before they whisked her away.
Ash knelt there on the floor, his bloodied coat fanned out, watching them run with her through the hallway while his soul screamed out for vengeance against those who'd hurt her.
"I think he's in shock."
Someone touched him. Ash growled, shoving the intern back as he came to his feet and stood there with his legs wide apart. "I'm not in shock. I'm fine."
The intern passed a wide-eyed stare to Wanda.
"Sweetie," Wanda said, touching him lightly on the arm. "You're not all right." Her gaze skimmed down his ravaged body. "You are very hurt and you need to let the nice doctor look at you."
Ash wiped at something warm that was running down his face. Thinking it was sweat, he glanced down to see his hand covered in blood that was pouring out of his temple. How could he explain to them that he'd heal? If they weren't staring at him, he'd make all the injuries vanish . . .
The one who couldn't heal herself was Tory. She was the one who was dead.
"I'm fine. I swear. I just need to go to the bathroom."
The intern was still suspicious but no one stopped him as he left them and entered the small room. Rage so raw he could taste it scorched him. He wanted blood and he could feel his eyes turning red. He manifested a pair of sunglasses over them before someone came out of a stall and caught sight of him in all his immortal glory.
His fury was so great that it arced a burst of power so strong, it shorted out the lights over him. Sparks rained down and sizzled while he struggled for control.
Save her . . .
With a mere thought he could heal her back to normal. No cuts. No wounds.
One stone throw and everything changes . . . He heard Savitar's voice in his head and he hated that part of his conscience. His entire human life had been ruined because of gods playing with his destiny. Of people bringing him back from the dead.
Falling to his knees, he screamed out in raw, unmitigated pain as he buried his face against his arm and struggled for sanity. He couldn't do it to Tory. He couldn't risk what saving her might do to the world. If she was supposed to die, she'd have to die. He refused to tamper with fate.
Fuck fate! You're a god, damn you, Apostolos. Seize your destiny! Save her!
Just because you can, doesn't mean you should. It was the one code he lived his entire life by.
"Don't die, Tory," he whispered, knowing he wouldn't forsake his oath. He wouldn't be like the ones who'd screwed him over by tampering with what should have been left alone.
Disgusted with his cowardice, he glanced at the mirror and flinched. No wonder they'd been so freaked out. He looked like walking death. His face was battered, his clothes torn and bloodied. He would change them, but then the staff would get suspicious if he walked out totally repaired. So he cleaned up his face and went back outside where Wanda was waiting. His heart stopped as he saw her holding the leather jacket that Tory had been wearing.
Wanda offered him a kind smile. "Your friend was resuscitated. They've taken her into surgery."
He took the jacket as a wave of relief washed over him. "Thank you, Wanda."
She nodded. "You sure you don't want to see a doctor?"
"Positive."
She shook her head as if disappointed by his decision. "Well I'll take you up to the waiting room. Do you have any of her information to fill out the paperwork?"
"No, not really. But you know I'm good for the bill. You do whatever it takes, damn the cost."
"I know, baby." She patted his arm as she led him toward the elevators. "We do need the names of her next of kin though."
"Megeara and Theo Kafieri. Theo is her grandfather who lives in New York and her cousin Geary lives in Greece."
"All right. I'll show you up and then come back with the forms."
Ash didn't say anything as she led him into the elevators where he'd been a thousand times while coming in here with Simi to do volunteer work. That was how he'd met Wanda. Her father had been on one of the wards where they'd brought presents at Christmas a couple of years ago after her father had had bypass surgery. They'd been friends ever since.
She took him to a small room that was sterile and cold . . . just like him.
"You need anything?"
He shook his head. What he needed was to know how Tory was doing. But his powers told him nothing.
"Okay. I'll be back."
He sat down to rest his legs that were still throbbing from the car having crushed them. As he moved, he caught a whiff of Tory's scent clinging to his jacket. Holding it to his nose, he inhaled her and wanted to cry. The fear of losing her actually made his hands shake and he didn't understand why. They barely knew each other.
Yet he wanted to storm upstairs and heal her.
All things go rotten. His mind roared at him for allowing himself to care about a mere human. Look at how great Artemis had treated him in the beginning. She'd bought him gifts and made sure he was comfortable, and then she'd turned on him the first time he hadn't pleased her. It was progressive entrapment that always turned against him.
Tory hated you first and then liked you . . .
He smiled at the memory of her throwing the hammer at his head. She was prickly. And smart. And funny. Most of all, she treated him like he was normal. Of course she didn't know he wasn't, but unlike other people she didn't grope him or make him nervous that she was a hair's breadth from trying to screw him.
She treated him like he was just another guy on the street.
"Ash?"
He looked up to see Tory's friend Kim in front of him. Her face was lined with fear and concern as she looked at him and the bloodied jacket he held.
"What are you doing here?" he asked her.
"I work here. Remember? I'm an L&D nurse. I was told by an ER friend that Tory had come in. What happened? Are you okay? Shouldn't you be downstairs being treated?"
He shook his head. "We wrecked on my bike."
Kim swallowed as her eyes filled with tears. "Is she okay?"
"They said she was in surgery. I'm waiting to hear."
She sat down beside him. "No offense, but you look pretty torn up too."
"I'll live."
She gave him a look of supreme doubt. "Why don't you give me your cell number and I'll call you the minute I hear something about Tory. You know I won't leave and you need to see a doctor and get cleaned up." She narrowed her gaze on the hole in his jeans that revealed his ravaged skin. "By the way, that wasn't a request."
Ash nodded as he realized that she was right. He wasn't doing anyone any good like this and he had another matter to attend to. Giving her his number, he left and headed for the elevator. The instant he was alone, he flashed himself to Artemis's temple on Olympus.
His anger mounting, he flung open the doors to her temple with such force, they clamored against the walls. Her koris shrieked before they ran out to leave Artemis alone with him.
Artemis sat up in a huff as she raked him with a feral glare. "What is your wreckage?"
"Damage," he corrected as he stalked toward her. "Can't you tell?"
"What? That you look like crap? You're filthy and you smell. Why didn't you bathe before you came to me?"
"Because a car ran over me, after I was chased by a group of men shooting at me, Artie."
"And that's my fault? How?"
He took a deep breath and counted to ten before he killed the mother of his daughter. Though to be honest, Katra was a grown woman who didn't really need her mother anymore . . . "Does the Atlantikoinonia ring any bells for you?"
"Yes, they do. So what?" That unrepentant stare went through him like an exploding grenade.
When he spoke it was through his clenched teeth as he fought for the strength not to lash out and hurt her. "They tried to kill me, Artemis. And as you can plainly see, I'm not really thrilled over it."
Her face paled. "They weren't supposed to touch you. Ever."
"No," he said, his voice dropping to the low cadence of a demon's, "their orders were to terminate an innocent human on sight. I just happened to be with her when they struck."
She gave him a droll look as she dismissed his concern and anger. "Why do you even care about the human? I was only trying to protect you."
"No you weren't. I know what's in the missing journal. You don't give a shit about my dignity. It's your own ass you're trying to save."
She scooted back on the couch, trying to escape him. "Does this mean you're the one who took the book?"
He paused. "I thought your people had it."
She curled her lip at him. "If we had it, why would we be after the bitch?"
The insult to Tory pissed him off even more. "She's not a bitch, Artemis. Now call your dogs off. I mean it."
She rose to her knees to meet him without cowering. "What if I don't do what you want? They're innocent humans too. Are you going to kill them?"
His hands itched to wrap themselves around that perfect, swan neck of hers and wring it until he had satisfaction. "I am not playing with you."
"And neither am I," she shrieked. "That journal threatens everything and I won't stop until I have it."
He hissed in anger, but she didn't retreat.
She tossed her head back, proud in her defiance. "You won't hurt me and I know it. You love Katra too much. She would be devastated to know her father killed her mother. I should have introduced you two a long time ago. So long as I have her love, I know I'm completely safe from your wrath."
He held his hand up as if he'd choke her anyway, but in the end, they both knew the truth. She was right. As angry as he was, he couldn't hurt her because it would tear his daughter apart.
Artemis smiled seductively. "I've missed you." She slid her arm around his waist.
Ash shoved her away from him. "If you value your worthless life, stay away from me."
He flashed himself from Olympus to Katoteros.
Urian was on his way out the door of the main hall as Ash entered it. "What the hell happened to you? You have a bad run-in with Artemis?"
Ash curled his lip at the ex-Daimon. "One day, Urian, I'm going to bitch-slap you so hard your ears will ring for eternity."
Urian laughed. "But it won't be today, mostly because you don't look like you could do much of anything to hurt someone. Seriously what happened?"
"I wrecked my bike."
Urian rolled his eyes in disbelief. "Fine, don't tell me. Whatever."
Ash let out a bitter laugh as he realized how preposterous that sounded. He'd never laid a bike down before in his life. Upset, angry at Artemis and worried over Tory, he paused to look at the Daimon. "You know, Uri, there's something seriously wrong with me."
"And you're just now figuring this out? Damn, you're the poster child for slow learning."
Curling his lip, Ash started past him.
Urian pulled him to a stop. "That was a joke, Acheron. You were supposed to laugh."
"I'm not in a laughing mood."
Urian nodded in understanding. "So what really happened?"
Ash hesitated. It wasn't in his nature to talk to anyone about anything. And yet he had one burning question that wouldn't go away. "What is so wrong with me that I'm only turned on by women who hate my guts?"
Urian snorted at his question. "You're right. That's sick." He clapped his hand on Ash's shoulder. "One word for you, my brother. Therapy. Get some."
"That's three words."
"It needed expanding . . . and speaking of expanding things, you have a visitor inside who wants to be your new best friend."
Ash cursed as he realized who was waiting for him. "Who the fuck let him out?"
"The girl ghost who wants the two of you to kiss and make up."
Ash ground his teeth together. "I'd rather be hit in the head with the tack hammer Tory threw at me."
"Tory?"
"Long story." Ash let out a tired sigh. "Thanks for the warning. I'll go deal with him."
Ash headed for the doors that led to his throne room. As he passed over the seal in the floor, his clothes changed to his Atlantean formesta and black leather pants. He threw open the doors to find Styxx waiting on the other side.
He paused at the sight of his twin who always caught him off-guard. Every time he looked at Styxx he was reminded of his past. Of the brutality. Of the injustice of their lives.
And against his will, he heard Estes growling drunk in his ear as he held him down by his hair and violated him. "How dare you make me want you like you do. I hate you for what you do to me, you disgusting whore. I. Hate. You." The only thing his uncle had ever freely given him had been blows and insults.
Now Styxx stood before him, a perfect replica with short blond hair and normal blue eyes that Ash would have killed to possess.
Ash looked away as he reminded himself that he was a god and not a worthless whore at the mercy of his brother's cruelty. "I'm really not in the mood to deal with you today, Styxx. What little patience I have was eaten alive about two minutes ago."
"I know. I can sense your moods."
Ash narrowed his gaze threateningly.
"It was a gift," Styxx said sarcastically, "from Artemis when she threw me into Tartarus and gave me your memories. I'm only here to ask you one favor."
Ash felt his skin flash to blue as anger pierced him fervently. "You would dare ask a favor of me?"
Styxx stepped back and nodded before he went down on one knee. "I ask as your brother and as a supplicant to a god."
Ash would have laughed had he not been so angry. What game was Styxx playing with him now? "As a supplicant, what sacrifice do you offer for this favor?"
"My heart."
Ash scowled. "I don't understand."
Styxx looked up with a sincere gaze that scalded him. "I offered you my loyalty and it wasn't enough. So in this, I offer my heart to you. If I lie or betray you, you can rip it out over and over again. Chain me next to Prometheus on his rock."
If he ever betrayed him again, he would. "And what favor do you ask?"
Styxx's eyes were haunted before he whispered. "Let me go. I can't live here anymore, isolated from people. Alone. Banished. I just want the chance to live a life that neither of us ever had a chance to live."
Any other time, Ash would have laughed in his face. But today he was weak with understanding and sympathy for the very thing he wanted himself. What had been done to them hadn't been fair. Styxx's life shouldn't have been tied to his and because of Acheron, Styxx had lost his family, his life and his home.
Maybe a fresh start would do them both good. "Fine, brother. You'll have everything you need to start over."
Throwing his hand out, he flashed Styxx to New York where the prince would blend in best with the population. It was also an area where he would hopefully never lay eyes on his brother again.
Besides, Styxx was right. He could kill him at any time. Let the man have a life if he could find it. Honestly, he wished him luck.
Most of all he wished Styxx a peace that seemed to forever elude them both.
"Simi?" He'd been holding her on his body, against her will.
She pulled off his arm and manifested beside him. Yawning, she glared at him in aggravation. "Akri done left his Simi on his arm for far too long. She done got tired and cranky. Why you treat the Simi like that, akri?"
He cupped her cheek in his hand before he kissed her forehead. "I'm sorry, baby. It's why I brought you here. You should stay for a bit with your sister and Alexion."
She frowned up at him. "But what about you, akri? You've been so sad, but you wouldn't let the Simi come off you . . ."
"I know. I have things I have to deal with and I don't want you hurt. You stay here, Simykee."
She beamed at the endearment he hadn't used since she was a baby demon. "Only if akri promises he will call for his Simi if he needs her."
"I promise."
She held her finger up to him. "Good, cause the Simi knows akri can't break his word."
He smiled and pulled out his black American Express card for her. "Go shop."
She squeed before she ran to the TV and turned it on.
Wanting to be alone, Ash walked through the palace even though he could teleport. There were some times when walking and just being normal meant more to him than all of his god powers combined.
Just because you can, doesn't mean you should. There were some things that didn't need to be done. It was why none of the beings he'd consulted with would tell him shit about his future. Why he didn't heal Tory. There were some lessons, even hard ones, that everyone had to learn. Even the gods.
But right now, he didn't want to learn anything else. He wanted solace and comfort and there was no one for him to turn to to get it. So he entered his bedroom and picked up his guitar from its floor stand. He had a couple of dozen guitars spread throughout the palace here and the various apartments that he kept all over the world, but this one . . .
This was his baby. A Fender James Burton Telecaster with a maple neck and black body covered with red paisley flames, it had the fullest sound he'd ever heard. Sure he had more expensive guitars, but to him nothing played sweeter or smoother than this one.
Simi had even carved a message for him into the back of it. Allagapi akri, Simi. Charonte for "Simi loves her akri."
Ash smiled every time he saw that and his heart swelled with love for her. She could make him smile no matter how upset or sad he was, but she couldn't comfort him today.
He sat down on the bed and just started strumming. Before he knew it, he was playing Pink Floyd's "Wish You Were Here." It was a song that had haunted him since the first time he'd heard it. It was like the writer had known exactly what was in his heart. It was all about the decisions that changed a life and how perceptions could change any and all situations and feelings.
The problem was right now his feelings were so twisted and conflicting that he didn't even know how to begin to sort through them. Torn between what he should do and what he wanted to do.
Torn between three women who were at odds with each other and with him. His mother who wanted to destroy the world, Artemis who wanted to kill Tory, and Tory who wanted to expose him to save her father's reputation.
Unable to stand it, he got up and tossed the guitar on his bed.
"I am a god."
But what good did it really do him? He was still ensnared by Artemis, controlled by her. He was no less afraid now than he'd been as a human. In fact he was more so because now his powers were absolute. With one whispered word, he could end the world. His decisions didn't affect just his life, they could affect everyone's.
Look what he'd done to Nick. Had Ash still been human, he'd have only beat Nick up for sleeping with Simi. As a god, he'd not only caused Nick to kill himself, but in order to bring that commanded fate into being, Nick's mother had been murdered as well as the sister of his friends Tabitha and Amanda.
He hated these powers. Most of all, he hated the responsibility. "I just want to be alone . . ."
A knock on his door intruded on his thoughts.
Ash let out a tired breath as he dreaded what was happening now. "Yeah?"
The door opened to show Urian standing there, looking at him with a guarded expression. "You're really not right, are you?"
Ash narrowed his gaze. "I hope you mean that the way I'm going to take it. Otherwise, in the mood I'm in, you might get your ass kicked."
Urian laughed. "Yeah I do." He entered the room and shut the door. "Look, I heard you when you came in. Not what you said, but what was underneath it. I know it's in my best interest to stay out of it. However, you saved my life once, even though I didn't want you to at the time, and I feel like maybe I should return the favor."
Ash frowned at him as those words pricked at the times in his life when he'd been brought back from death against his will. "I shouldn't have interfered with that, Urian, and I'm sorry for the pain you live with because of it."
Urian's eyes were full of bittersweet torment. "You know, it's all right. If I'd died, Phoebe would have followed me to the grave anyway." Phoebe had been Urian's wife. They'd met when Stryker had sent Urian after her to kill her. Instead he'd fallen in love with her and turned her into a Daimon like him so that they could be together. That forbidden love had cost him his life and Stryker had killed Phoebe in a fit of anger.
Urian cleared his throat. "Unlike me, she wasn't capable of taking a human life, even if the human deserved to die. The only way she could have continued living would have been to feed from another Daimon and that she wouldn't have done either. So you didn't really change her fate by saving me. My father was going to kill her regardless."
But if Urian had stayed dead, he wouldn't have witnessed Phoebe's death and he wouldn't live with the constant pain of it.
"Besides, if I'd died, my niece and nephews wouldn't have someone to threaten their dad when he's overprotective of them." Urian smiled sadly. "I'm the only uncle they have. Kids need an uncle, you know?"
Not from Ash's point of view, but that was a different wound. "So why the sudden girlspeak, Urian? Neither one of us is really into discussing our feelings . . . and no offense, I like the fact we don't."
Urian's gaze burned him with its passion. "I do too most times and I'm truly grateful you don't pry, but as a man who defied everything he once valued in this world and one who sacrificed the love of a father he worshiped . . . even though it ended badly, the days I had with Phoebe were worth every wound I've suffered."
He moved closer to Ash. "I know what it's like to be torn between a love so pure it burns you deep down in a place you didn't know someone could touch you and between your oath and duties. Between the love of a father you've always known and one you know you can depend on forever versus a love that's new and untested. But you know what I learned? It's a lot easier to live without my father's love than it is to live without Phoebe's. I just thought you ought to know that."
Ash didn't speak as Urian left him alone. But he did feel the fissure of power in the air behind him. It was a sensation he knew well.
Jaden.
"That just makes you want to vomit doesn't it?"
Ash arched a brow at the caustic words.
Jaden folded his arms over his chest as he leaned against the wall so that his long brown coat fell open. "Lovey-dovey bullshit. Now let me tell you about what happens when you betray everything you hold dear and the bitch doesn't return the favor. Oh wait, you know that lesson already. The problem is you take the leap and you don't know until it's too late to pull back if you're going to land on a foam-covered mattress or jagged rocks where you lie impaled, slowly bleeding and wishing you'd just die already."
Ash scoffed at the vivid imagery. "You are such a bitter shit."
Jaden shrugged. "My bitterness comes with good company which is normally you."
It was true. They both knew betrayal and they both knew ultimate suffering and the scars it left on the soul and heart. "Why are you here?"
Jaden rolled his eyes. "Your demon is calling me to barter with for a new bag. Thought her daddy might want to take her shopping before she makes me an offer I can't refuse and I make you one really unhappy god-not that I'd care, but since we've been known to help each other out from time to time . . ."
"I appreciate the warning."
"Yeah well, it's what happens when we spoil the things we love. They don't always understand the boundaries and their ridiculous wants can get us killed if we're not careful."
Ash inclined his head in understanding. Though to be honest, he didn't know what had caused Jaden to become the demon broker. If there was ever a being who was less communicative about his past than Ash, it was Jaden. And in all these centuries, Ash had never met a creature yet who knew exactly how Jaden had come to be what he was.
Jaden offered him a sinister smirk. "Bed the woman until neither of you can walk, and get her out of your system. Remember, no matter what they are or where they come from, all women have one simple birth defect. BPD."
"BPD?"
"Bitch Personality Disorder."
Ash laughed bitterly. "Are you sure they didn't misspell your name on your birth certificate? I'll bet if you check, your real name is Jaded."
Instead of answering, Jaden grimaced as he rubbed at his neck as if it were burning. "You know what? I'll trade you my demons for your Dark-Hunters any day. You haven't seen crybabies until you deal with a freakin' demon who is pissed he sold his soul or something else and things didn't turn out just the way he or she envisioned it." He curled his lips. "Demons without backbones should be shot. I'll catch you on-line Saturday." Jaden vanished.
Ash shook his head. He didn't envy the man his role as go between. As bad as the gods were, he'd hate to have to deal with the primary source and while immortals were annoying, they didn't carry the kind of power a demon did and as a rule, they weren't quite so . . . impulsive.
Not that any of this mattered to him at present. The only thing really on his mind was Tory and the bastards out to kill her.
They were still out there. Damn it, he'd gotten so tangled in other matters that he forgot about the fact that the Atlantikoinonia was still gunning for her. He had to get back to the hospital and protect her.
He started to flash out, then remembered he needed to speak with Simi first. She lay on the floor alone, cell phone in hand, ready to shop. "Sim?"
She didn't look at him. "Not now, akri. Kirk's Folly is about to come on."
He turned the TV off with his powers, making her shriek in protest. "Don't bother Jaden again."
She looked up at him and pouted. "But Xirena say he can get the Simi anything she wants. All the Simi has to do is tell him what she will exchange for it so it won't cost akri money so I offered him my boots, but he say no, Simi. I don't like no, Simi."
Ash rubbed his head. "Don't listen to Xirena, Sim. Listen to your akri. Just put it on my card like always and don't barter with Jaden for anything. Ever."
She gave him a childlike smile. "Fine. Can we have TV now?"
He turned it back on.
She went back to ignoring him.
Hoping she could stay out of trouble for the next few days, he returned to the hospital. Pam was now in the waiting room where he'd been earlier.
"Any word?" he asked.
"Not yet. Kim went to check." She skimmed his body which was now covered with his long duster, a gray hoodie and black shirt and jeans. "You don't look as near to death as Kim said you did."
He shrugged as he pushed his sleeves up on his arms. "A shower does wonders for a body."
"So they tell me."
Ash sat down beside her, his heart heavy as they waited and waited with no word. Kim joined them and after what seemed like forever a doctor came out to talk to them.
"How is she?" Kim asked before he had a chance.
"Amazingly resilient and very lucky she got here as fast as she did. Her spleen was damaged, but we've got it put back together. Barring a bizarre infection, she'll be good as new."
Ash let out a deep breath in relief.
"Can we see her?" Pam asked.
"She's still in recovery, but we'll have her out within the hour. You'll be able to see her then."
Kim shook the man's hand. "Thanks, Phil."
"No problem."
As the doctor walked away, Ash turned to Kim. "Since she's going to be here for a couple of days, I have something you need to know."
Kim's face blanched. "Oh God, you're a serial killer aren't you?"
Her logic baffled him. "What?"
"See this is what happens," Kim said to Pam before she looked back at Ash. "You're too perfect which means you're probably Dexter right? Hiding bodies someplace weird. You probably have your mom's body stashed away in your closet."
Ash shook his head. "No, at least not this week." He paused as he hoped he was doing the right thing by telling them what'd really happened this afternoon. "We didn't just wreck. We were run off the road."
Pam narrowed her eyes. "What do you mean?"
"Someone was trying to kill us. Last night, her friend Dimitri was murdered in Greece and his house searched. One of her team must have found something significant and someone wants it bad enough to kill for it. I don't think Tory should be left alone until we know more about it. The guys who came after us today, could very easily show up here."
Pam paled. "Can we get security on her?"
Kim shook her head. "The police won't do anything without concrete proof."
"I can guard her," Ash told them, "but I wanted you guys to know why if I'm not here, another guard needs to be. She can't be left alone."
Pam nodded in agreement. "Don't worry, I'm a major conspiracist anyway."
"And on that note," Kim said, stepping back, "I'm going to cruise by the recovery room and check in on her just to make us all happy."
"Thanks."
Kim patted him on the arm. "No problem. I'll be in touch."
But even so, Ash didn't breathe comfortably again until Tory was in a private room with him by her side.
She was hooked to several monitors and an IV. Her face was so pale that it scared him and he hated that sensation. It was also strange to see her without her glasses on.
Brushing her hair back from her forehead, he smiled at how beautiful she was. Not in a classic way-she honestly had nothing on Artemis in terms of looks, but there was something about her that even while she was unconscious shined through. Her spirit and her impishness. He could already hear her insulting him.
I thought you knew how to ride a bike. Gah, I can't believe you wimped out and lost control like that.
He could almost laugh at her imagined barbed comments as she took him to task for letting her get hurt.
His gaze dropped to her hand. Picking it up, he studied the daintiness of it. Her fingers were long, thin and graceful. The kind of hands that were made to stroke and to soothe. Fingers made to suckle and nibble. Before he could think better of it, he held her hand to his cheek and savored the soft feel of her skin. All his life, he'd craved a loving touch. One that wasn't selfish or hurting.
The only one to touch him like that had been Ryssa, but even she'd been stingy with them. Part of it had been his own fault. So many years of being slapped, pinched and hurt had preconditioned him to tense whenever someone came at his face. Even now he didn't really like anyone to touch him and yet he craved it.
I'm psychotic.
No, not really. He wanted what he didn't know and he didn't know how to get what wanted. It was that simple and that difficult.
But as he held her hand against his cheek, he imagined her awake, touching him. His cock hardened with need and his heart broke over the reality that he could never be with someone like her.
He was forever tied to Artemis. Forever tied to a destiny he'd wanted no part in. Trapped between his mother and a goddess who claimed ownership of him. What he wanted was one single day of freedom to be a normal man who could make decisions that would only affect his own life. A day to laugh and to relax.
And people in hell want ice water.
Wishes weren't magical and his life was what it was. All the wishing in the world wouldn't change that. Sighing, he led her hand back to the bed and placed it beside her.
What he was about to do was wrong and he knew it. He tried to rationalize it by saying that she was going to heal anyway . . . barring infection and what were the odds she'd get an infection? She was young and healthy. He was just speeding the process up so that she wouldn't be tied to the hospital in case the men hunting her came here.
If she's supposed to die, she's supposed to die.
Then she would die and his healing her wouldn't matter at all.
"I'm not messing with her fate. I'm only healing her." As he reached to touch her chest, he remembered the times he'd wanted to die and had been prevented from it. The time when he'd been dead and Artemis had tricked him into taking her blood to bring him back.
But this was different.
Yeah it was real different. Artemis had saved the world by bringing him back. By waking Tory, he might end it.
Still he couldn't stop himself from doing this.
Taking a chance he knew better than to risk, he touched the valley between her breasts and let the energy of life flow from his body into hers. The monitors popped ever so slightly before Tory gasped.
Ash moved his hand away the exact instant she opened her eyes to look up at him.
Tory lay confused as she saw Ash standing over her. With his sunglasses on, she couldn't gauge his mood. Her entire body was sore and she couldn't quite figure out where she was. "Did you hit me?"
Ash gave her a crooked smile. "Why would I hit you?"
He had a point. And as she tried to get her bearings, a faint image went through her mind . . . it was Ash holding her. "Don't you dare fucking die on me. Tory!" Those angry words brought back an immediate flood of memories as she remembered the guys chasing them.
"You were shot!" she said, looking for his wounds.
"No. They missed."
Tory frowned. The one guy had shot them at almost point blank range. How could he have missed? And then she saw the bike going down in her mind and remembered sliding over the street. "Where did you learn to ride anyway? Disasters-R-Us?"
Ash laughed. "I knew you were going to insult me when you woke up."
She wasn't amused by it. "What happened to wreck us?"
"One of the cars clipped our tire."
"And we lived?"
He nodded. "We lived."
"You sure?"
"I think so."
"Yeah, I think you're right." She looked around the hospital room that wasn't much more than a blur of lights and shadows without her glasses. "I don't think I'd be in this much pain if I were dead. Not to mention, if I'm this blind after death, I have a bone to pick with the higher powers."
Ash stared at her in disbelief. How could she be making jokes about what had happened? "I think we left your glasses under the car that hit us."
"Figures. I'm just glad you didn't leave me there too, though to be honest, my ribs feel like the car is still parked on top of me."
Ash didn't say anything since his legs weren't quite the same either.
"Oh my God, you're awake?"
Ash stepped back as Kim squealed and then ran to the bed to embrace her friend. He was always amazed by such friendship and love. Throughout history, he'd witnessed it, but he'd never really felt it. He had people he could rely on. People he called friend, but none of them-not even Alexion-was ever privy to the real him. None of them knew his thoughts and though they might know some of his past, they certainly didn't know all of it.
He was a ghost who walked through life observing it, wanting to take part, but too afraid to risk being hurt to reach out. No wonder he and Jaden got along so well. They were armored to the point they were hollow inside.
And as he'd learned when he'd been human, nothing could ever fill that vast hole. It was endless and it was ever consuming whatever he attempted to put there.
Tory had a strange sensation go through her as she remembered something else from the wreck.
Ash had been hit by the car . . .
Releasing Kim, she looked at him and saw no injuries on his body. Not even a bruise. Yet she remembered clearly the last thing she'd seen before she blacked out.
Ash being run over. Completely run over. It stood out because until then, she'd felt no pain, sliding on the street. Then the instant the car hit him, her pain had set in and her last thought had been that she'd just watched him die . . .
You're imagining things. It's shock from the accident.
Or was it?
What are you saying, Tor? The man's immortal?
How stupid could one woman be? He wasn't immortal by any means. She had an overactive imagination and it was playing with her again.
"Ash said someone intentionally ran you guys off the road."
She blinked at Kim's chatter. "Yeah, they did."
"So what are you guys going to do?"
She looked to Ash who appeared to be watching her. "What are we going to do?"
"I don't know about you, but my plan is simple. Find the bastards and kill them."